# "Worst" movies of the 80s **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 30, 2008, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147 "2008-05-30T15:02:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![woodstockbirdybird](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/woodstockbirdybird/32/7905_2.png) [@woodstockbirdybird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/woodstockbirdybird)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/21 "2008-05-30T18:58:02Z")
[QUOTE=Marley23] \*The Last Dragon \* merits consideration, I think. There’s a pop star in the cast as the love interest (Vanity), and even better, a non-actor in the lead! (Taimak as “Bruce” Leroy Green.) I don’t know if you’d call Sho’Nuff’s gang punks, but they’re close enough. I remember some crummy music and haircuts, especially on Vanity. [/QUOTE] Let us not forget, in addition to vanity, there was plenty of DeBarge on the soundtrack. This was actually the first DVD I bought after getting a player, because I thought it was hilarious when I was 15. Needless to say, it didn’t hold up. At all. ---
**Author:** ![BMax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bmax/32/4267_2.png) [@BMax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMax)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/22 "2008-05-30T19:01:33Z")
**Labyrinth.** Another David Bowie (big hair & spandex) vehicle, this time with jailbait Jennifer Conelly in the lead. I don’t think she wears leg warmers, but she has 80’s high-waist jeans with a big mens’ dress shirt-type top. There are a couple music videos in it, most of the cast is muppets. Ends with her realizing that she had the magic power all along, or something equally sappy. I don’t know what Bowie stuffed his spandex with either, but it shouldn’t have been in a children’s movie. **Short Circuit**. Another Steve Gutenberg vehicle. A military robot gets struck by lightning & gets amnesia. Meets pretty girl, wackiness ensues. I won’t waste any more synaptic space remembering this piece of fluff. This kind of shit gives us decent peaceniks a bad name. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/23 "2008-05-30T19:05:05Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] Red Dawn [/QUOTE] I was going to mention that in the OP, and forgot. But I think it was bad on a level that transcends any one decade. What makes it particulary 80s-worthy is the use of brat packers, commies, and Lea Thompson. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/24 "2008-05-30T19:08:32Z")
[QUOTE=BMax] **Short Circuit**. [/QUOTE] It was that movie that made me realize that Alli Sheedy was not, in fact, a brilliant actress who made wise career moves. The Breakfast Club lied to us, man! ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/25 "2008-05-30T19:13:25Z")
[QUOTE=BMax] **Labyrinth.** Another David Bowie (big hair & spandex) vehicle, this time with jailbait Jennifer Conelly in the lead. I don’t think she wears leg warmers, but she has 80’s high-waist jeans with a big mens’ dress shirt-type top. There are a couple music videos in it, most of the cast is muppets. Ends with her realizing that she had the magic power all along, or something equally sappy. I don’t know what Bowie stuffed his spandex with either, but it shouldn’t have been in a children’s movie. [/QUOTE] You must be confused, Labyrinth is awesome. Dance magic dance! ---
**Author:** ![Alma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Alma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alma)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/26 "2008-05-30T19:16:02Z")
[QUOTE=The New and Improved Superman] featuring “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds, a bad 80s flashback if ever there was one. [/QUOTE] I believe it was by Bauhaus. Nick Cave is still going strong. ---
**Author:** ![Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laughing_Lagomorph)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/27 "2008-05-30T19:27:48Z")
I mercifully don’t remember much of it but I suspect the movie _Valley Girl_ would fulfill a lot of the OP’s requirements. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Some\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ad7895/32.png) [@Just\_Some\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Some_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/28 "2008-05-30T20:28:45Z")
I get to be the first one to say _Megaforce_? It’s about a secret paramilitary group with lasers and flying motorcycles that overthrows middle eastern governments. And they’re the good guys. There was a fairly big marketing push when the film was coming out. Needless to say it was a major bomb. ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/29 "2008-05-30T20:42:46Z")
