# Worst movie you've seen this year?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [September 19, 2004, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986 "2004-09-19T13:32:55Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 4
### Author:  [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)
#### Post date: [September 21, 2004, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/61 "2004-09-21T16:52:16Z")
**Guinastasia** , it really is that bad, although if you’re going for the costumes, you may be able to stand it, because the costumes are really lovely.
It’s the worst movie I’ve seen this year, but not far behind it is \Wicker Park.\
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### Author:  [@Scoundrel\_Swanswater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scoundrel_Swanswater)
#### Post date: [September 22, 2004, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/62 "2004-09-22T14:21:03Z")
Another vote for **Van Helsing**. I actually turned it off after about 45 minutes, because my brain started to hurt. What a POS. I have seen videogames with better stories and more believable action-scenes. Actually it was just like the Van Helsing videogame, only less exciting.
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### Author:  [@fusoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fusoya)
#### Post date: [September 22, 2004, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/63 "2004-09-22T14:50:06Z")
This has been quite a horrible year for movies…so far just about every single movie I’ve seen in the theater has been a stinker - Van Helsing, Predator 3, Passion of Christ, Supersize Me (was entertaining, but was more a reality show than a documentary, which disappointed me ) Taking Lives, Harry Potter (wasn’t the worst, but very disappointing considering how much I enjoyed the book), Kill Bill v2, The Hunting of the President, F911…about the only redeemable movie I’ve paid to see this year was Spring Summer Autumn Winter and Spring.
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### Author:  [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2004, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/64 "2004-09-23T05:24:53Z")
It’s not a new movie, but the worst one I’ve seen this year is the bizarrely lauded **The Dark Crystal**. Is this movie better if you’re high? I know it’s not better when you’re young, since I couldn’t sit through it when I was six… I always thought I was missing out never having seen the whole thing. Now I miss the hour and a half of my life I wasted watching this incredibly stupid movie.
**Cold Creek Manor** and **The Perfect Score** sucked too. Of the two CCM sucked really hard, though.
Someone mentioned watching a movie in hopes that it gets better…does **Swiming Pool** ever get any better? We gave up after the daughter wandered around topless waking the author from her nap.
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### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2004, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/65 "2004-09-23T07:32:45Z")
> [@elfkin477](#):
>
> Someone mentioned watching a movie in hopes that it gets better…does **Swiming Pool** ever get any better? We gave up after the daughter wandered around topless waking the author from her nap.
_Nothing_ is better than a topless Ludivine Sagnier.
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### Author:  [@roger\_thornhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roger_thornhill)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2004, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/66 "2004-09-23T07:45:20Z")
Not an Angelina Jolie fan, **Alessan**?
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### Author:  [@Scoundrel\_Swanswater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scoundrel_Swanswater)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2004, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/67 "2004-09-23T07:53:32Z")
By the way, nobody mentioned **Mindhunters**.
That must be one of the worst scripts ever.
It appeared to make sense, but then in the last 15 minutes everything just spun out of control : _he_ did it. No, _he_ did it. That’s what you think, but no : _he_ did it. :smack:
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### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2004, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/68 "2004-09-23T07:57:02Z")
> [@roger thornhill](#):
>
> Not an Angelina Jolie fan, **Alessan**?
I said “_better_”. I didn’t say “as good.”
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### Author:  [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)
#### Post date: [September 23, 2004, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/69 "2004-09-23T10:06:53Z")
I saw **The Lizzie McGuire Movie** inflight from Munich to Atlanta.
The fact that we were at 40,000 feet was the only thing that kept me from walking out.
There was much to hate about this movie, much of which you could guess without ever seeing it. Bad TV sitcom quality acting, unfunny jokes, lousy singing, etc. Here are a few of the less expected bad points:
I’m generally willing to grant a movie its basic premise, but I am not always willing to believe more than one impossible thing before breakfast. I could accept that Lizzie’s 8th grade school graduation trip is to Rome (or maybe not…I know _my_ class just went to the local water park!), _or_ that she is a dead ringer for a pop star named Isabella and is thus called upon to stand in for Isabella at various events. I’m not going to swallow both in the same movie, though.
I sure couldn’t swallow the hotel they were staying at. It was like the freakin’ Ritz, and each kid had a double bed to his/herself and only one roommate.
The surprise (cough, cough) villain of the piece is another pop star, a supposedly dreamy Italian guy who’s the ex-boyfriend/singing parter of Isabella. He’s the one who asks Lizzie to be Isabella’s double, since Isabella has run off somewhere after their breakup. This turns out to be part of his Evil Plan to humiliate Isabella by having a no-talent look-alike teen sing in her place at an award show…a plan that hinges upon his _having_ a no-talent look-alike teen to sing in her place. So was he sitting on this plan until he happened to spot Lizzie by chance just days before the big event, or did he hatch it all the second he spotted her by chance just days before the big event? Either way it’s stupid.
