# Worst remakes ever!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [May 28, 2009, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949 "2009-05-28T17:53:15Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 3
### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/41 "2009-05-29T13:41:49Z")
The 1976 **King Kong**
(And I’ll head off further comment – although I know it has plenty of enemies on this Board, I _loved_ Peter Jackson’s version)
**The Day the Earth Stood Still** – I’ve already commented on this at considerable length. But, just to cite one feature, it’s bizarre that Gort looks even _less_ believable in the remake.
**a Man for All Seasons** – well, maybe not the worst, with all that talent (Charlton Heston, John Gielgud, and Vanessa Redgrave back as the only one from the original, now with a meatier role), but the most pointless remake until the one of **Psycho**. Why remake what was already perfect?
**The Absent-Minded Professor** – Disney remade it _twice_ – once with Harry Anderson on TV, once with Robin Williams to show off theit CGI. Why?
**Sleuth** – I know the remake is considered much better, with Harold Pinter rewriting “hack” Anthony Schaffer’s work, but I prefer the Hack, myself. At least he’s quotable. The remake is pretentious.
I’ll disagree that all remakes are bad. The classic counterexample being **The Maltese Falcon** – Huston’s version is the third one, and it blows its predecessors out of the water. **The Wizard of Oz** is another example – Larry Semon’s silent version is a curiosity (Oliver Hardy as the Tin Man!) and Baum’s own silent versions are weird little things.
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### Author:  [@kelly5078](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kelly5078)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/42 "2009-05-29T15:27:21Z")
> [@Estilicon](#):
>
> Stephen King is a hack, except for “Salem´s Lot”; Kubrick was a hack with no saving grace (and yes, I hold him responsable for AI too).
King one could debate, I suppose, if one had the time. But when you throw in Kubrick, I’d have to say that you have an unusual definition of the word “hack.”
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### Author:  [@SunSandSuffering](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunSandSuffering)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/43 "2009-05-29T15:40:16Z")
Bad remakes:
2000 (Stallone) version of **Get Carter**
2003 version of **The Italian Job**
2004 version of **The Manchurian Candidate**
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### Author:  [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/44 "2009-05-29T15:56:08Z")
> [@SunSandSuffering](#):
>
> Bad remakes:
>
> 2000 (Stallone) version of **Get Carter**
> 2003 version of **The Italian Job**
> 2004 version of **The Manchurian Candidate**
I’ll admit I kind of liked the re-made Manchurian Candidate.
In the interest of furthering everyone’s disgust with me, I’ll also admit to enjoying the re-made song **Fortunate Son** done by Wyclef Jean which played during the opening credits.
Damned shame I cannot find that tune on iTunes.
Oh well, de gustibus non est disputandum.
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### Author:  [@TheMerchandise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheMerchandise)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/45 "2009-05-29T16:19:21Z")
**Breathless** , remade in 1983 with Richard Gere. Unspeakably terrible.
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/46 "2009-05-29T16:40:23Z")
> [@beowulff](#):
>
> It’s with great trepidation that I wait for the remake of _The Taking of Pelham 123_.
I can’t figure out why the hell they kept that title.
Not a remake, exactly, but _Pearl Harbor_ was every bit as bad as _Tora! Tora! Tora!_ was good. Still the worst film I’ve ever seen.
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### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/47 "2009-05-29T19:51:00Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> Not a remake, exactly, but _Pearl Harbor_ was every bit as bad as _Tora! Tora! Tora!_ was good. Still the worst film I’ve ever seen.
If the romantic triangle in _Pearl Harbor_ had been omitted, I daresay it would have been an okay film (and about 45 minutes shorter). FDR saying he has no time for bullshit? Cool!
We still would have the fictional pilots who were at both PH and on Doolittle’s Raid, but so be it.
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### Author:  [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/48 "2009-05-29T20:27:56Z")
_I Am Legend_, Remake of _The Omega Man_
\*Godzilla (200?) \*Remake of _Godzilla (1964)_
\*The Lion King \*Remake of \*Kimba the White Lion \*(yeah, I said it)
_Speed Racer_
_The Flintstones_
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### Author:  [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/49 "2009-05-29T20:30:28Z")
> [@TheMerchandise](#):
>
> **Breathless** , remade in 1983 with Richard Gere. Unspeakably terrible.
