# Worst. Military analogy. Ever. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 28, 2003, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899 "2003-03-28T21:52:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/1 "2003-03-28T21:52:26Z")
I just heard one of CNN’s numerous retired military folks commenting on the fighting at Basra-- and he said, “The last thing we want is for this to become another Stalingrad.” What the heck? Even if you are able to digest this as a sort of context-free nuts & bolts analogy, it seems a little early to raise the spectre of a year-long quagmire… …but considering the source, I was pretty surprised to hear the guy invite folks to compare the current coalition forces with invading Nazis. Wow. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/2 "2003-03-28T21:54:56Z")
Right up there with calling a successful bombing run “another Pearl Harbor.” ---
**Author:** ![Trucido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@Trucido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trucido)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/3 "2003-03-28T22:06:36Z")
One of my professors, before the war began, used the phrase “Stalingrad on the Tigris.” A radio commentator recently used the phrase “Stalingrad on the Euphrates.” I agree with the thrust of the analogy being totally inappropriate, though… No battle of wills here, no desperate pouring of millions of infantry through the Tractor Factory and Barrikady works. I don’t think the Iraqis or the Coalition have the will to do even half of that, and the Iraqis don’t have the men or industry to support a cauldron like Stalingrad. ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2003, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/4 "2003-03-28T23:52:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Larry Mudd \* > **…but considering the source, I was pretty surprised to hear the guy invite folks to compare the current coalition forces with invading Nazis.** That’s a pretty unfair statement. The point of analogies is to draw similarities between dissimilar situations. From the context you’ve given, there’s no reason to conclude that such a comparison was intended or is warranted. ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/5 "2003-03-29T00:15:15Z")
Shrub’s team initial naming of the war on terror a “Crusade.” Hands down, all-time winner in this category. What in Hades were they all smoking that day? ---
**Author:** ![Kaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/fbc32d/32.png) [@Kaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaf)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/6 "2003-03-29T00:54:43Z")
I’m just waiting for an announcer to call the situation “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra”. ---
**Author:** ![the\_Lady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bb73d2/32.png) [@the\_Lady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Lady)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/7 "2003-03-29T01:03:12Z")
Kaf - I think that’s the funniest thing I’ve heard all month. ---
**Author:** ![JRootabega](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8e7dd6/32.png) [@JRootabega](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRootabega)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/8 "2003-03-29T01:05:05Z")
When the walls fell!! That had to be the _worst_ ST:TNG episode I’ve ever seen. Am I alone? ---
**Author:** ![finn1911](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d78d45/32.png) [@finn1911](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/finn1911)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/9 "2003-03-29T01:49:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kaf \* > \*\*I’m just waiting for an announcer to call the situation “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra”. \*\* hahaha!! ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/10 "2003-03-29T01:55:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by JRootabega \* > \*\*When the walls fell!! > > That had to be the _worst_ ST:TNG episode I’ve ever seen. Am I alone? \*\* Have you ever seen _Imaginary Friend_, _Code of Honor_, _The Loss_, _The Outcast_, or _Dark Page_? Because _Darmok_ was better than all of them. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/11 "2003-03-29T07:11:24Z")
Dang it. MY “Darmok and Jalad” joke came in a much funnier context, and I didn’t get a single “ha”. Dagblast it all anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/12 "2003-03-29T07:52:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by JRootabega \* > \*\*That had to be the _worst_ ST:TNG episode I’ve ever seen. Am I alone? \*\* Well, in any case it’s my favorite ep, so there… 😛 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Spiny\_Norman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Spiny\_Norman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiny_Norman)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/13 "2003-03-29T08:39:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Larry Mudd \* > \*\*I just heard one of CNN’s numerous retired military folks commenting on the fighting at Basra-- and he said, “The last thing we want is for this to become another Stalingrad.” > > What the heck? Even if you are able to digest this as a sort of context-free nuts & bolts analogy, it seems a little early to raise the spectre of a year-long quagmire… …but considering the source, I was pretty surprised to hear the guy invite folks to compare the current coalition forces with invading Nazis. > > Wow. \*\* I dunno. In the military literature I’ve read, Stalingrad is very often used as the Classic Example of relatively modern forces in drawn-out, high-loss urban combat. If I were to venture a guess, the CNN commentator used the term in that context only, without considering the moral dimension at all. Studying old campaigns will sometimes do that to you. Would you have preferred it if he used Groznyj ? ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/14 "2003-03-29T11:52:06Z")
I think that even if the commentator didn’t _intend_ the Nazi analogy, it’s easily inferrable from what he said. Personally I think the worst phrase I’ve heard used in this war is ‘hammer time.’ LMAO @ Darmok & Jalad - I find that one of the most interesting ST:TNG eps ever, if only for their misunderstanding of how language evolves. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/15 "2003-03-29T15:20:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SciFiSam \* > LMAO @ Darmok & Jalad - I find that one of the most interesting ST:TNG eps ever, if only for their misunderstanding of how language evolves. I’ve wondered how a society with technology at lesat comparable to the Federation manages to function with a language like that. If you’re building a spaceship, you need a certain degree of precision. It’s hard to ask your buddy to hand you an 11mm crescent wrench when you can only say things “The curved sceptre that turned at Hantana.” (buddy gives you a 10mm) “At Hantana! HANTANA, you idiot, not Frendar!” Anyhoo, among misplaced historical references, the worst I’ve ever seen was some TV station pushing its football coverage with a guy saying in a gruff voice: “Whoever said Sunday was a day of rest?” Uh… God? ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/16 "2003-03-29T16:25:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SciFiSam \* > **I think that even if the commentator didn’t _intend_ the Nazi analogy, it’s easily inferrable from what he said.** So when American commentators said that Afghanistan was the Soviets’ “Vietnam”, what we could legitimately infer was that the Soviets were trying to defend one half of the country from from the sort of brutal, dictatorial totalitarian regime that obtained in the USSR, China, North Korea, etc.? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/17 "2003-03-29T17:40:57Z")
I’m just waiting for: “Saddam Hussein was found dressed up as a woman and fleeing for Syria.” “Yes, Jim, you might say he met his Waterloo,” ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/18 "2003-03-29T20:10:49Z")
Herman/ The key to Springfield is Main Street. The Romans knew it. The Carthaginians knew it. And now YOU know it." /Herman ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/19 "2003-03-29T20:19:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bryan Ekers \* > … “Whoever said Sunday was a day of rest?” > > Uh… God? You need to post that over in [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=173388) thread. ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2003, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899/20 "2003-03-29T21:20:47Z")
I liked the wounded soldier the other day who said (this is pretty close to a quote), “Getting shot _at_ isn’t so bad, but getting _shot_ sucked.” Of course, I know what he meant, and I doubt that I’d be much more articulate if I’d been shot, doped up, and stuck in front of a bank of TV cameras, but still… that was funny. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-military-analogy-ever/164899.md?page=2)