# Would this woman date you? (Political...very political) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 3, 2018, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741 "2018-04-03T19:12:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/21 "2018-04-03T20:33:14Z")
I think it is possible that I would meet many of her political criteria, but there is absolutely zero chance we would find each other to be compatible people. (But then, my reaction to about 90% of the content on Everyday Feminism is basically “get off of my side, you’re making us look stupid.”) ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/22 "2018-04-03T20:33:34Z")
I’m not a woman, so of course she wouldn’t date me, but if someone popped a quiz on me like that, I’d answer honestly and without fear of the response. If she started getting pissy about my answers, I’d stop, state the obvious (we will not get along) and walk away. I might even be laughing as I did so. Its just a date. You’re getting to know each other. While it makes some sense to cover your hot button issues right up front so that you don’t waste time on people you’re not going to get along with, I feel this is definitely crossing the line of aggressiveness and selfishness. Because her [del]victims[/del], er, _potential dates_ are there for the same reasons, to see if SHE is worth knowing. Her attitude is far too egotistical and potentially antagonistic for addressing potential lovers. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/23 "2018-04-03T20:39:53Z")
“Before I answer the questions - are we going Dutch?” Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/24 "2018-04-03T20:41:48Z")
No, I fail a few and I’m a liberal. I wouldn’t want to date someone that dogmatic and sanctimonious anyway (which I already am politically, but she is even worse). Sounds like a recipe for constant henpecking and misery. If she wants to only date \<3% of the public, that is her decision. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/25 "2018-04-03T20:46:12Z")
I would pass all her ten tests, but I’m extremely prejudiced against against everyone who has lived in that filth-hole known as Switzerland. They are the absolute worst, and really should be considered subhuman dreck who are not worthy of membership in the glorious collage of genders, identities, religions, abilities, sexualities, that make up the REAL human race. But then again, she doesn’t actually ask in her ten questions about any prejudice against the Swiss and their ilk… so MAYBE she would find me okay to date? Hard to say. ---
**Author:** ![Weedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weedy/32/301_2.png) [@Weedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weedy)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/26 "2018-04-03T20:47:49Z")
Her attitude is really off-putting no matter what the items on her checklist might be. Just having a checklist for dating is obnoxious. But I fully support all of the things on her list, except BDS, which I know nothing about. It’s OK, though, for her to want to date people with similar interests and values to herself. That seems like a normal thing to want. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/27 "2018-04-03T20:51:45Z")
BTW, the writer in the OP [occasionally does a guest spot on SNL](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGsQES_OdrQ&list=PL-IJpD_xcZy6Uweb7RB52LcpYJOVBgE-S). ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/28 "2018-04-03T21:01:05Z")
> [@Weedy](#): > > It’s OK, though, for her to want to date people with similar interests and values to herself. That seems like a normal thing to want. Yeah, it’s normal enough if one’s goal is to live in an echo chamber. Part of what makes a relationship fun, and what makes someone grow as a person, is finding those areas where you and your partner _don’t_ see eye to eye. A list like this pretty much ensures the only disagreements are going to be about how the toilet paper hangs, and whether the ancient grains bread should be toasted before you spread the responsibly-sourced organic avocado on it. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/29 "2018-04-03T21:01:48Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > [10 Things Every Intersectional Feminist Should Ask On a First Date - Everyday Feminism](https://everydayfeminism.com/2017/12/intersectional-feminist-first-date/) > > The woman in the above article is (I believe) gay, so I’m right out of the picture, but let’s pretend she’s whatever orientation would make it possible for her to date you (which, I fear, is heteronormative, but let’s press on, shall we?) > > She has a checklist of ten questions that you MUST. PASS. for her to consider you for a date. The first few seem reasonable: Do you believe that “Black Lives Matter”? I can see that being a legit dealbreaker. But the “Do you hate the Jews?” (aka BDS) one? And a bunch of the others? We’re dealing with someone who’s the cray-cray. She’s also inventing (or using someone else’s invented) lingo that’s completely incomprehensible to anyone not in her cult. My personal favorite? “pro-heauxism”. Which (after much looking) means that you’re in favor of (possibly