# Would a man saying "I'm a feminist" to explain his lack of deferential manners to dates be OK?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-a-man-saying-im-a-feminist-to-explain-his-lack-of-deferential-manners-to-dates-be-ok/784578>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [April 16, 2017, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-a-man-saying-im-a-feminist-to-explain-his-lack-of-deferential-manners-to-dates-be-ok/784578 "2017-04-16T19:44:28Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 8

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**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-a-man-saying-im-a-feminist-to-explain-his-lack-of-deferential-manners-to-dates-be-ok/784578/141 "2017-04-30T17:02:26Z")

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> [@raventhief](#):
>
> So does that mean i am a real tech after all, or am i now doubly not real?

I’m fairly sure cleavage makes you not a real tech, even if you’re a fake woman.

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**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\
**Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-a-man-saying-im-a-feminist-to-explain-his-lack-of-deferential-manners-to-dates-be-ok/784578/142 "2017-04-30T17:11:55Z")

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> [@jsgoddess](#):
>
> I’m fairly sure cleavage makes you not a real tech, even if you’re a fake woman.

I had no idea i am such a fakey fake fake.

\< hangs head in shame\>

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**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2017, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-a-man-saying-im-a-feminist-to-explain-his-lack-of-deferential-manners-to-dates-be-ok/784578/143 "2017-05-03T14:55:26Z")

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> [@Urbanredneck](#):
>
> So I need to ask you, is a feminist man required to turn off the “boobies are hot” part of their brains?

My answer is best [found here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=825334).

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2017, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-a-man-saying-im-a-feminist-to-explain-his-lack-of-deferential-manners-to-dates-be-ok/784578/144 "2017-05-03T17:13:22Z")

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> [@AHunter3](#):
>
> It’s not as stupid a question as some people may be thinking it is. Some feminists HAVE EVER expressed the sentiment that it is always evil and wrong to sexually objectify someone. Or at least for a man to do so to a woman because of the existing power imbalance.

I would say it is wrong to objectify someone in any case, its being sexual is just a specific flavor.

Finding someone attractive doesn’t equal objectifying.

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