# Worst single lines of dialogue from artistic works **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 18, 2023, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002 "2023-02-18T19:04:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![alovem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@alovem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alovem)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2023, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/1 "2023-02-18T19:04:03Z")
I turned on the TV just in time to catch this awful line of dialogue from the 1965 film Genghis Kahn: _If I were free from this yoke, my hands would still your jackal breath forever!_ I was dumbfounded. Didn’t know whether to laugh or groan, so I did both. Whaddya got? ---
**Author:** ![Maserschmidt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maserschmidt/32/18829_2.png) [@Maserschmidt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maserschmidt)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2023, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/2 "2023-02-18T19:15:30Z")
> [@alovem](#): > > If I were free from this yoke, my hands would still your jackal breath forever! That’s a GREAT line, and it’s _steal_, not _still_. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2023, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/3 "2023-02-18T19:19:48Z")
I’ll see your _ **Genghis Khan** _ and raise you _ **The Conqueror** _: > **[The Conqueror (1956) - IMDb](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0049092/)** > > The Conqueror: Directed by Dick Powell. With John Wayne, Susan Hayward, Pedro Armendáriz, Agnes Moorehead. Mongol chief Temujin battles against Tartar armies and for the love of the Tartar princess Bortai. Temujin becomes the emperor Genghis Khan. _I feel this Tartar woman is for me, and my blood says, take her. There are moments for wisdom and moments when I listen to my blood; my blood says, take this Tartar woman._ ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2023, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/4 "2023-02-18T19:30:05Z")
From the Star Wars prequel, _Attack of the Clones_: Anakin: “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth.” This was in a romantic scene between Anakin and Padme, and an example of the fact that while George Lucas was an incredible creator of ideas, he had no idea how to write lines for actual human beings to deliver. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2023, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/5 "2023-02-18T20:07:03Z")
@terentii’s comment in this other thread is a decent start: > [@Lee Majors in "The Last Chase". what a hoot!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/lee-majors-in-the-last-chase-what-a-hoot/980000/4): > > Is it as good as this movie? smirk “There are many vines here. I shall name this land Vineland.”\* \*To the best of my recollection. Actually I’d bet both movies cited in that thread so far will have some real stinkers. Switching gears … I suppose it’s not fair to include lines from pornos in a competition like this. That’d be like shooting fish in a barrel. ---
**Author:** ![zbuzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@zbuzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zbuzz)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 10:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/6 "2023-02-19T10:09:56Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > while George Lucas was an incredible creator of ideas, he had no idea how to write lines for actual human beings to deliver. NOOOOOO! ---
**Author:** ![zbuzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@zbuzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zbuzz)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/7 "2023-02-19T10:12:22Z")
X-Men, Storm to Toad “Do you know what happens to a toad when it’s struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.” Ugh. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/8 "2023-02-19T11:02:11Z")
Ryan O’Neal’s delivery of “OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD” from _Tough Guys Don’t Dance_ has got to be up there. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/i3fqR0yuWoU/hqdefault.jpg "Tough Guys Don't Dance - Oh Man, Oh God (from DVD)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3fqR0yuWoU) ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/9 "2023-02-19T11:23:57Z")
> [@Maserschmidt](#): > > That’s a GREAT line, and it’s _steal_, not _still_. I don’t know what the dialogue was as written but I think “still” works better, as in, if his hands were free he’d strangle him. Anyhow, the line that always jumps to my mind is from Four Weddings and a Funeral, Andie MacDowell saying “Is it still raining? I hadn’t noticed” It could be just a slip from Mr. Curtis or it could be the delivery from well-known charisma-vaccuum MacDowell. Could be a bit of both. ---
**Author:** ![iamatractorboy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iamatractorboy/32/21261_2.png) [@iamatractorboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamatractorboy)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/10 "2023-02-19T11:47:26Z")
Warning: NSFW (naughty language and subject) [Samurai Cop](https://youtu.be/esqWnUWgziA) I’m not sure this film qualifies as an ‘artistic work’, but it’s too good (bad) not to include. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/11 "2023-02-19T12:18:37Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Ryan O’Neal’s delivery of “OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD” from _Tough Guys Don’t Dance_ has got to be up there. Written and directed by Norman Mailer. ---
**Author:** ![nicky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f0a364/32.png) [@nicky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nicky)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/12 "2023-02-19T12:29:49Z")
Denzel Washington in Philadelphia “ Ive brought some cheese “ We sniggered and admitted with relief that this oscar fooling film was actually a bit crap ---
**Author:** ![alovem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@alovem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alovem)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/13 "2023-02-19T12:58:46Z")
> [@iamatractorboy](#): > > I’m not sure this film qualifies as an ‘artistic work’,… Anything’s fine. I started to title the thread “_…from books, plays, film, TV…_” and ended up shortening it to “_…from artistic works_.” As long as I’m here, awful dialogue is what I’m after, not bad acting. For example, in Point Break, Keanu Reeves’ delivery of “_That’s how it’s gotta be!_” sounds wooden and dumb, but it’s not really an awful line. Once in a while, I’ll see a film or something that’s actually good but will have an awful line or two. But anyone can post anything they like, as long as they make an actual contribution. @Maserschmidt, maybe there’s a film or something you can mention here. A comic book, maybe? ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/14 "2023-02-19T13:00:11Z")
> [@alovem](#): > > A comic book, maybe? [![](https://preview.redd.it/evia08c9fmr51.jpg?width=454&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5dab9e9c6ac6cd4799447913ce023723874cdc2f) ](https://preview.redd.it/evia08c9fmr51.jpg?width=454&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5dab9e9c6ac6cd4799447913ce023723874cdc2f) ---
**Author:** ![up2eleven](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/up2eleven/32/13432_2.png) [@up2eleven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/up2eleven)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/15 "2023-02-19T13:04:57Z")
“Because you can’t win, Rock! This guy will kill ya to death inside of three rounds!” - Burgess Meredith in Rocky 3 Man, imagine being killed to death. ---
**Author:** ![alovem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@alovem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alovem)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/16 "2023-02-19T13:06:05Z")
Heh-heh, that **is** pretty awful! 😆 ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/17 "2023-02-19T13:37:03Z")
Shakespearean actor Richard Burton as Father Lamont in _Exorcist II: The Heretic_: “Pazuzu, king of the evil spirits of the air, help me to find Kokumo!” Apparently audiences convulsed in laughter at seeing Burton brought down to this line. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/18 "2023-02-19T14:31:19Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > …while George Lucas was an incredible creator of ideas, he had no idea how to write lines for actual human beings to deliver. Harrison Ford famously said of the screenplay for the original “George, you can type this shit, but you can’t say it.” ---
**Author:** ![iamatractorboy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iamatractorboy/32/21261_2.png) [@iamatractorboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamatractorboy)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/19 "2023-02-19T14:32:35Z")
[Quality film, not so quality line](https://youtu.be/m1S4_tt40iI) ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2023, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002/20 "2023-02-19T14:42:45Z")
In an old Popeye cartoon, Olive Oyl was afraid Swee’ Pea would be killed to death… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-single-lines-of-dialogue-from-artistic-works/980002.md?page=2)