# Worst possible band names **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 2, 2006, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025 "2006-10-02T19:34:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/121 "2006-10-11T17:57:15Z")
[QUOTE=Jet Jaguar] Dead Amish Schoolgirls [/QUOTE] There was a Florida band awhile back while it was still in the news called the Dead German Tourists. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/122 "2006-10-11T18:17:33Z")
[QUOTE=Jet Jaguar] Some of these band names are pretty good, actually. I think the worst names would fall into one of three categories: **Names that would be confusing on a marquee** Closed for Renovation Welcome Pipefitters Local 182 Hospitality Industry Career Expo Langley - Collins Wedding Collegiate Battle of the Minds [/QUOTE] See also: Show Cancelled Phone For Details Under-18s Night: Free Beer ---
**Author:** ![Jet\_Jaguar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jet_jaguar/32/3562_2.png) [@Jet\_Jaguar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jet_Jaguar)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/123 "2006-10-11T23:26:14Z")
[QUOTE=Ludovic] There was a Florida band awhile back while it was still in the news called the Dead German Tourists. [/QUOTE] Yeah, that’s where I got the idea for that one, actually. I was going to school down here in Florida when all that was happening. ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/124 "2006-10-12T08:11:55Z")
[QUOTE=Cemetery Savior] Along the lines of **aclubs** [ul] [li]Closed[/li][li]For Rent[/li][li]Free Soup[/li][li]All Ages Show[/li][li]There is no Band[/li][/ul] [/QUOTE] In the same spirit of “four-wall clubs”\* [ul] [li]No place to sit down[/li][li]No place to put your drink[/li][li]No place to put your jacket[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/125 "2006-10-12T08:49:08Z")
**Your ASS is the band** ---
**Author:** ![bundykala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@bundykala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bundykala)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2006, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/126 "2006-10-21T01:17:55Z")
[Hedgeclipper](http://xkcd.com/c119.html) ---
**Author:** ![Runs\_With\_Scissors](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/278dde/32.png) [@Runs\_With\_Scissors](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runs_With_Scissors)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2006, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/127 "2006-10-21T03:38:02Z")
[QUOTE=RealityChuck] Well, there isn’t anything that wouldn’t make a good band name, depending on the band. Something like “Beverly’s Crotch Hair in my Soup” might work for a punk band, but would be a horrible choice for a country band. [/QUOTE] OMFG, I can’t stop laughing! ---
**Author:** ![Boulter\_s\_Canary](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Boulter\_s\_Canary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boulter_s_Canary)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/128 "2006-10-22T21:47:25Z")
**Chocolate Owls** **Dead Cat Bounce** **Good Enough for Folk Music** ---
**Author:** ![Hogwash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e57/32.png) [@Hogwash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hogwash)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/129 "2006-10-22T22:05:32Z")
Clown Erection ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2006, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/130 "2006-10-22T22:13:42Z")
**Baby Crusher Bus Station Buttfunk Ann Coulter’s Micropenis The Orthodox Jewish Freak Show** ---
**Author:** ![Wnabtokio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Wnabtokio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wnabtokio)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/131 "2006-10-23T17:25:31Z")
[QUOTE=Cluricaun] I forgot to add my own: Dr. Touch Too Much and the Regular Checkups. [/QUOTE] Are you kidding me?! That’s a great name. But, as has been said, it wouldn’t be good for just any band. ---
**Author:** ![Wnabtokio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b487fb/32.png) [@Wnabtokio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wnabtokio)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2006, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025/132 "2006-10-23T17:43:42Z")
[QUOTE=erie774] Pediatric Oncology and the Quiet Christmas (I am so going to hell for that) [/QUOTE] I’ll be backseat driving with you! I’ve got to stop laughing out loud at these. The nice old ladies at my work are going to ask why, and if I explain they’re just going to think I’m even weirder. How about: **No Band Tonight Hitler’s Missing Testicle Talentless Hacks** Or, for Christian music only, \*\*I Found God and Lost My Talent \*\* (shamelessly stolen from P.J. O’Rourke) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-possible-band-names/375025.md?page=6)