# Worst excuse by famous person caught doing bad?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [March 17, 2006, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753 "2006-03-17T15:30:22Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 11\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/41 "2006-03-18T08:02:17Z")

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It’s not as bad as most of the other stuff in this thread, but when she got busted for lip-synching on SNL, Ashlee Simpson used every excuse she could think of in the first 24 hours. First it was “my band started playing the wrong song,” then the singing was “just a guide vocal,” then I think she had “throat nodes,” and then she had a sore throat and/or an upset stomach. There was no excuse for her dancing.

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**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/42 "2006-03-18T11:47:51Z")

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How about ‘Discussing Uganda’, which is a euphomism for having illicit sex whilst supposedly acting an official capacity.

Googlin turns up lots of referances.

It has been modified since to become ‘Discussing affairs of an East African nature’

[http://private-eye.borgfind.com/](http://private-eye.borgfind.com/)

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/43 "2006-03-18T12:07:17Z")

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> [@Ghanima](#):
>
> The twinkie defense - junk food made me do it!

I think several of these seemingly idiotic defences are the work of Ellis Rubin (he also came up with the TV defence), however if you read his book _Get Me Ellis Rubin_ you will quickly discover that the media totally distorted the details of each case.

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**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/44 "2006-03-18T13:45:43Z")

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The biggest excuse of all: A racist cop set me up to look guilty.

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**Author:** ![jimmmy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/73ab20/32.png) [@jimmmy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimmmy)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/45 "2006-03-18T13:53:57Z")

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[I was exhausted](http://msnbc.msn.com/id/10693385/)

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/46 "2006-03-18T13:58:46Z")

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> [@Annie-Xmas](#):
>
> The biggest excuse of all: A racist cop set me up to look guilty.

I saw a documentary about OJ’s trial recently. F. Lee Bailey said that he was a really popular guest at parties during the trial, however when people started talking about the trial he would say to them, “Are you talking about the same trial? You realise OJ will be acquitted?” He said after the verdict he was never invited to another party. He explained that the cop **is** a racist and what kind of defence would not not reveal that truth.

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**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/47 "2006-03-18T14:39:39Z")

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> [@don't ask](#):
>
> I saw a documentary about OJ’s trial recently. F. Lee Bailey said that he was a really popular guest at parties during the trial, however when people started talking about the trial he would say to them, “Are you talking about the same trial? You realise OJ will be acquitted?” He said after the verdict he was never invited to another party. He explained that the cop **is** a racist and what kind of defence would not not reveal that truth.

I would suggest reading Furman’s “Murder in Brentwood” before passing judgement. Bailey might just be a little prejudiced on the subject. Note that OJ was found guilty in the civil trial.

Say what you will about Furman, his second book “Murder in Greenwich” helped get Kennedy cousin Michael Skakel convicted in a very cold murder case.

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/48 "2006-03-18T14:46:35Z")

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I gathered that Bailey’s argument was that Furman had been specifically told to stay out of the investigation but managed to pop up with vital evidence whenever required. He wasn’t arguing for OJ’s innocence, just pointing out that an effecient investigation would not have allowed Furman to find all the evidence,

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/49 "2006-03-18T14:53:57Z")

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I should add that I think that the likelihood that OJ is guilty is the same as the likelihood that tomorrow the sun will rise in the East.

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**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/50 "2006-03-18T15:35:33Z")

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> [@don't ask](#):
>
> I saw a documentary about OJ’s trial recently. F. Lee Bailey said that he was a really popular guest at parties during the trial, however when people started talking about the trial he would say to them, “Are you talking about the same trial? You realise OJ will be acquitted?” He said after the verdict he was never invited to another party. He explained that the cop **is** a racist and what kind of defence would not not reveal that truth.

It would be kind of fun to invite Mr. Bailey and [Vincent Bugliosi](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0440223822/sr=8-1/qid=1142695915/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-9105321-9697718?%5Fencoding=UTF8) to the same party just to see what would happen.  
Or maybe for entertainment play a [Dana Carvey DVD](http://cgi.ebay.com/Dana-Carvey-Critics-Choice-HBO-Special-VERY-RARE-DVD_W0QQitemZ9116380537QQcategoryZ617QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem) just to watch him squirm.

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**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\
**Post date:** [March 18, 2006, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-excuse-by-famous-person-caught-doing-bad/348753/51 "2006-03-18T16:21:21Z")

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> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#):
>
> I got bad intelligence.

Anything you say can and will be used against you…

I just heard the sound of this quote being sucked into a thousand computers to be used against you in future Pittings, even with the bad grammar. 😉

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