# Worst lyrics in rock/pop music **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 2, 2009, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759 "2009-12-02T21:22:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/61 "2009-12-03T17:43:51Z")
\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ by the Black Eyed Peas. ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/62 "2009-12-03T17:55:32Z")
> [@Headrush042](#): > > I always read that as a swipe against the leaders of America and Britain demonizing the Russians, as opposed to a simplistic appeal to our basic humanity. In fact, the message I took away from that song was that the Russians weren’t the “bad guys” of the cold war, the politicians were (on both sides). I didn’t think it was dumb at all. If that was his point, then it was even dumber than I thought. ---
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/63 "2009-12-03T18:00:55Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > As promised, more cack from Train: > > “Can you imagine no love, pride, _deep fried chicken_ > Your best friend always sticking up for you even when you know you’re wrong” The rest of that bridge is even worse, IMO: _Can you imagine your first dance, freeze dried romance Five-hour phone conversation, the best soy latte that you ever had And… me_ Soy lattes. We’re now singing about soy lattes? No, please, just no. For one of my favorite bands, I submit: [Cracks in the Pavement](http://lyrics.wikia.com/Duran_Duran:Cracks_In_The_Pavement) which must be appreciated in its entirety, because it’s just all bad. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/64 "2009-12-03T18:20:40Z")
> [@Pulp\_Friction](#): > > …\*America: \*“There were plants and birds and rocks and things.” > \* I raise you, “In the desert you can remember your name for there ain’t no one for to give you no pain” _America_ must have the worst collective lyrics ever. ---
**Author:** ![FordTaurusSHO94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f07891/32.png) [@FordTaurusSHO94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordTaurusSHO94)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/65 "2009-12-03T18:22:13Z")
The part where Madonna raps in American Life is full of embarrassing lyrics such as: I’m drinking a soy latte I have a double shot-ay It goes right through my body ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/66 "2009-12-03T18:24:18Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > The Piano Man’s full of them: > > “And he’s talkin’ with Davy who’s still in the navy > And probably will be for life” > > What, like a career in the navy is some kind of embarrasment or punishment or something? According to Billy Joel, when he played at the piano bar the song was based on, there was a regular who actually was named Davey who was in the Navy, and as far as he knew, still was. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/67 "2009-12-03T18:29:59Z")
> [@Ximenean](#): > > But back on the lyrics themselves, what is wrong with Huey Lewis’s “don’t need no credit card to ride this train”? Given that he’s singing about a metaphorical train that represents the _power of love_, in this place ([and this is the only this place in the song where a train is mentioned](http://www.plyrics.com/lyrics/earlynovember/poweroflove.html)), it seems really strange that what he’d like to point out is the various forms of tender \*not \*required, especially since he’d already enumerated all of ‘money’ as one of those. “Don’t worry about credit cards” always stuck out very, very strangely for me. _If you love somebody, set them free_. No, I’m not being ironic. I was the last person on earth to see that Hallmark card, and I’m banking on the song’s listeners being unfamiliar with it. _Have you ever really, really really really, loved a woman?_ ---
**Author:** ![maladroit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f475e1/32.png) [@maladroit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/maladroit)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/68 "2009-12-03T18:32:05Z")
Stranglehold by Nugent, love the music but jeez ---
**Author:** ![Emily\_Litella](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emily_litella/32/3370_2.png) [@Emily\_Litella](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emily_Litella)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/69 "2009-12-03T18:36:41Z")
I had another look and I had a cup of tea and a butter pie Butter pie? The butter wouldn’t melt so I put it in the pie - from Admiral Halsey Huh? ---
**Author:** ![Stephe96](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Stephe96](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stephe96)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/70 "2009-12-03T19:18:38Z")
The Beatles - Mother Nature’s Son _Born a poor young country boy…_ As opposed to being born old, Paul? ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/71 "2009-12-03T19:39:00Z")
> [@Emily\_Litella](#): > > I had another look and I had a cup of tea and a butter pie > Butter pie? The butter wouldn’t melt so I put it in the pie - from Admiral Halsey > > Huh? [It’s a northern thing. You wouldn’t understand.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butter_pie) ---
