# Would any other country intervene if Switzerland were conquered? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 31, 2009, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226 "2009-12-31T20:48:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/21 "2010-01-02T06:40:19Z")
If an army with teleportation technology took over Switzerland the entire world would shit its pants and unite to defeat the super-science equipped bad guys. You’d see Ahmadinejad shake hands with Netanyahu, Uribe shake hands with Chavez, Kim Jong Il shake hands with, well, everybody. Every country would do it’s best to defeat the invaders, not because of treaty obligations or a love of the Swiss, but because supervillains just can’t be tolerated. ---
**Author:** ![horsetech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dec6dc/32.png) [@horsetech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/horsetech)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/22 "2010-01-02T07:57:21Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > Complain to the Secretary-General. Tell him that you want to be on his important-changes mailing-list. No, don’t do that. I was on it for a while, and he kept sending out hackneyed jokes and the same cutesy pictures of animals holding hands, stupid shit like that. Apparently, his idea of “important changes” includes the fact that he has now heard the joke about the 3 terrorists who walked into a bar and asked to get bombed. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/23 "2010-01-02T08:57:08Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > I expect that NATO would immediately intervene, if only to prevent any interruption in the world’s supply of bland yellow cheese with holes in it. And clocks, don’t forget the Cuckoo Clocks;) ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 9:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/24 "2010-01-02T09:15:03Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > If an army with teleportation technology took over Switzerland the entire world would shit its pants and unite to defeat the super-science equipped bad guys. You’d see Ahmadinejad shake hands with Netanyahu, Uribe shake hands with Chavez, Kim Jong Il shake hands with, well, everybody. Every country would do it’s best to defeat the invaders, not because of treaty obligations or a love of the Swiss, but because supervillains just can’t be tolerated. Either that, or every nation would be rushing in to try and claim the new technology for themselves. > [@chowder](#): > > And clocks, don’t forget the Cuckoo Clocks;) And hot chocolate, don’t forget that. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/25 "2010-01-02T11:30:39Z")
> [@Nobody](#): > > And hot chocolate, don’t forget that. Sorry man, but I feel myself obliged to defend the honor of chocolate con churros, which grabs chocolate fondue and kicks it out the door without breaking into a sweat. And this is coming from someone who doesn’t even much like churros. ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/26 "2010-01-02T11:35:18Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Sorry man, but I feel myself obliged to defend the honor of chocolate con churros, which grabs chocolate fondue and kicks it out the door without breaking into a sweat. And this is coming from someone who doesn’t even much like churros. I knew I should have included a link. Actually, I was making a sarcastic remark about [this](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swiss_Miss). I guess it’s just an American product though. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/27 "2010-01-02T16:20:00Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > \ > supervillains just can’t be tolerated. Obviously untrue, given the fact that **TubaDiva** has yet to ban me despite the 11,578–well, 11,579, now–reasons to do so. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/28 "2010-01-02T16:25:56Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Obviously untrue, given the fact that **TubaDiva** has yet to ban me despite the 11,578–well, 11,579, now–reasons to do so. [Quote=Sun-tzu] Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. [/QUOTE] 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/29 "2010-01-02T16:29:26Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > 😃 I KNEW you were going to say that! And now it’s 11,580 reasons! Lest I be accused of post-padding, let me move the goalposts a bit. Forget the silly sci-fi scenario & imagine instead that it were an internal coup, perhaps one arranged by the Germans or Italians. The Swiss government gets out of Bern a hop, skip, and a jump ahead of the firing squad and establishes itself in exile in–oh, let’s say London. What international repercussions would there be? ---
**Author:** ![qbadger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/fbc32d/32.png) [@qbadger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/qbadger)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/30 "2010-01-02T16:38:08Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Not by **me** , of course. I have foresworn all my mad, super-villainous ambitions. (Well, all but two.) But let’s say somebody managed to break into the Rhymer-Lair and reprogrammed the flying robot sharks, radioactive mosquitos, and flying monkeys to serve him or her. Said interloper the uses the teleporter or whatnot to transport the sci-fi army into the middle of Bern, Lausanne, Geneva, & so forth. After twenty-four hours of battle, the Swiss are forced to submit. The conqueror immediately and publically disavows any further territorial ambitions. > > Would any other nation intervene? _Should_ any other nation intervene? Why or why not? No - because they would expect Mr Rhymer to promptly clean up the mess himself given it’s caused by his own egregious mistake over lack of proper security. You did remember the code for the remote self-destruct function of the Flying robot sharks and monkeys, Mr Rhymer? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/31 "2010-01-02T16:50:40Z")
> [@qbadger](#): > > No - because they would expect Mr Rhymer to promptly clean up the mess himself given it’s caused by his own egregious mistake over lack of proper security. Giving up all my mad ambitions but two does not mean that I have REFORMED. > [@](#): > > You did remember the code for the remote self-destruct function of the Flying robot sharks and monkeys, Mr Rhymer? Well, yeah, but I’ll only use that if I, my family, Natalie Portman, or Taye Diggs is in danger. Well, and Valerie Martin. ---
