# Worst soccer dive leads to best soccer announcing! **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [November 5, 2009, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372 "2009-11-05T01:50:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/1 "2009-11-05T01:50:14Z")
I was perusing the [“Why is it hard to score at soccer?”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=538653) thread and it reminded me (Mundanely and Pointlessly) of a video clip of “the worst soccer dive ever”. It’s a [fun clip](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kggmARak8cA) for two reasons: 1. The dive is truly awful… 2. …and it led to some very funny commentary from the British announcer. Including… \*“Oh! Gilardino went down almost posthumously!” “Fine there, and suddenly, a swallow-dive. Fully deserves censure, if not ridicule. That’s disgraceful, really.”\* Hilarious, if only to me. But then this \*is \*MPSIMS, isn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![Bookkeeper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bookkeeper/32/281_2.png) [@Bookkeeper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bookkeeper)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/2 "2009-11-05T04:51:11Z")
I thought it was funny also, in a very British way. ---
**Author:** ![ducati](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cc9497/32.png) [@ducati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ducati)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/3 "2009-11-05T05:03:57Z")
I’m American. I don’t get it. Is he trying to imply that he was tripped up by the other guy? Is faking a fall to get someone penalized an offence itself? How does anyone get excited about this? ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/4 "2009-11-05T05:18:08Z")
> [@ducati](#): > > I’m American. > > I don’t get it. > > Is he trying to imply that he was tripped up by the other guy? > Is faking a fall to get someone penalized an offence itself? > > How does anyone get excited about this? Yes. Yes. About diving? They don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/5 "2009-11-05T05:42:00Z")
> [@ducati](#): > > Is faking a fall to get someone penalized an offence itself? It is a custom more honor’d in the breach than in the observance. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/6 "2009-11-05T14:54:48Z")
Mundane and pointless … and sports-related. I’m going to kick this over to the Game Room. twickster, MPSIMS moderator ---
**Author:** ![Wakinyan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wakinyan/32/352_2.png) [@Wakinyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wakinyan)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/7 "2009-11-05T15:35:18Z")
Brilliant clip, thanks for sharing. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/8 "2009-11-05T17:51:53Z")
I wish flopping was punished a lot harsher in both soccer and basketball, some of those guys should be doing shakespeare not playing sports. ---
**Author:** ![MJinks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/da6949/32.png) [@MJinks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MJinks)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/9 "2009-11-05T18:01:56Z")
I think [this dive](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVksdN4QnvA) is the one I will remember longest. ---
**Author:** ![Wallenstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5a626/32.png) [@Wallenstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallenstein)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/10 "2009-11-05T18:46:59Z")
Football can be a dangerous game… some stadiums evidently have [snipers in the stands](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vl3HnU0HOhk). ---
**Author:** ![Busy\_Scissors](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d78d45/32.png) [@Busy\_Scissors](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Busy_Scissors)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/11 "2009-11-06T13:39:36Z")
Thread about football diving wouldn’t be complete without bambi on ice himself - [Mr Stevie G(bh)](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVb2gbMtN3I&feature=video_response). To be fair to the lad he’s a superbly deceptive diver, and it’s only in recent years that he’s been rumbled. ---
**Author:** ![cantara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6f9a4e/32.png) [@cantara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cantara)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/12 "2009-11-06T18:44:04Z")
I’m at work just now and can’t access Youtube, but I have to mention a commercial from about a decade ago that parodied a (Italian olympic?) team practicing. The coach blew a whistle and after a moment, the entire team dropped to the ground writhing in pain. I’ll search for it when I get home if someone hasn’t already found it. I don’t follow soccer/football, but the whole practice seems disgraceful to me. It looks equally bad in hockey. I recall a playoff hockey game years ago where the referees let the game play hard, and the commentator observed, “There’s muggings going on out there!” ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2009, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/13 "2009-11-07T00:10:45Z")
