# Worst Halloween treat ever

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [October 21, 2003, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754 "2003-10-21T18:58:41Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/21 "2003-10-22T13:20:41Z")

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**Troy!** Share! I love the beige globs too. Ditto MaryJanes and Bit O’ Honey - same sorta chewy peanut-buttery goo with the possibility of losing a filling… yeah, I love when my candy has that element of risk!

And I’d agree with **cher3** - Kiwanis or Shriner peanuts just suck.

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**Author:** ![hocow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hocow/32/4112_2.png) [@hocow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hocow)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/22 "2003-10-22T14:14:46Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Kalhoun \*  
> \*\*
> 
> Second worst is candy corn. God…it reminds me of rotten teeth.
> 
> \*\*

I agree with **Kalhoun**. Candy corn is the product of Satan.

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**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/23 "2003-10-22T14:15:31Z")

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Pal gum had to be the worst. It would be all stale and hard. Yuck.

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**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/24 "2003-10-22T16:03:33Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Cervaise \*  
> \*\*Jizzin’ in the plastic pumpkin. \*\*

Tricks or treat.

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**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/25 "2003-10-22T16:23:26Z")

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My vote, apples or coins.  
C’mon people, it’s once a year, you got the money, the kids don’t, show a little love, get creative, spend some cash.  
I get about 50 kids a year at my door.  
This year i’m handing out glow necklaces $50 per 50, and full size Snickers (cheap when you buy them at Costco or Sams).  
$70 a year won’t kill me and it’s worth it to be “The House” in the neighborhood to visit. It also buys me some protection from the kids, they let me know if anyone messes with my house year round (eyes on the street).

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**Author:** ![Gundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Gundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gundy)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/26 "2003-10-22T16:54:33Z")

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The peanut butter kisses in black and orange wrapping beat all, followed by candy corn for the most commonly given shitty candy.

Growing up in Chicago, we’d get a lot of freaky ethnic candies. Pissed me off every time. I don’t want your gooey Polish candy or your funky Phillipine tamarind candy or your gritty Mexican marzipan! I want Snickers! Jolly Ranchers! Laffy Taffy! AMERICAN candy! Cut a kid a break, man.

Oooh, and what would really rake my nerves was getting candy obviously leftover from the previous Christmas. Oh HELL no, you didn’t just give me a peppermint taffy with a wobbly Christmas tree in the center! This is the LAST time I come over and dance for you people again!

No offense intended, natch.

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**Author:** ![Yarster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/7c8e57/32.png) [@Yarster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yarster)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/27 "2003-10-22T17:45:57Z")

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One year when I was a kid a neighbor actually had the gall to hand out pomagranites from his tree out back. Do you have any idea how badly these fruits stain a stucco house? Neither did he.

That’s why he never gave those out again after that.

I’d second the generic candy from Pick n’ Save/ Big Lots. Those taste like hammered shit.

Once or twice as a kid, I got those fucked up jelly candies covered in sugar that look like orange slices. Assuming I even liked these, what parent is going to let their kid eat one of these unwrapped pieces of crap that could be coated with who knows what…

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**Author:** ![DaToad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@DaToad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaToad)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/28 "2003-10-22T18:31:14Z")

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I’m with ya **Kalhoun** , circus peanuts are an abomination on any occasion.

My worst:

In the shell nuts. Walnuts, almonds, pecans and hazelnuts. WTF?

Also, there was an older lady on our block that would put a small handfull of popcorn in a piece of orange or black tissue paper and tie it with a piece of black or orange ribbon. She got an “A” for presentation, and an “F” for content. Wow, in thinking about her now, she was really nice old lady. In the summer, she gave us kids Cokes or lemonade, sandwiches, a piece of cake, or cupcakes, etc. Truly a fond childhood memory.

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**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/29 "2003-10-22T18:40:12Z")

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When I was a kid, the only treat we feared was a loaded apple. The razor blade was dreaded, but easily detected. Now, people should just give gift certificates…everything is suspect.

My son was about 5 when the Tylenol tampering thing happened in Chicago. That whole scene took a big shit on Halloween from there on out. What a shame.

One year I ran out of candy and gave DIMES instead. Some obnoxious little goblin thought that was a shitty idea. I would have leaped for joy if anyone ever gave ME a dime. Ungrateful little shits.

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**Author:** ![yBeayf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/e274bd/32.png) [@yBeayf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yBeayf)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/30 "2003-10-22T20:33:42Z")

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Those orange-and-black peanut butter taffy things rule! And I’d take Mexican tamarind candy over chocolate any day.

Although when I was growing up we lived near a guy who worked for the Mars corporation. He gave out good candy. The worst candy ever received by me would have to be candy corn; I cannot stand the little multicolored hamster turds. Circus peanuts are pretty evil, too. I must confess, though, to being one of those people who has handed out the peanut butter taffies. They’re cheap, and I like them, so obviously everybody else does too, right?

