# Worst songs of the 70s **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** music\ **Created:** [November 7, 2021, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924 "2021-11-07T04:58:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/221 "2021-11-13T05:00:42Z")
There will be no burning of the Atlanta Rhythm Section in this thread, please. The city has suffered enough. ~Doraville… touch of country in the city… Doraville… it’s not much but it’s home. ~ Like, literally. Lived there when the song was big (at least in Atlanta), also lived in Snellville and Loganville as well. Lawrenceville, too. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/222 "2021-11-13T05:06:44Z")
When I was young I never needed anyone And making love was just for fun Those days are gone ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/223 "2021-11-13T05:09:06Z")
Stay with me, lay with me Holding me, loving me, baby ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/224 "2021-11-13T05:10:20Z")
And if you’re wondering what this song is leading to I want to make it with you ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/225 "2021-11-13T05:11:55Z")
I’d just like to share that YouTube has recently kind of given up on me and started showing me Spanish language Taco Bell commercials. I don’t speak/understand Spanish very well, and I haven’t eaten Taco Bell in many years. I’d like to believe it’s doing that due to my viewing in this thread in conjunction with my regular viewing habits. Sadly, it’s closer to my condition than the advertisements for custom business jet interiors and concealed carry holsters I was getting before. They’re homing in on me. ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/226 "2021-11-13T12:24:35Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Muppets improve _everything_ . Even without gratuitous T&A closeups of Swedish Chef? ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/227 "2021-11-13T12:33:35Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > Also comes with a founding nomination for the worst band name of the 70s: **Disco-Tex and the Sex-O-Lettes** you know first-time I’d ever heard that name Elvis Costello name-dropped them on his anti desert storm song "invasion hit parade " in 91/92 …i thought he just made them up …until someone else heard the song and laughed saying wow someone remembered them …he just said they were some “disco novelty trash” back in the 70s ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/228 "2021-11-13T15:01:54Z")
> [@Bullitt](#): > > What about the ultimate masturbation song… Captain Jack (Billy Joel) is also a contender. > **[Billy Joel – Captain Jack](https://genius.com/Billy-joel-captain-jack-lyrics)** > > “Captain Jack,” written and sung by Billy Joel, first appeared on his 1973 album Piano Man. It also has a popular live version on his 1981 album Songs in the Attic. > > The song is an And “Turning Japanese” is interpreted that way by some: I’ve heard it was so-called because of the faces made at climax. > **[The Vapors' “Turning Japanese” Lyrics Meaning](https://www.songmeaningsandfacts.com/the-vapors-turning-japanese-lyrics-meaning/)** > > In "Turning Japanese", in addition to missing her, the absence of the singer’s girlfriend is having a generally-negative psychological effect. As a “worst” song I’ll add “Hot Child in the City,” which I always thought was lame but also turns out to be about child prostitution. > Despite the song’s innocent and catchy pop stylings, the tune is based on Gilder’s experiences witnessing [child prostitution](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_prostitution). “I’ve seen a lot of young girls, 15 and 16, walking down Hollywood Boulevard with their pimps. Their home environment drove them to distraction so they ran away, only to be trapped by something even worse. It hurts to see that so I tried writing from the perspective of a lecher – in the guise of an innocent pop song.”[[5]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hot_Child_in_the_City#cite_note-5) [Wikipedia source](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hot_Child_in_the_City) ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/229 "2021-11-13T15:42:23Z")
“Undercover Angel,” by Alan O’Day Trust me, you don’t want to go there. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2021, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/230 "2021-11-13T15:51:05Z")
What about this tripe… [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/EuAY4WQHor8/hqdefault.jpg "Simon Park Orchestra - Eye Level [1972]") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EuAY4WQHor8) Every single brass band played this ad nauseum. ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/231 "2021-11-14T00:32:35Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > I dunno. For me, Donna Summer’s/Gorgio Morodor’s “I Feel Love” is like one of the greatest songs ever. Such an awesome song. Groundbreaking? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/232 "2021-11-14T00:41:10Z")
Groundbreaking: > **[I feel love: Donna Summer and Giorgio Moroder created the template for dance...](https://mixmag.net/feature/i-feel-love-donna-summer-and-giorgio-moroder-created-the-template-for-dance-music-as-we-know-it)** > > The year 1977 was a momentous one for disco worldwide Also: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/_W5mjN-azuM/maxresdefault.jpg "Songs That Changed Music: Donna Summer - I Feel Love") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_W5mjN-azuM) ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/233 "2021-11-14T01:43:43Z")