**Against All Odds:** Rachel Ward in that perm and trashy rich girl attire. Jeff Bridges in the button down shirt and light trousers bought from the same store that half the leading men in 80’s films seemed compelled to go shopping in. It had smarmy lawyers and cocaine in the bathroom, and evil yuppies harming the environment. It featured the glitzy 80’s style nightclub complete with that stupid fucking gig by King Creole and the Coconuts, and to top it all off, Phil Collins sang the title song. I bought that DVD in the bargain bin at the supermarket, and I’m _still_ pissed at myself. ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/30 "2008-05-30T21:15:30Z")
Y’all are forgettining **Cocktail**. Our hero is a smug bartender for whooping yuppies! And he tosses bottles behind his back! And he’s mentored by an older, wiser bottletosser! He learns valuable life lessons! And he gets the girl! And - um, well, that’s it, really. Flashy, vacuous, and shallow as a birdbath: makes **Police Academy** look like **The Cherry Orchard.** Of course, no mention of trashy 80’s bar movies would be complete without the Filmed In Glorious Mullet-O-Vision epic that was [Road House](http://www.agonybooth.com/recaps/Road_House_1989.aspx). Bonus 80’s points for Patrick Swayze! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/31 "2008-05-30T21:17:54Z")
[QUOTE=SaharaTea] The correct answer is **Howard the Duck**. [/QUOTE] How could they **not** have cast Rodney Dangerfield to do Howard’s voice?! ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/32 "2008-05-30T21:23:12Z")
[QUOTE=Scissorjack] Of course, no mention of trashy 80’s bar movies would be complete without the Filmed In Glorious Mullet-O-Vision epic that was [Road House](http://www.agonybooth.com/recaps/Road_House_1989.aspx). Bonus 80’s points for Patrick Swayze! [/QUOTE] Hey, they made a sequal, so someone must have liked it! And Roadhouse has a commentary by Kevin Smith! I nominate Killer Klowns from Outer Space. It was very bad not good! Also Goonies, which I never really liked. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/33 "2008-05-30T21:35:00Z")
Meatballs II Caddyshack 2 ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/34 "2008-05-30T21:37:54Z")
[QUOTE=Cluricaun] Teen Wolf Too. Hey, we got the fat guy back from the first one, green light this mother! [/QUOTE] This is what I came to say. There’s no _movie_ there. It’s just Jason Bateman being pretty and some random clips of stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/35 "2008-05-30T22:48:24Z")
I don’t know if _Get Crazy_ fits here – it’s B comedy, so maybe that’s not fair. It’s “bad,” but not pretentious. Big hair? Check. Pop stars cast? Check. (Lou Reed, no less.) It uses the quintessential 80s plot. Notably, Malcolm MacDowell plays a lampoon of Mick Jagger, pegged as a pathetic oldy clinging to a rock-n-roll lifestyle. (Who would have guessed that Mick hadn’t yet reached the _midway point_ of his career?) Although it has over-the-top cheese elements, it’s so bad it’s good in some ways. (In 1991 I had a custom-made “Electric Larry” t-shirt as a gift, which I wore with pride. It made sense at the time.) One thing for sure: _Get Crazy_ is about the 80sist movie ever made. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/36 "2008-05-30T22:55:50Z")
…missed the edit window: [Electric Larry](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecTysANZqAo) - Eightieslicious. ---
**Author:** ![postcards](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e8cbc/32.png) [@postcards](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/postcards)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/37 "2008-05-30T23:28:16Z")
36 posts and no mention of _ **Desperately Seeking Susan** _? ---
**Author:** ![Talon\_Karrde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Talon\_Karrde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Talon_Karrde)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/38 "2008-05-30T23:38:06Z")
[QUOTE=Alma] I believe it was by Bauhaus. Nick Cave is still going strong. [/QUOTE] That is correct, although Bauhaus just released an album also. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/39 "2008-05-30T23:53:54Z")
[QUOTE=lieu] Red Dawn [/QUOTE] I was going to mention that except it kicks ass. No mention of **St Elmo’s Fire**? Oh…Zebra mentioned it in the second post. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2008, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147/40 "2008-05-31T00:06:48Z")
For me St Elmo’s Fire gets a pass because some of it was filmed at the University of Maryland right before I got there. I can still look at the movie and say, “I remember that Frat! Look, its the chapel!” It was supposed to be Georgetown but Georgetown would not let them film there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-movies-of-the-80s/451147.md?page=3)