**Author:** ![wierdaaron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/eada6e/32.png) [@wierdaaron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wierdaaron)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/32 "2010-01-02T16:58:25Z")
All I know is that when the invading army first crosses the Swiss border, the first Swiss citizen they encounter will ask, “Swiss all this about?” ---
**Author:** ![Xotan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/278dde/32.png) [@Xotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xotan)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/33 "2010-01-02T20:45:58Z")
I cannot conceive why anyone would want to invade and take over Switzerland. On my way home last October, I drove from the frontier at Bregenz (Austrian Tyrol) to Geneva - that’s about as far as you can travel in Switzerland - and saw nothing that would want me to take the place on, even if they paid me. Besides, their German is abysmal, and they have noisy cows with clunking bells around their necks. I even drove past a town called Wanken… Think what the inhabitants must be called. Enough. Leave the Swiss to their own devices and vices. ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2010, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/34 "2010-01-02T23:22:13Z")
I suppose it depends on the new regime. If they basically keep everything as it is, and don’t oppress the populace, they might just get away with it. ---
**Author:** ![R.P.McMurphy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@R.P.McMurphy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R.P.McMurphy)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2010, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/35 "2010-01-03T22:31:20Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > If an army with teleportation technology took over Switzerland the entire world would shit its pants and unite to defeat the super-science equipped bad guys. You’d see Ahmadinejad shake hands with Netanyahu, Uribe shake hands with Chavez, Kim Jong Il shake hands with, well, everybody. Every country would do it’s best to defeat the invaders, not because of treaty obligations or a love of the Swiss, but because supervillains just can’t be tolerated. You are right for the wrong reason. It has nothing to do with super villains, it has to do with money. Every community needs a bank, every nation needs an international bank. How else are you going to pay your spooks, launder money, fund insurgent armies, park the money you’ve looted from the treasury, make sketchy arms deals and keep track of all the other financial shenanigans that go on in the world. The good guys and the bad guys all need a neutral place that they can trust. Tin pot dictators, religious zealots and megalomaniacs are as interested in protecting Switzerland as the Super Powers. ---
**Author:** ![NicePete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee7513/32.png) [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2010, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/36 "2010-01-04T16:43:52Z")
“What makes a good country go neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or was it just born with a heart full of neutrality?” /Zapp Brannigan ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2010, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/37 "2010-01-04T17:24:09Z")
> [@Spartydog](#): > > You are right for the wrong reason. It has nothing to do with super villains, it has to do with money. Every community needs a bank, every nation needs an international bank. How else are you going to pay your spooks, launder money, fund insurgent armies, park the money you’ve looted from the treasury, make sketchy arms deals and keep track of all the other financial shenanigans that go on in the world. The good guys and the bad guys all need a neutral place that they can trust. Tin pot dictators, religious zealots and megalomaniacs are as interested in protecting Switzerland as the Super Powers. No, teleportation presents a far more dreadful threat than a mere loss of shady bankers, who also exist in the Caymans. Any nation could be next: Vietnam, Belgium, South Africa, who knows? Also, an army with teleportation might have other forms of super-science, like death rays, zombification viruses, or unstoppable killer robots. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2010, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226/38 "2010-01-04T17:47:10Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > No, teleportation presents a far more dreadful threat than a mere loss of shady bankers, who also exist in the Caymans. Any nation could be next: Vietnam, Belgium, South Africa, who knows? Also, an army with teleportation might have other forms of super-science, like death rays, zombification viruses, or unstoppable killer robots. It was established in the OP that their were flying robot sharks with particle-beam cannons on their heads, I think. I’m too lazy to scroll up to make sure. Only a nihilistic madman would create zombification virus. There’s no practical application. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-any-other-country-intervene-if-switzerland-were-conquered/523226.md?page=1)