**Author:** ![Scougs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scougs/32/3158_2.png) [@Scougs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scougs)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/72 "2009-12-03T20:03:43Z")
My submission is pedantic, and a different kind of dumb. “Nothing has been proved” by Dusty Springfield and the Pet Shop Boys, from the film Scandal. Wonderful song, sumptious production, a delight to listen to. It cleverly tells the whole story of the Profumo Affair in one pop song. To remind the listener of the era, each stanza finishes with: “‘Please please me’ is number one” Only one problem - “Please please me” only got to number two. I know it wouldn’t scan as well, but it still bugs me. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/73 "2009-12-03T20:26:28Z")
> [@Scougs](#): > > Only one problem - “Please please me” only got to number two. Not so cut-and-dried. Per Wikipedia: > [@](#): > > On 22 February 1963 the song reached #1 on the singles charts compiled by the New Musical Express **(the most recognised chart at the time)** and the Melody Maker, but it only reached #2 on the Record Retailer chart, which subsequently evolved into the UK Singles Chart and is the most widely quoted today. ---
**Author:** ![Scougs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scougs/32/3158_2.png) [@Scougs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scougs)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/74 "2009-12-03T20:58:34Z")
> [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](#): > > Not so cut-and-dried. That makes me happy. I love that song and I couldn’t believe they’d made that mistake. I originally checked it against the Guinness Book of Hit Singles (in the days before the internet) and recently re-checked on [everyhit.com](http://everyhit.com). I do remember the days of more than one chart, though - like when the BBC chart kept “God Save the Queen” at number 2, when it should have been number 1, and was on the NME chart. Hijack over, back to the thread. Has anyone mentioned the Killers and “Are we human, or are we dancer” yet? ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/75 "2009-12-03T21:07:41Z")
> [@Stephe96](#): > > The Beatles - Mother Nature’s Son > > _Born a poor young country boy…_ > > As opposed to being born old, Paul? The Curious Case Of Paul McButton. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/76 "2009-12-03T21:10:16Z")
> [@Cardinal](#): > > Someone wrote about Rosecrans Boulevard??? I only know it from, oh, Compton to Buena Park, but pray tell what kind of inspiration is that street? It was Jim Webb, who wrote quite a few songs in the 60s that were performed by others – **Macarthur Park** (Richard Harris), **Up, Up, and Away** (The Fifth Dimension), **The Worst That Could Happen** (The Brooklyn Bridge), **By the Time I Get to Phoenix, Wichita Lineman, and Galveston** (Glen Campbell). Critics – with a straight face – compared him to Bob Dylan. **Rosecrans Boulevard** was recorded by Johnny Rivers and also the Fifth Dimension. The lyrics include: “Then there was the time you drove the little car down Sunset Boulevard doing ninety miles an hour in a thirty mile zone and blamed me when we got that ticket.” The lyrics are so bad that you’d be hard pressed to find them on any lyric site on the web. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/77 "2009-12-03T21:16:43Z")
> [@RikWriter](#): > > How about Bob Seager and “Shame on the Moon?” > “Until you’ve been beside a man you don’t know who he knows.” > Wha-huh? Remember, this was before Facebook. ---
**Author:** ![Martha\_Medea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@Martha\_Medea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martha_Medea)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/78 "2009-12-03T21:19:18Z")
> [@Ponch8](#): > > And from the same song: > I know that I must do what’s right > As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serrrrr-engeti I always liked that song, even though the lyrics are cheesy and it gets that special award for condensing as many syllables as possible into a line. Thing is, I always heard it as “rises like an empress”. In any case, Kilimanjaro doesn’t actually rise like anything above the Serengeti. The mountain is a couple of hundred kilometres to the south east.🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/79 "2009-12-03T21:30:57Z")
Interesting timing on this thread. As I was driving about an hour ago, the song “Eye of the Tiger” came on. I like that song. But there’s one part that makes me wonder if Survivor ever listened to their own lyrics and thought about it: _It’s the thrill of the fight Rising up to the challenge of our rival And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night_ If he’s the last survivor, he _has_ no prey! And no rivals, for that matter. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759/80 "2009-12-03T23:14:52Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > The Piano Man’s full of them: > > “And he’s talkin’ with Davy who’s still in the navy > And probably will be for life” > > What, like a career in the navy is some kind of embarrasment or punishment or something? Billy Joel’s full of them. But I’ll defend him on this one. The key word there is “still.” This guy probably didn’t plan on joining the Navy and didn’t want to make a life of it, but he’s never going to do anything else. (Davy/Navy is a really irritating rhyme, though.) The “real estate novelist” is the same idea. The whole song is about people who are never going to amount to anything and are trying to forget about it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-lyrics-in-rock-pop-music/519759.md?page=5)