# Would straight women prefer to be raped by a man or another woman?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [May 18, 2013, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656 "2013-05-18T04:20:43Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Not\_a\_Platypus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_a_Platypus)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/21 "2013-05-18T14:47:30Z")
Thankfully I’ve never been raped, so I can only speculate about what it’s like. I guess if I had a preference it’d be a woman, if only because pregnancy is unlikely.
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### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/22 "2013-05-18T14:57:43Z")
I’d “chose” the woman, not because of pregnancy (I’d be Plan B’ing anyhow, and aborting if that failed) but because it’s harder to catch STI’s from woman-woman sex. STI’s are harder to get rid of than a pregnancy. The rest of it would be just as horrid either way.
And I vehemently disagree with the notion that women prone to violence aren’t as violent or as capable of doing great bodily harm as men. It’s a total myth, compounded by underreporting by victims who buy into that myth and are ashamed to report violence done to them by women. I’ve spent time as a nurse on both “aggressive men” and “women” floors of psych units (never seen a women’s unit designated specifically “aggressive”). Give me the “aggressive men” any day - most of them just shout and lunge a lot. Bitches be trippin’. And slapping. And punching. And kicking. And spitting. And biting.
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### Author:  [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/23 "2013-05-18T15:31:22Z")
The OP is totally offensive.
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### Author:  [@stoplight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stoplight)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/24 "2013-05-18T16:16:19Z")
I guess you have to define rape by another woman. The traditional sense of the word implies penetration. Done by a woman to woman what instrument would be used? that could be a really nasty variable. Since rape is related to anger and aggression, power and control one would have to assume that woman would be just as violent toward the victim as a male.
Same sex prison rape though in a different context would be just as vile if not worse then male on female just based on the prison environment
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### Author:  [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/25 "2013-05-18T16:44:37Z")
> [@snailboy](#):
>
> Someone brought this up and I’m kind of thinking the average woman would prefer to be raped by another woman as another woman would seem a little less likely to kill you. That’s certainly the way I would feel about it whether it’s true or not.
No, it’s not true. Seriously, WTF?
> [@](#):
>
> I don’t really have much perspective on such a situation though so I’d like some opinions from women.
No, you really DON’T have any perspective. None at all.
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### Author:  [@snailboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snailboy)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/26 "2013-05-18T20:09:21Z")
> [@Zelkova](#):
>
> No, I wouldn’t prefer to be raped by a woman. The idea that woman-on-woman rape is the inherently preferable combination of victim and attacker would seem to follow from the sexist belief that women are incapable of doing real physical harm to others
Not incapable but less likely.
> [@](#):
>
> along with the belief that “real sex” requires the penetration of a vagina by a penis.
Not this at all.
> [@](#):
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> How is this perception relevant in a situation in which a woman has already begun or completed a physical assault against someone and proved herself to be a danger?
In a logical sense, it’s not, but emotions aren’t based completely on logic.
> [@](#):
>
> I can’t understand why. It’s not as though women are any more gentle than men when committing torture.
They probably aren’t, and like I said actual statistics would probably disagree with the perception, but the perception is that women are more empathetic and less likely to do it in the first place, so maybe they wouldn’t be as cold-hearted when doing it. Women may not share that perspective though (and it would seem they don’t).
> [@overlyverbose](#):
>
> That really depends. Plus, I think that a lot of people assume that one woman raping the other wouldn’t involve penetration.
I was actually assuming it did.
> [@HoneyBadgerDC](#):
>
> I try to imagine it like this. A man has you in a room and he tells you that behind the green door is another man and behind the yellow door is a woman. Both of them want to rape you but only one will be allowed. You have to pick which one rapes you.
Pretty much. It’s about which would be less traumatic, if either.
> [@BigT](#):
>
> Just commenting on how bad the title is. Why not put it as “Which would a straight woman think was worse?”
Perhaps, but I don’t see having a preference for something as meaning you like it. I’d prefer to stick my hand in fire than to stick my face in fire, but I wouldn’t enjoy either. If that’s what people are getting hung up about, then let me assure you I wasn’t downplaying any version of rape.
> [@stoplight](#):
>
> I guess you have to define rape by another woman. The traditional sense of the word implies penetration. Done by a woman to woman what instrument would be used?
I don’t really want that to become a variable, so let’s assume the woman would do it in as similar a manner as possible as the man.
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### Author:  [@stoplight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stoplight)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/27 "2013-05-18T22:50:42Z")
> [@snailboy](#):
>
> Not incapable but less likel
>
> I don’t really want that to become a variable, so let’s assume the woman would do it in as similar a manner as possible as the man.
if that is the case, similar method of penetration, then flip a coin, male or female rapist is off the rails from the get, no telling the final outcome.
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### Author:  [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)
#### Post date: [May 18, 2013, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/28 "2013-05-18T23:14:34Z")
Edited because I changed my mind.