:o I love that movie.
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/50 "2009-05-29T20:45:50Z")
> [@ministryman](#):
>
> \*The Lion King \*Remake of \*Kimba the White Lion \*(yeah, I said it)
I think Tezuka sama would’ve been enamored with The Lion King.
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [May 29, 2009, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/51 "2009-05-29T21:27:24Z")
> [@](#):
>
> I Am Legend, Remake of The Omega Man
Which, in turn, is a remake of **The Last Man on Earth** , starring Vincent Price. All of them are supposedly based on Richard Matheson’s novel “I Am Legend”, but none of them is really faithful to it. Arguably the Price version comes closest, but the recent Will Smith version is more watchable. One o’ these days I’d like to see it (like I’d like to see so much SF literature) filmed straight.
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### Author:  [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/52 "2009-05-30T03:26:23Z")
> [@Neatness\_Counts](#):
>
> How were the endings mishandled in the remakes? The ending of neither the book, radio play nor two major movies deviates much, if at all.
The 3rd remake has the hero shooting an injection into a martian. That deviates far from the idea that they did not have natural defenses to our germs.
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### Author:  [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/53 "2009-05-30T03:51:03Z")
> [@detop](#):
>
> I have to disagree with that assessment. The remake **was** scarier **and** more faithful to the original story. It is an improvement.
Judging whether a remake was better means you compare the movies. The story is irrelevant.
The original had a scene in the beginning where they kind of see the craft under the ice. To get an idea of the shape of it they all stand around the edge of it. Then they realize it is round and they have a flying saucer under them. A cool movie moment.
The original was terrifying ,but then I was about 8 when I saw it the first time.
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/54 "2009-05-30T15:48:35Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#):
>
> If the romantic triangle in _Pearl Harbor_ had been omitted, I daresay it would have been an okay film (and about 45 minutes shorter). FDR saying he has no time for bullshit? Cool!
>
> We still would have the fictional pilots who were at both PH and on Doolittle’s Raid, but so be it.
It would still have had (cook’s assistant) Cuba Gooding, Jr. and (greenhorn pilots) Josh Hartnett and Ben Affleck shooting down an entire Japanese Navy air wing by themselves.
And the **worst speeches ever given on film** by whichever Baldwin was in it.
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/55 "2009-05-30T16:10:52Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> It would still have had (cook’s assistant) Cuba Gooding, Jr. and (greenhorn pilots) Josh Hartnett and Ben Affleck shooting down an entire Japanese Navy air wing by themselves.
So? That’s _cool._ Like the new kid in the rebel alliance destroying the Death Star almost single-handedly. It’s entertainment for god’s sake, not an encyclopedia.
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### Author:  [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/56 "2009-05-30T16:16:02Z")
> [@gonzomax](#):
>
> Judging whether a remake was better means you compare the movies. The story is irrelevant.
> \
Actually, the story **is** relevant. If it is closer to the source material, if it respects more the intent of the original creator, **then** the remake is superior to the original film.
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### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/57 "2009-05-30T16:48:12Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> It would still have had (cook’s assistant) Cuba Gooding, Jr.
I made the mistake of assuming Gooding’s character was entirely fictional and a sop to modern-day political correctness.
[I was wrong.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dorie_Miller) I don’t know if Dorie Miller actually shot down any planes, but I think Gooding needed a bigger part.
And Ben Affleck needs acting school.
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/58 "2009-05-30T19:21:21Z")
He was terrible in that film . . .
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### Author:  [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2009, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/59 "2009-05-30T23:25:08Z")
I heard a rumor about a remake of _Rosemary’s Baby_- better be a lie… :mad:
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### Author:  [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)
#### Post date: [June 18, 2009, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-remakes-ever/497949/60 "2009-06-18T04:33:55Z")
> [@beowulff](#):
>
> It’s with great trepidation that I wait for the remake of _The Taking of Pelham 123_.
>
> I saw the preview a month ago, and I knew what they were doing in the first second of the trailer. I couldn’t believe that they were doing a remake - the original was so great.
>
> I’m sure it’s going to suck.
More or less. Yup.
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