In the end, Lizzie must choose between believing the flattering lies of Mr. Smarmy Italian Pop Star or her pathetically platonic best bud. Isabella herself shows up and tells Lizzie “Who are you going to believe, this guy you just met or your lifelong best friend?” But the friend’s story is based entirely upon what Isabella already told him about her ex and their relationship, so Lizzie’s choice is really which Italian pop star she’s going to believe. She could have complete faith in her friend and still not believe that his account of things is accurate. But the filmmakers apparently expect us not to notice this, perhaps correctly guessing that anyone who’d _want_ to see this movie is an idiot anyway.
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### Author:  [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/70 "2004-09-24T04:42:07Z")
> [@Alessan](#):
>
> _Nothing_ is better than a topless Ludivine Sagnier.
She doesn’t do much for straight women, IMHO. Is that why it’s got a 7 imdb rating though? Good to know, I won’t bother finishing it then.
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### Author:  [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/71 "2004-09-24T05:01:01Z")
> [@Scupper](#):
>
> _ **I, Robot** _ was the worst movie I’ve seen in recent memory. I was frothing with hatred and irritation at how incredibly stupid the plot was.
>
> And I’ve seen \*\*\*Van Helsing, Riddick, Aliens vs. Predator \*\*\* and _ **The Day After Tomorrow** _ (fairly lame but funny, mediocre with nice effects, bad with nice effects, and stupid but sort of entertaining, respectively).
Are you serious? 'Cause I’ve seen all those other movies & liked them. Not like as in Academy Award, but liked 'em for what they were.
I, Robot is worse?? Now that just sucks. I’ll see it on video though. Punisher I’d recommend you not see at all, even on video. Even if Netflix gives you a free coupon. Even if Netflix offers to come to your house and massage your shoulders & rub your feet while watching it.
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### Author:  [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/72 "2004-09-24T05:15:48Z")
Dunno how I forgot this, perhaps I blocked the horror out of my memory, but **Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star** was played during my Greyhound bus ride from Hartford to New York in June. My god, what a loathsome heap of shit that was. Nobody on the entire bus laughed even once. Not even a snicker. The lady sitting next to me changed her kid’s diaper practically in my lap, and you know what? I didn’t care, 'cause nothing could have stunk up the trip worse than that movie. Hey David Spade, face it: Chris Farley’s dead, and you’re not remotely funny without him. Quit making movies like this.
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### Author:  [@buns3000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buns3000)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/73 "2004-09-24T05:24:35Z")
> [@Trunk](#):
>
> Worst that I’ve actively seeked out was probably **Manchurian Candidate** but I’m getting better at avoiding bad movies. I didn’t think it was that bad.
Dude, you blaspheme. I think we need to workshop that idea in a mutually convenient carpark. That is one of my favourite movies of all time.
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### Author:  [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/74 "2004-09-24T10:56:24Z")
> [@buns3000](#):
>
> I think we need to workshop that idea in a mutually convenient carpark.
I would _so_ love to use this in one of my gazillion status meetings.
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### Author:  [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/75 "2004-09-24T12:44:22Z")
Gotta be **The Rundown**
yawn…
I’m getting bored just mentioning it
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### Author:  [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/76 "2004-09-24T13:30:39Z")
> [@elfkin477](#):
>
> She doesn’t do much for straight women, IMHO.
Then just wait until you meet the gardener!
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### Author:  [@waits](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waits)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/77 "2004-09-24T14:06:00Z")
No offense, but you’re all a bunch of pikers.
I sat through _Yu-Gi-Oh: The Movie_.
What we parents won’t do for our children…
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### Author:  [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/78 "2004-09-24T17:17:32Z")
> [@waits](#):
>
> No offense, but you’re all a bunch of pikers.
>
> I sat through _Yu-Gi-Oh: The Movie_.
>
> What we parents won’t do for our children…
Luckily my son has avoided Yu-GI-Oh. He sees it as a threat to his beloved pokemon. Of course, I have had to sit through EVERY pokemon movie, but none this year so it doesn’t count.
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### Author:  [@DarkTrickLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkTrickLady)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/79 "2004-09-24T17:47:34Z")
> [@Nightwatch Trailer](#):
>
> _The Village_. Not only the worst movie I’ve seen this year, possibly the worst movie I’ve ever paid to see in a theater.
That’s the one! Steaming pile of …
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### Author:  [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)
#### Post date: [September 24, 2004, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movie-youve-seen-this-year/264986/80 "2004-09-24T18:08:31Z")
If this is the best you guys can come up with, then I have to assume that I’m the only doper stupid enough to have sat through The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. There are just not enough Os in stoooopid to describe this movie. I can deal with suspension of disbelief. What I cannot abide is layer upon layer of implausibility.
Such as the 100 foot tall, 500 foot long submarine navigating – get this – the canals of Venice.
Or the villain’s brand new evil fortress, built in a week, complete with cobwebs and long forgotten secret chambers.
But my favorite bit was when Sean Connery was going to shoot a faraway foe, and paused to put on his glasses – then looked over the rims when he aimed.
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