# Worst covers you've heard? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 6, 2001, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129 "2001-08-06T15:58:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/21 "2001-08-06T19:56:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CrankyAsAnOldMan \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by slortar \* > > \*\*I’m fighting through a massive mental block to mention this, but the all-time low of cover songs is Poison’s cover of…damn…must punch through…resistance… \*\* > > Oh my good lord in sweet heaven above–do you mean the one that appears on the Less Than Zero soundtrack? Oh god. Oh god. The pain! THE PAIN! It’s bad enough that I _hate_ Kiss’ version of the song… This Poison version is beyond what any human should have to endure. Where’s the screaming skull smilie when you need it? > > It is beyond the awfulest levels of awfuldom (and offaldom) in the history of awfulness. > > And I hate you for the rest of the day for reminding me of it. \*\* I’m sorry I brought back those memories. In exchange for the inadvertant pain I might have caused you, you can at least be comforted by the fact that I wept like a little girl for a half an hour after posting it. ☹ Sheer, unfiltered, unadulterated pain. God save us all. On the other hand, that soundtrack has Slayer’s version of Inagoddadavida, which is **wonderful**. ---
**Author:** ![Nausicaa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@Nausicaa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nausicaa)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/22 "2001-08-06T20:06:06Z")
I once heard a Muzak version of Clash’s “Should I Stay or Should I Go?” There are some things in life you don’t need to know. ---
**Author:** ![Nausicaa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@Nausicaa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nausicaa)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/23 "2001-08-06T20:06:06Z")
I once heard a Muzak version of Clash’s “Should I Stay or Should I Go?” There are some things in life you don’t need to know - that was one of them. ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/24 "2001-08-06T20:14:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pldennison \* > **Back in the early 90s, a band called Overwhelming Colorfast included on their debut a cover of The Beatles’ “She Said, She Said.” Apparently, though, they missed the day that time-signature changes were covered in Little Alternative Musicians class, because they completely blew the 3/4 sections. They played a straight 4/4 all the way through.** As a side note, a Russian jazz band (back before the wall came down and the USSR split and all that good stuff) came through my home town, and had the distinction to have played Dave Brubeck’s “Take Five” in 4/4. Which, you know, **completely defeats the purpose.** Meanwhile, there’s a new version of Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes” that makes me want to carve my ears out of my skull with a paint stirrer. My vote for worst cover ever, though, is Metallica nasally raping, without benefit of lube OR Neo-Sinefrine, Bob Segar’s “Turn the Page.” ---
**Author:** ![dasceder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3d9bf3/32.png) [@dasceder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dasceder)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/25 "2001-08-06T20:29:29Z")
Motley Crue’s cover of “Anarchy in the UK.” This was made especially awful by Vince Neil changing the lyrics to “anarchy in the USA.” Apparently audience members could only relate to domestic anarchy. ---
**Author:** ![Daniel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Daniel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daniel)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/26 "2001-08-06T20:34:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pldennison \* > \*\* > Vitamin C should be given a _Cask of Amontillado_-style punishment for her recent abominable version of the Waitresses’ classic, “I Know What Boys Like.” \*\* _ **why??? why would anyone cover THIS Waitresses song?** _ I own the Best Of The Waitresses CD; it’s a great CD; I love every song on it, they’re all great, except their most famous: I Know What Boys Like. I can’t say I like that song much; I find it profoundly sad that whenever anyone thinks of the Waitresses, they think of that song and not Christmas Wrapping or any of the others. talk about beating a dead horse . . . ---
**Author:** ![Jeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeff)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/27 "2001-08-06T20:35:53Z")
A while back I had the misfortune of hearing Creed do a horrible cover of **Riders on the Storm** , which made me want to throw myself in front of a train. Then again, all Creed’s songs make me want to do that. ---
**Author:** ![seriousart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@seriousart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seriousart)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/28 "2001-08-06T20:55:30Z")
I recently ranted on in a thread about “Your mosted hated song out now” (or something like that). My top couple of tunes were Billy Idol’s pointless cover of “Don’t You Forget About Me” (Wish I could, after hearing THAT one.) And even worse, there’s a live cover of Peter Gabriel’s In Your Eyes. The original has already been released a few too many times. Live, live with back up singers, studio version re-popularized via soundtrack du jour. Thanks, Peter. We got it. Nice song. So along comes some hack who does a piss poor cover of it live, and they release it as a single. Which is great for introducing the song to kids under 3 who may not have had the original crammed down their throat yet. As much as I like covers, I usually only like the one’s that take a new spin to it. This either modernizes it or just adds that band’s unique brand of suck to it. The two I mentioned have all sorts of suck poured on top. They are soaked in suck. ---
**Author:** ![Acco40](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/58956e/32.png) [@Acco40](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acco40)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/29 "2001-08-06T21:05:26Z")
Bowie’s “Heroes” by the Wallflowers. Jeez I hate his voice. Completely uninspired version… at least compared to Oasis’ version which is awesome! ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/30 "2001-08-06T21:07:23Z")