black) women prostitutes. Heaux=Ho=Whore. Geddit? :rolleyes: > > Do people actually think this way?I mean, I could imagine that I show up for a blind date with this person and she accosts me with a clipboard and wagging finger? Is this a weird fringe movement? It’s apparently not a parody (despite appearances). And do people talk this way? > > (PS: I’m still not sure what intersectional feminism is, but it ain’t the feminism I’m familiar with) I’m genuinely confused by this OP. The woman who wrote it is clearly far left, so I get that you and her wouldn’t get along very well because of that (although you do seem to have a lot in common in the, “Anyone who disagrees with me about Israel is a racist!” category), but “I only date people who agree with my politics,” isn’t exactly an unusual position, and she’s not taking any positions that are particularly radical. Well, okay, “dismantle capitalism” is kind of the definition of radical. I’ll give you that. Beyond that, I’m not sure I get what all the pearl clutching in here is about. ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/30 "2018-04-03T21:14:01Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > “I only date people who agree with my politics,” isn’t exactly an unusual position, and she’s not taking any positions that are particularly radical. Indeed. I mean the only reason this is controversial is because she’s putting her political tests out there in an article when millions probably have certain political bars that aren’t necessarily articulated in a bullet point list. ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/31 "2018-04-03T21:49:02Z")
> [@Weedy](#): > > Her attitude is really off-putting no matter what the items on her checklist might be. Just having a checklist for dating is obnoxious. Hey, I have a checklist for dating! Admittedly, it’s a mental one, not written down, and it’s pretty much ‘remembers to wear pants in public’ and ‘doesn’t dive straight in for a grope’ rather than a questionnaire… And no, that woman would not date me. I’m actually pretty close to ticking all her boxes but I would climb out of the window and run away if she tried. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/32 "2018-04-03T21:56:21Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > I’m genuinely confused by this OP. The woman who wrote it is clearly far left, so I get that you and her wouldn’t get along very well because of that (although you do seem to have a lot in common in the, “Anyone who disagrees with me about Israel is a racist!” category), but “I only date people who agree with my politics,” isn’t exactly an unusual position, and she’s not taking any positions that are particularly radical. > > Well, okay, “dismantle capitalism” is kind of the definition of radical. I’ll give you that. Beyond that, I’m not sure I get what all the pearl clutching in here is about. 1. You’d be surprised at how many points she and I are at least in vague agreement on (at least 6). And if you allow for her shallow, non-globalist point of view\* the number gets somewhat better than that. 2. I’m not sure one of us understands the term “pearl clutching”. To me, it summons the image of Margaret Dumont(?) in the old Marx Bros movies saying “Oh dear” and swooning when someone does something shocking. I’m kind of PALTR at her. So…to me, not pearl-clutching. 3. She reminds me of that one crazy internet lady from the early 2000s who had the list of demands that anyone who wanted to date her WOULD follow…or else. MaryRomantic (remember her? We had a bunch of threads about her) [Gentle Woman Seeks Agnostic Atheist, Strong Attraction, Love](http://web.archive.org/web/20020122173154/http://maryromantic.com) and her list of demands > **[How to E-mail Mary if You Want a Reply](http://web.archive.org/web/20020205094257/maryromantic.com/needs.htm)** > > It would be great if you are and I wanted the same things. You can tell from the special e-mail I request whether we might have a basis for meeting. She and the article writer share the same “It’s all about me, me, me” tone \*The sex-worker question comes to mind. I don’t care if a woman chooses to rent her body as long as there’s some sort of heath check in general and an age barrier, but in the USA, with the pimp “system”, “sex workers” are more often than not coerced and she doesn’t even allow for the discussion of the possiblity of that. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/33 "2018-04-03T21:57:41Z")
I saw that article awhile ago. Not only is it insane, who treats a first date like a job interview? My idea of a first date is “what are your favorite bands?” “what kind of movies do you like?” Not, “what is your position Israel/Palestine?” > [@Velocity](#): > > Seriously, Everyday Feminism reads like a right-wing parody of feminism. A good rule of thumb is that if someone reads Everyday Feminism for any reason other than to get a good laugh, they’re probably someone you want to avoid at all costs. This is one of their milder articles. For example, if you hold a party, [make sure you have someone at the door to sniff your guests](https://everydayfeminism.com/2016/02/how-to-make-party-accessible/), just in case they’re wearing some obnoxious perfume. That way, they can wash it off with your handy little “Sanitation Station”! No, I’m not kidding. (The funniest part? The chick who wrote it says she’s a smoker. :rolleyes:) ---