> [@MJinks](#): > > I think [this dive](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVksdN4QnvA) is the one I will remember longest. I hadn’t seen that one before. It is debatable whether the red-jersied player deserved a red-card for that act alone–it is possible that he said something as or after he kicked the ball, or that there was some other circumstance involved. But I certainly hope that Rivaldo was cautioned for that dive. Though I suspect he wasn’t. It is interesting that several comments on the YouTube page mentioned that a penalty kick was given for this “offense”. It is impossible to see how that could have happened. It would have been so utterly ridiculous that an assistant referee (not to mention all of the red team’s players) would certainly have spoken to the referee about such a mistake. The problem isn’t even so much that the “foul” didn’t occur in the penalty area (although that is a rather enormous problem). The problem is that no foul of any sort occurred. There can not be a foul when the ball is out of play. Obviously there can be \*misconduct \*(leading to a yellow or a red card, or worse), but a foul can only be committed when the ball is in play. I would love to know whether a penalty kick was actually awarded because of what transpired in that clip. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Sensitive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/58956e/32.png) [@Darth\_Sensitive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Sensitive)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2009, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/14 "2009-11-07T00:35:01Z")
> [@cantara](#): > > I’m at work just now and can’t access Youtube, but I have to mention a commercial from about a decade ago that parodied a (Italian olympic?) team practicing. The coach blew a whistle and after a moment, the entire team dropped to the ground writhing in pain. I’ll search for it when I get home if someone hasn’t already found it. [Italian Submarines!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LacWlX5gOJI) ---
**Author:** ![Ximenean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/aca169/32.png) [@Ximenean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ximenean)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2009, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/15 "2009-11-07T01:02:03Z")
> [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](#): > > I would love to know whether a penalty kick was actually awarded because of what transpired in that clip. No, it wasn’t. As you say, even if there was a foul, it wasn’t committed inside the penalty area. As for the OP’s clip, the “posthumous” thing is good but otherwise it seems like a fairly routine example of British football commentary. The commentator is Jon Champion, I believe. If you think that is hilarious, you’d probably die of laughter well before the end of an average edition of _Match of the Day_. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2009, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/16 "2009-11-07T03:00:03Z")
> [@Ximenean](#): > > No, it wasn’t. As you say, even if there was a foul, it wasn’t committed inside the penalty area. > > As for the OP’s clip, the “posthumous” thing is good but otherwise it seems like a fairly routine example of British football commentary. The commentator is Jon Champion, I believe. If you think that is hilarious, you’d probably die of laughter well before the end of an average edition of _Match of the Day_. I don’t think the average edition of MOTD has all-star comments like the “posthumous” one. But you’re correct in celebrating the British wit and color that we’re treated to in so many football “play-by-plays”. A bit routine? Perhaps some of it is–to an avid world football fan. But this is MPSIMS and I wanted to share the delightful combination of an incredibly bad dive and the accompanying witty (as commonplace as that wit may be to you) commentary. This is an international board and I suspect that some people (Americans, especially) don’t regularly watch MOTD or any other proper football highlights. > [@](#): > > As you say, even if there was a foul, it wasn’t committed inside the penalty area. Again-- there certainly was NO foul no matter how vicious the offender’s action was judged to be, becuase it is impossible to foul someone when the ball is out of play. ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2009, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/17 "2009-11-07T14:26:21Z")
> [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](#): > > I would love to know whether a penalty kick was actually awarded because of what transpired in that clip. As noted, none was. But here’s a [video](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6kHpIOt3CQ&feature=related) where one was awarded for an entirely bogus dive. Note that the player later received a suspension. ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2009, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/18 "2009-11-10T19:27:04Z")
[Here’s one](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNyWyX-vtC8) from last night. Utter shit. ---
**Author:** ![Maserschmidt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maserschmidt/32/18829_2.png) [@Maserschmidt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maserschmidt)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2009, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/19 "2009-11-10T19:42:50Z")
The fan who [attacked Dida](http://www.jokeroo.com/video/funny/celtic-fan-assaults-dida.html) on the pitch and mercilessly beat him will always have a place in my heart. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2009, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372/20 "2009-11-10T20:05:11Z")
> [@ducati](#): > > I’m American. > > I don’t get it. > > Is he trying to imply that he was tripped up by the other guy? > Is faking a fall to get someone penalized an offence itself? > > How does anyone get excited about this? Why is it always like this? I’m an American, and do not follow soccer (football. Sorry.) But upon a brief viewing, even I can tell that diving is a shallow, opportunistic, unsportsmanlike travesty. Why is this so hard? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-soccer-dive-leads-to-best-soccer-announcing/516372.md?page=2)