These are all great choices, but I have six words for you folks: “Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”. If you have a strong stomach and have not already seen this train-wreck, I highly recommend a screening, if for nothing else but the brutal incongruity of the songs on the soundtrack to the action of the film. I don’t care who you are, you will never be the same again. As for the songs themselves, they range from the merely insipid (Aerosmith’s _Come Together_ and all the Bee Gees stuff) to the incomprehensible (Earth Wind and Fire’s _Get Back_) to the indescribable - any my vote for worst cover of all time - George Burns doing _Fixing a Hole_. I have nothing else to say. [sub]100th post[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Rossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3e96dc/32.png) [@Rossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rossarian)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/31 "2001-08-06T22:04:07Z")
While it’s been mentioned, I think Madonna should be imprisoned for her cover of _American Pie_. I’d smack her over the had with a newspaper if I ever saw her for making that cover. Here’s another: I’m flipping through the channels the other day and Dolly Parton is covering Collective Soul’s _Shine_. I almost choked. She has no business doing that. She even says “yeah” in the choruses. ---
**Author:** ![Fish42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/4da419/32.png) [@Fish42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish42)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/32 "2001-08-06T22:05:29Z")
Leaving out easy targets like actors-slumming-as-singers (besides, did anyone really expect William Shatner or Bruce Willis to sing well?), the following are some of the more horrendous covers that come to mind: Michael Bolton’s cover of Percy Sledge’s “When a Man Loves a Woman.” Complete butchery of a classic. Any of Pat Boone’s versions of Little Richard’s hits. Of course, all of Pat’s white-bread covers of R&B hits are bad, but “Tutti Frutti” and “Long Tall Sally” go the extra mile. Bob Dylan doing “The Boxer” as a one-man Simon and Garfunkel. Unfortunately, neither one of him is in the right key; or able to harmonize with himself. Linda Ronstadt’s version of Chuck Berry’s “Back in the U.S.A.” Her most wrong-headed cover in a career full of dubious ones. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/33 "2001-08-06T22:15:05Z")
Sorry, **cuautemhoc**. I can match your Sgt. Pepper’s: The Brady Kids did a cover of “American Pie” that was somewhat worse than Madonna’s (believe it or not!) Fenris ---
**Author:** ![HalberMensch242](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ecb155/32.png) [@HalberMensch242](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HalberMensch242)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/34 "2001-08-06T22:35:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > \*\*I’m positive we’ve done this thread before, but I’ll throw one in that I just heard. > > Rammstein’s cover of Pet Semetary as a tribute to the Ramones…sounded exactly like Tanto, Frankenstein and Chris Farley singing Feliz Navidad. > > i’m a big enough fan that I can admit, sometimes…good germans make bad choices. > > jarbaby \*\* Wow…ok…i really really liked that cover, for the same reason i liked their cover of **Stripped** …they’re both really really bad! But that’s why we love rammstein, cause they have the balls to churn out such autrocities. By the way…what did ya think of this years live show? I thought it was their best yet…the burning heart during Mien Hertz Brent…_swoon_! ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Miskatonic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.miskatonic/32/310_2.png) [@Mr.Miskatonic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Miskatonic)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/35 "2001-08-06T23:11:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by casdave \* > \*\*Bananarama’s version of Venus > Bananarama’s version of Nathan Jones > Bananarama’s version of Na Na Na Na kiss him goodbye. > Bananarama’s version of Last thing on my mind. > Bananarama’s version of Once in a lifetime \*\* Bananrama’s version of One Night in Bangkok. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/36 "2001-08-06T23:55:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Hamadryad \* > \*\* > My vote for worst cover ever, though, is Metallica nasally raping, without benefit of lube OR Neo-Sinefrine, Bob Segar’s “Turn the Page.” \*\* I cannot suppress wild, donkey-like brays of laughter every time I hear the way they deliver the line “The sweat rolls down your body…” ---
**Author:** ![bdgr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a87d85/32.png) [@bdgr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bdgr)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/37 "2001-08-07T00:55:44Z")
Ace Freely covering the ELO song do ya. The horror. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/38 "2001-08-07T01:23:53Z")
The Indigo Girls once did a cover of Dire Straits’ Romeo and Juliet that had me wondering if they had ever learned the tune or just heard it described third-hand. After hearing it, I knew why Romeo and Juliet committed suicide. ---
**Author:** ![poohpah\_chalupa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/91b2a8/32.png) [@poohpah\_chalupa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/poohpah_chalupa)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/39 "2001-08-07T01:30:37Z")
“Here, There and Everywhere” by Bette Midler. and any cover of “Help” I’ve ever heard has been an atrocity. “I Saw Him Standing There” by Tiffany ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129/40 "2001-08-07T01:39:40Z")
Hey, do NOT knock Sheryl Crow or Bananarama! (If you want a good Sheryl cover, you should’ve heard her sing One Less Bell To Answer at the Burt Bacharach tribute…very very good.) How about, Faith Hill’s cover of Big Brother and the Holding Company’s “Piece of My Heart.” When she sings it, it’s this cutsey little country tune. When Janis sang it, you could FEEL the pain dripping out of her voice. Faith, may you rot in hell. ANY cover Michael Bolton does sucks. David Lee Roth doing “California Girls.” UGH Ugh…why did you have to bring up Tiffany? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-covers-youve-heard/75129.md?page=3)