Can’t remember if I’ve contributed to this thread yet, so don’t know if these had been presented For Your Consideration: A super shitty Canadian band called Prism put out a couple ‘radio hits’ that are toss-ups for The Ultra-Shittiest: [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/sSyYqD9v_wo/hqdefault.jpg "Prism - Spaceship Superstar") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSyYqD9v_wo) featuring one of my favourite alltime sets of lyrics: [_I’m a spaceship superstar_ _Got a solar-powered laser beam guitar (he’s a spaceship superstar)_ _I’m at the top of all the charts on Mars (got a solar-powered laser beam guitar)_ _I’m a spaceship superstar_ ](https://youtu.be/sSyYqD9v_wo?t=85) or [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dBmvElD_0Ow/hqdefault.jpg "Prism - Armageddon") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBmvElD_0Ow) _Armageddon, carry me home_ huh? ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/234 "2021-11-14T01:57:29Z")
> [@lobotomyboy63](#): > > Captain Jack (Billy Joel) is also a contender. Captain Jack is about heroin, isn’t it? I don’t think whacking off kept anyone from going back to school. 🤨 ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/235 "2021-11-14T02:25:55Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > Captain Jack is about heroin, isn’t it? I don’t think whacking off kept anyone from going back to school. I think the father being found dead meant he would have to stay home and be the man of the house…he couldn’t go back to college and do that. I mean, “New English clothes” says to me he’s older than high school. Googling around, it seems you’re right, though. Billy said it’s about drugs in general, though he witnessed heroin deals. I’d always heard the other (masturbation) and artists often put multiple meanings in…but apparently the man himself said it was about drugs during an interview. > **[Billy Joel Talks About 'Captain Jack' - Billy Joel Official Site](https://www.billyjoel.com/news/billy-joel-talks-about-captain-jack/)** > > “Captain Jack isn't Jack Daniels. I used to live near the projects in Long Island and there were drugs going on and the dealer was called Captain Jack. There was also smack. They used to use the rhyme for smack, Captain Jack. So I didn't mean it to... The article is dated 2011, but my erroneous impression predates that by decades… ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/236 "2021-11-14T02:30:44Z")
I’ve always loved “Spaceship Superstar.” They had another great-to-me-anyway semi-hit called “Take Me To The Kaptin.” [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bjb75geCcMI/hqdefault.jpg "Prism - Take Me To The Kaptin") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjb75geCcMI) However, they also had a song that got some airplay called “Open Soul Surgery” that you probably don’t want to hear, because it truly is awful. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/237 "2021-11-14T02:35:14Z")
Foghat’s “Stone Blue” hasn’t, for me anyway, stood up to the test of time. [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/c0McO4sY8pA/hqdefault.jpg "Foghat - Stone Blue (Long Version)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0McO4sY8pA) While searching for that, I also found this, which also suffered from massive overplaying. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/hI8Vg53nuF4/maxresdefault.jpg "Never Been Any Reason") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hI8Vg53nuF4) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/238 "2021-11-14T02:52:28Z")
This song was also played to death, especially at my old job, where one of the technicians had it in heavy rotation on her iPod. The same woman had to get a talking-to about her body cream, that smelled like chocolate chip cookies. That gets a bit nauseating after 8 hours. [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hQB5qpxcixc/hqdefault.jpg?sqp=-oaymwEmCOADEOgC8quKqQMa8AEB-AH-BIAC4AOKAgwIABABGGUgXyhXMA8=&rs=AOn4CLA4jBuYtSRPxKloY9pZ0pViodwjQw "Ambrosia - How Much I Feel (with lyrics)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQB5qpxcixc) ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/239 "2021-11-14T03:14:50Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I’ve always loved “Spaceship Superstar.” They had another great-to-me-anyway semi-hit called “Take Me To The Kaptin.” Same here. Prism is a great band–I’ve seem them about a half-dozen times, and the show has been fun every time. Even had a beer with their lead singer after the show once; we had a great conversation about their music. One of my favourites of theirs–“See Forever Eyes”: [![]( " - YouTube") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrmFLfnWp4w) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2021, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924/240 "2021-11-14T03:21:51Z")
“Flyin’” is another great Prism song. I used to hear it late at night when the AOR station played what we would now call Deep Tracks, and I never knew who did it or what it was called until I found a Prism Greatest Hits CD and realized about 10 seconds in what it was. [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JfJUvpLPLrA/hqdefault.jpg "Prism - Flyin'") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfJUvpLPLrA) Yeah, I know it’s about a groupie. Oh, well. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-songs-of-the-70s/953924.md?page=13)