Rape is traumatic. Being raped by a male and raped by a female have their own different variables, but both are still traumatic. I can’t pick one
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### Author:  [@snailboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snailboy)
#### Post date: [May 19, 2013, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/29 "2013-05-19T00:10:28Z")
So I get the impression that for most, one would not be significantly worse than the other or it’s difficult to say. That makes sense. It appears that sexual orientation would make a difference for very few which agrees with what I was thinking.
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### Author:  [@MegaBee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MegaBee)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/30 "2013-05-20T14:37:27Z")
> [@snailboy](#):
>
> Not that either would be much of a preference, but which would be less traumatizing? This is assuming that the rapist isn’t someone you know well, not a family member, close friend, or boyfriend but someone who might be a threat to your life, something like a date rape scenario.
>
> Someone brought this up and I’m kind of thinking the average woman would prefer to be raped by another woman as another woman would seem a little less likely to kill you. That’s certainly the way I would feel about it whether it’s true or not. I don’t really have much perspective on such a situation though so I’d like some opinions from women.
How did you think this was a good idea?
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### Author:  [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/31 "2013-05-20T15:15:40Z")
This thread is disturbing.
It doesn’t matter if it a man, woman, or dinosaur, rape is a violation and traumatic and can’t be qualifed based on gender or manner of forced penetration.
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### Author:  [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/32 "2013-05-20T16:34:23Z")
This thread is gross.
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### Author:  [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/33 "2013-05-20T18:36:54Z")
Agreed.
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### Author:  [@snailboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snailboy)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/34 "2013-05-20T18:40:20Z")
> [@MegaBee](#):
>
> How did you think this was a good idea?
I already explained why I would feel that way about being tortured.
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### Author:  [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/35 "2013-05-20T20:59:25Z")
> [@snailboy](#):
>
> I already explained why I would feel that way about being tortured.
Women can be brutal. We aren’t the weaker sex no matter what anyone thinks I don’t think it would be any better to be tortured by a woman than it would be by a man that’s the whole point. Torture is torture and rape is rape it doesn’t matter who does it.
There is some heart wrenching and disgusting history of women who raped and tortured. They are just as brutal if not more so than many men who do. To think otherwise is ignorant of human nature.
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### Author:  [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/36 "2013-05-20T21:11:18Z")
The main question is worded wrong because it makes use of the word “prefer”.
Rather what would be more forcing for more people to actually output an answer is if the question was worded as, “What’s _less bad_?”
Think of it as the game “would you rather” - you hypothetically choose one or the other and “neither” is not an option.
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### Author:  [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/37 "2013-05-20T21:12:54Z")
[Here is a tumblr](http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/female%20rapists) run by men who have been raped by women. They are admittedly just as traumatized and just as angry and upset as women who have been raped by men. To trivialize when one human being perpetrates torture or rape on another human being just because of gender is to trivialize the act itself
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### Author:  [@snailboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snailboy)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/38 "2013-05-20T21:38:10Z")
> [@April\_R](#):
>
> Women can be brutal. We aren’t the weaker sex no matter what anyone thinks I don’t think it would be any better to be tortured by a woman than it would be by a man that’s the whole point. Torture is torture and rape is rape it doesn’t matter who does it.
> There is some heart wrenching and disgusting history of women who raped and tortured. They are just as brutal if not more so than many men who do. To think otherwise is ignorant of human nature.
I’m not sure what you mean by weaker sex but women are far less likely to rape or commit a violent act against someone. Statistics bear that out. Now it’s probably true that a woman that is willing to rape someone isn’t likely to be more gentle than a male rapist, but since we’re talking about emotions and not facts, that doesn’t really matter.
> [@Anonymous User](#):
>
> The main question is worded wrong because it makes use of the word “prefer”.
>
> Rather what would be more forcing for more people to actually output an answer is if the question was worded as, “What’s _less bad_?”
>
> Think of it as the game “would you rather” - you hypothetically choose one or the other and “neither” is not an option.
That would mean exactly the same thing…
> [@April\_R](#):
>
> [Here is a tumblr](http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/female%20rapists) run by men who have been raped by women. They are admittedly just as traumatized and just as angry and upset as women who have been raped by men. To trivialize when one human being perpetrates torture or rape on another human being just because of gender is to trivialize the act itself
No one here has trivialized anything. As has been pointed out, just because two things are bad doesn’t mean they’re equally bad.
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### Author:  [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/39 "2013-05-20T21:51:54Z")
I’m not qualified to answer, but I have an observation.
Women overall are less likely to commit murder than me. However, the subset of women who would rape somebody is a different population. I have no idea if that population is more or less likely than male rapists to commit murder.
Does anybody have the answer to that one?
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### Author:  [@gallows\_fodder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gallows_fodder)
#### Post date: [May 20, 2013, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-straight-women-prefer-to-be-raped-by-a-man-or-another-woman/658656/40 "2013-05-20T22:52:52Z")
What are you seeking to learn from asking this question? If every straight woman on this board answered unanimously that it was worse one way or the other, what would you gain?
What’s worse, dying on the rack or being drawn and quartered? Does it really matter?
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