**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2018, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/34 "2018-04-03T23:58:31Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > … “I only date people who agree with my politics,” isn’t exactly an unusual position … The extremity of “I only date people who are lock step with my politics across the board” though? If that is not unusual it should be. It is not only that I disagree with a few of her positions that would make us incompatible, but the requirement that a potential romantic interest be someone who would not challenge any of her positions, which are held as dogmatic truths? I would be uncomfortable with someone who holds positions I see as hateful, but I would also find being with someone who is my clone on all beliefs to be less interesting than having some back and forth. I do _not_ enjoy the company of those who think in absolutes and who cannot see the grey, who are not even open to exploring why the answer _might_ be more complicated than they initially thought it was, who will brook no disagreement to what they already “know.” ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/35 "2018-04-04T00:28:37Z")
I think sex with her has the _potential_ to be out of this world. Such strong emotion throughout. But that could easily sway the other way and become cold and lifeless. It’s a gamble I think I’d be willing to take. 🆒 ETA: of course no sex is a likely possibility too. Probably _the_ likely possibility. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/36 "2018-04-04T00:53:09Z")
Here’s what I want to know: for those of you who don’t think it’s all that out there for someone to want to date someone who shares your political views, you honestly don’t think there’s anything weird about someone giving you the third degree about this stuff on a freaking _first date_? Like right when you sit down, before you even start ordering your meal, you’re immediately asked for your feelings on human rights abuses in North Korea (or something of that nature)? I would find that very off-putting, to say the least. First dates can be awkward enough. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/37 "2018-04-04T00:58:30Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > The article was pretty much self-explanatory and reasonably easy to understand. She seems to be looking for people that have the same understanding of what’s going on in the world as she does, and I see no problem with that-mental compatibility is as important to her as mental and/or physical compatibility. yes, but if you’re going to grill someone on all of those things as a condition for a date, I’d think I’d pass regardless of how many I agree on. mostly because I can see how everything I would do afterward would be put under a microscope and relentlessly criticized. > [@Velocity](#): > > I am willing to bet also that this woman is the type of person who is not willing to bend much, if at all, to accommodate the desires of a partner, but expects the partner to conform rigidly to her demands to the letter. and this. too many people think “compromise” means “accede to my demands or else.” ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/38 "2018-04-04T01:03:09Z")
> [@MoonMoon](#): > > 1. Must not say cray-cray. Dang right! [Seymour Cray](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seymour_Cray) was a wonderful, brilliant engineer, and nothing like this flake. I’d fail immediately. Probably because I’d tend to give sarcastic answers, just to see how indignant I could make her. Like: \*Black Lives matter … but only 3/5ths as much as a white mans’ life. Maybe a bit more of a womans’ life. \* Even when I agree with the issues (in principle), extremists like this just get my dander up. ---
**Author:** ![Lasciel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e79b87/32.png) [@Lasciel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lasciel)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/39 "2018-04-04T01:13:14Z")
Ohh my god. That MaryRomantic thing is WIIIILD. What the actual fuck. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2018, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741/40 "2018-04-04T01:14:46Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Here’s what I want to know: for those of you who don’t think it’s all that out there for someone to want to date someone who shares your political views, you honestly don’t think there’s anything weird about someone giving you the third degree about this stuff on a freaking _first date_? Like right when you sit down, before you even start ordering your meal, you’re immediately asked for your feelings on human rights abuses in North Korea (or something of that nature)? > I would find that very off-putting, to say the least. First dates can be awkward enough. Yeah but is she hot? 😇 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-this-woman-date-you-political-very-political/811741.md?page=3)