# Worst superpowers that were actually written in a comic? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 2, 2002, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651 "2002-09-02T06:46:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2002, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/61 "2002-09-12T06:07:15Z")
> [@](#): > > And then, of course, there was the Walrus. Proportinate strength and speed of a walrus, and he wore a walrus outfit. Pretty sad. We’ll overlook this comment, which was clearly an accidental posting from the “Coolest Superheros Ever” thread. Damn hamsters. ---
**Author:** ![li\_l\_Dickie\_Dirtz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/2bfe46/32.png) [@li\_l\_Dickie\_Dirtz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/li_l_Dickie_Dirtz)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2002, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/62 "2002-09-12T18:34:58Z")
Well, I thought mine would win for sure, but after reading some of these… There was a Marvel villain (I believe in a Hulk comic) who was a geometry teacher (I think – where’s Fenris?). Loved geometry. Always thinking about the geometry. Until one day he discovered he could project geometric shapes from his mind into solid form. So, there he was, throwing trapezoids and parallelpipeds out at people, robbing banks with an isoceles triangle, that kinda stuff. He tried to trap the Hulk in a dodecahedron or something. He didn’t last long. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by photopat_ > And never forget Infectious Lass, who could give anybody any disease, only couldn’t control the intensity. Don’t make her mad on a date! This is very similar to a hero/villain I made up for my own amusement: **Allergy Man**. I mean, who could stop him, when he can project a very itchy rash on you, or a violent fit of sneezing? ---
**Author:** ![Mojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Mojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mojo)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2002, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/63 "2002-09-12T21:46:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Snooooopy \* > \*\*I always thought Cypher from The New Mutants was … well, I don’t want to say that the power sucks, because being able to read any language you want is pretty freaking cool. But is there a reason to bring him out in the field with you? How useful is he going to be in a fight? \*\* In real life, yes, that’s a cool power. But for some strange reason it seems that most alien races speak english, at least in the comics I read. (and I saw his death coming a mile away) ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2002, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/64 "2002-09-12T23:12:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mojo \* > \*\* > > In real life, yes, that’s a cool power. But for some strange reason it seems that most alien races speak english, at least in the comics I read. > > (and I saw his death coming a mile away) \*\* Maybe he could also read “body language.” Cypher: “Hey, Professor, I can tell from Magneto’s body language that he’s really pissed and plans to kill us all.” Professor X: “Thank you Cypher. I had already figured that out from the giant barbed spears he’s throwing at us, but I appreciate the confirmation.” ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2002, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/65 "2002-09-13T03:04:57Z")
Does that mean Cypher was Marvel’s version of Deanna Troi? ---
**Author:** ![Go\_alien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9d8465/32.png) [@Go\_alien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_alien)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2002, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/66 "2002-09-13T10:17:25Z")
**Kat** , except more useful ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2002, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/67 "2002-09-13T16:41:18Z")
**Go alien** but not as good looking. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2002, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651/68 "2002-09-13T18:29:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by li’l Dickie Dirtz \* > **There was a Marvel villain (I believe in a Hulk comic) who was a geometry teacher (I think – where’s Fenris?). Loved geometry. Always thinking about the geometry. Until one day he discovered he could project geometric shapes from his mind into solid form. So, there he was, throwing trapezoids and parallelpipeds out at people, robbing banks with an isoceles triangle, that kinda stuff. He tried to trap the Hulk in a dodecahedron or something. He didn’t last long.** His name was Locus, and he appeared in an issue of Thor. Came really close to beating Thor, too. Trapped Thor in one shape and his hammer in another. Had they been separated for 60 seconds Thor would have reverted to his mortal guise and been an easy target even for Lame-ass, I mean, Locus. Thor got his hammer back with, like, 3 seconds to spare. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/worst-superpowers-that-were-actually-written-in-a-comic/126651.md?page=3)