# Worst rock&roll lyrics? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 19, 2004, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918 "2004-04-19T23:21:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![buns3000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c89c15/32.png) [@buns3000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buns3000)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/61 "2004-04-21T02:24:50Z")
> [@askeptic](#): > > Can’t resist, Buns3000, how well do you sing in Japanese? Not very well. Whats your point? I always cringe when I hear the following from Toto’s _Africa_: _Sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti_ ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/62 "2004-04-21T02:44:18Z")
Does anybody really know what time it is? ---
**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/63 "2004-04-21T02:50:41Z")
> [@Sample\_the\_Dog](#): > > Does anybody really know what time it is? _Does anbody really care?_ ---
**Author:** ![Lando\_Griffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f17d59/32.png) [@Lando\_Griffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lando_Griffin)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/64 "2004-04-21T02:56:21Z")
Does anybody really care? 😃 Relax, ‘We’ve all got time enough to die’ ---
**Author:** ![Lando\_Griffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f17d59/32.png) [@Lando\_Griffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lando_Griffin)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/65 "2004-04-21T02:58:28Z")
G-d D@mn Mother-F$(K!N( slow load times! Now my unoriginal, poinless post is even more pointless ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Wumpus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8c91f0/32.png) [@Wumpus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wumpus)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/66 "2004-04-21T03:01:00Z")
"Umm, that line is not by Led Zep, it is by Robert Johnson, the master himself. Shame on you! " Er, actually it’s not really original to Robert Johnson, either. By the time Johnson recorded Traveling Riverside Blues, there are were already a bunch of lemon-squeezing blues songs out there. (A quick trip trip to AMG pegs Roosevelt Sykes, Blind Boy Fuller, and Charlie Pickett at least.) It’s just one of those common idioms that makes the blues so colorful. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/67 "2004-04-21T03:09:21Z")
> [@Lando Griffin](#): > > G-d D@mn Mother-F$(K!N( slow load times! Now my unoriginal, poinless post is even more pointless ☹ Thats okay… I misspelled Anybody :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/68 "2004-04-21T03:38:01Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Ooo-eee baby, Steve Miller could really crank out the bad lyrics. > > _“Some people call me Maurice > Cause I speak of the pompitous of love”_ > > Some people wish they had a remote vaporization switch every time this comes on the radio. It’s not Steve Miller’s line and there’s a lot more history to it than you think. [Cecil speaks](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a4_065.html). ---
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/69 "2004-04-21T04:09:09Z")
I think “we walked in the garden, we planted a tree” in Heart’s “All I Wanna Do Is Make Love to You” may in fact be the worst metaphor for sex ever. Of course, it might also be disqualified under **Quercus** ’ axiom that to be truly bad lyrics have to go with good music, because the song as a whole is truly wretched. Also, Eric Clapton’s “Wonderful Tonight” is highly amusing in ways that it probably was not intended to be. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/70 "2004-04-21T04:25:27Z")
\ Ahem. The…_Tubes_: \*\* Step right up and don’t be shy Because you will not believe your eyes She’s right here, behind the glass You’re gonna like her, 'cause she’s got class You can look inside another world You get to talk to a pretty girl She’s everything you dream about… But don’t fall in love She’s a beauty She’s one in a million girls She’s a beauty Why would I lie Why would I lie?\*\* Well, I might lie if somebody asked me if I was responsible for that horrifically bad lyric. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/71 "2004-04-21T04:32:48Z")
Maybe not the worst, but the stupidest: The Turtles - Happy Together Me and you and you and me No matter how they toss the dice It had to be The only one for me is you And you for me So happy together So happy together How is the weather So happy together "How is the weather?? WTF!? ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/72 "2004-04-21T04:38:31Z")
I see your hair is burning. Hills are filled with fire. If they say I never loved you you know they are a liar. ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/73 "2004-04-21T04:40:05Z")
> [@KarlGauss](#): > > The only one for me is you > And you for me These are the lines that get me. They mean the same frickin thing! ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/74 "2004-04-21T04:57:53Z")
I love the song, really, but The White Stripes’ Hardest Button to Button has soom doozies: My favourite: We started living in an old house My ma gave birth and we were checking it out It was a baby boy So we bought him a toy It was a ray gun And it was 1981 But [The whole song](http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Hardest-Button-To-Button-lyrics-The-White-Stripes/A415CC4B7A1B676F48256D48001667E0) is full of some really goofy lyrics. Jack actually manages to not sound…uhm…dumb singing this stuff, but taking it out of the context of the song. Hoo boy. Speaking of the White Stripes, Fell in Love With a Girl has the really…strange lines: Red hair with a curl mellow roll for the flavor and the eyes were peeping Jack, Meg…I love you guys…perhaps even more because of this…stuff. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/75 "2004-04-21T05:14:19Z")
How can there be any question? The worst lyric of all time, from Train’s “Drops of Jupiter”: > [@](#): > > Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken > Your best friend always stickin > Up for you even when I know you’re wrong If the randomly inserted “Deep fried chicken” isn’t the worst forced rhyme in music history, you tell me what is. ---
**Author:** ![Quint](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/76d3ee/32.png) [@Quint](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quint)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/76 "2004-04-21T05:19:12Z")
I have three to nominate. From AC/DC’s “Touch too Much”: "She had the face of an angel smilin’ with sin, **The body of Venus… with arms!** From Kiss (can’t recall the song title): “Let’s put the x in sex, Love is like a muscle and you make me want to flex!” And from the immortal Annie Lennox in “Talkin to an Angel”: “I walk into an empty room, And suddenly my heart goes boom.” The delivery doesn’t help this one either. Stinkers all! ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/77 "2004-04-21T05:23:46Z")
> [@Tengu](#): > > I love the song, really, but The White Stripes’ Hardest Button to Button has soom doozies. One of the few punk songs that _deserves_ to have been written in the 70’s. I’m a real punk snob, but I’m willing to forgive Jack White just about anything because he wrote this: _I had opinions That didnt matter. I had a brain That felt like pancake batter._ If that ain’t classic punk, I don’t know what is. Now, if he’d only stop trying to pretend he’s a Brit (“the hardest bu’on to bu’on”). ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/78 "2004-04-21T05:28:42Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > If the randomly inserted “Deep fried chicken” isn’t the worst forced rhyme in music history, you tell me what is. I won’t dispute that, but don’t forget Queen’s “One Vision”, which endeth thusly: One one one one… One vision… One flesh one bone One true religion One voice one hope One real decision Gimme one light Gimme one hope Just gimme One man one man One bar one night One day hey hey Just gimme gimme gimme gimme Fried chicken ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/79 "2004-04-21T05:33:37Z")
And while we’re on the topic of random lines and endings, here’s this from John Prine’s “Illegal Smile” (brilliant song from a brillant man) before I join Sample\_the\_Bitch (smile when you say that) in bed for some obviously much needed sleep: Won’t you please tell the man I didn’t kill anyone. I’m just trying to have me some fun. Well done. Hot dog bun. My sister’s a nun. ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2004, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918/80 "2004-04-21T05:36:06Z")
> [@Sample\_the\_Dog](#): > > One of the few punk songs that _deserves_ to have been written in the 70’s. Sorry, meant to write “one of the few 21st century punk songs”. To bed… :o [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-rock-roll-lyrics/240918.md?page=5)