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**Author:** ![TommyTutone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c4cdca/32.png) [@TommyTutone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TommyTutone)\
**Post date:** [October 22, 2003, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/31 "2003-10-22T20:51:26Z")

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I forget the worst candy I got (the best treat though was a can of soda).

The worst treat I gave, though, was nothing:

New to NH, in a larger subdivision than the rural neighborhood we came from. As the night goes on, my mother notices that there are a LOT more kids coming than we had treats for. She goes out saying she’d pick some up at the supermarket (quite a ways away) and my brother and I had to keep giving kids candy for as long as we had some.

Him being 13 and me being 15 at the time were far from clever and before we knew it the candy was gone. Quickly, he runs to the closet, puts on a sheet and starts going door to door for candy that we could redistribute back to the real trick or treaters.

In the meantime, while HE’S out, I run out of candy. I failed to consider looking in the pantry for items (mmm… canned beans), so when the next kids came to the door, I reached into my bowl, made a closed fist, stuck the fist deep into each kid’s bag and ‘flicked’ the side of the bag, trying to make it sound like I put candy in there.

Then went on for 5 or 6 kids before my brother returned. Of course, by the time my mother made it back with a big stash, trick or treating was done for the night.

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**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/32 "2003-10-23T01:08:30Z")

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Now see, I like candy corn. Lurve it, in fact. Mmmm.

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**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/33 "2003-10-23T01:13:32Z")

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Call me nuts, but I like circus peanuts.

I do not, however, like that weird-assed beige taffy shit in the orange and black wrappers. Adding sugar to weird shit and wrapping it in orange and black wrappers does not make it candy, nor does it make it a decent deal for Halloween. Come on, folks, it’s only once a year. Do it RIGHT!

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**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/34 "2003-10-23T02:44:51Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Wang-Ka \*  
> **Call me nuts, but I like circus peanuts.**

You are nuts. Even Cecil thinks you have a [serious mental disturbance](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_222b.html).

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**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/35 "2003-10-23T02:46:13Z")

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Well, when my mom was a kid, she got what she thought was a rock while out trick or treating.

It wasn’t until she’d thrown it in the bushes in disgust that she found out—from her fellow trick or treaters—that it had been a big chunk of hard fudge. :smack:

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**Author:** ![Ms\_Macphisto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@Ms\_Macphisto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Macphisto)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/36 "2003-10-23T03:53:31Z")

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Aside from the stuff in the black-and-orange wrapper and candy corn, my least favourite was always Thrills gum. Looks like purple chiclets, tastes like soap.

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**Author:** ![Dizzy\_Fingers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dizzy\_Fingers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dizzy_Fingers)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/37 "2003-10-23T04:51:51Z")

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Generic candy corn. [Consider yourself warned.](http://www.theonion.com/3941/opinion1.html)

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**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/38 "2003-10-23T05:10:57Z")

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Now, that I agree with. Generic candy corn is a blasphemy before god. Woe unto the sinner who doth let impure candy corn cross his lips! REPENT!

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**Author:** ![Tikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5daacb/32.png) [@Tikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tikki)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/39 "2003-10-23T07:18:51Z")

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I like Circus Peanuts too. They’re sort of like stale marshmallows, which is when they’re the best.

No one’s mentioned those imatation Tootsie Roll things that come in different colors and taste like wax. Ugh!

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**Author:** ![DarkPrince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@DarkPrince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkPrince)\
**Post date:** [October 23, 2003, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-halloween-treat-ever/208754/40 "2003-10-23T08:15:46Z")

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My parents were those sucky people who didn’t give out candy. Instead they gave out TOYS!!! Woo, yeah! Excitement!  
I always tried to leave early for trick-or-treating so nobody from school would see me at the house that gave out that junk. Imagine thrusting your open bag forward and getting:

1. Crappy black and orange plastic spider rings. They sucked, dear god they sucked.

2. A crayon. Yup, not crayon **S** , just one crayon per kid. They said one year they decided to splurge and give out little boxes of 3 crayons. I’m sure the kids wept with joy.

3. Genuine Opalcat action figures with kung-fu grips. Actually those were pretty cool.

4. Little rubber ghost/pumpkin/bat finger puppets. They were cute. They were rubber. They were The Suck.

5. Those damned wax lips. Did anyone _ever_ actually like those things?

They finally got the hint after I told them that they might as well puke in the kids’ open bags or just drop the charade and punch them in the crotch and laugh.

Btw, what are these tan things in orange and black? Through either luck or divine intervention I never got them as a kid and have no clue what they are… 😕

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