Would you be offended if someone set up a divorce pool during your wedding?

[Lancia]

@Esprise_Me

I don’t see how that addresses the point I made, which was that the distinction you drew between weddings and marriage doesn’t make sense as a basis to not be offended by this bet. You are now proffering a completely different explanation.

Apparently I’m not explaining myself well, but I’m not sure how else to make my point. People taking bets on whether or not my marriage will last are betting on the chances of a legal union lasting long-term which, statistically, is about as likely as a divorce – the current divorce rate is right around 50%. Since there are factors that affect the marriage that are outside of my control I would not find such wagers offensive. This is because the bet those individuals are making is not about

@Esprise_Me

the sincerity of the commitment that the wedding represents

But rather the long-term viability of the union, which of course not only takes the sincere commitment of both individuals (not just mine) but the ability to maintain that commitment long-term.

I agree it is perhaps tacky, but see no reason to get offended.

To look at it another way, if I found out that people were a) betting on my marriage failing and b) betting on how the marriage would fail and c) betting on causes of such failure being things like adultery or assault, then I would be offended because they’re betting on the sincerity of the commitment, not the union itself. Such a wager would be personal as they would be betting on my behavior specifically in a way that betting on the marriage itself is not.

[pulykamell]

@Lancia

To look at it another way, if I found out that people were a) betting on my marriage failing and b) betting on how the marriage would fail and c) betting on causes of such failure being things like adultery or assault, then I would be offended because they’re betting on the sincerity of the commitment, not the union itself. Such a wager would be personal as they would be betting on my behavior specifically in a way that betting on the marriage itself is not.

See, to me it doesn’t matter. Let them bet. What the hell do I care if they think of me that way? If anything, it gives me more incentive to prove them wrong (if such a thing were important to me, but it’s not. What they think of my sincerity is immaterial to me and my marriage. It may be material enough to ask why they’re my friends if they’re betting on such stuff, but that’s another story. The bets themselves are not offensive to me, no matter how you phrase them. I’ve won bets from people who thought I would not be able to achieve a certain medium-term goal, and that was fine with me. It’s okay if people underestimate me. I know who I am and care nought what anyone thinks.)

[Mallard]

@FairyChatMom

My husband and I eloped and told everyone afterwards, so no wedding. But I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that various family members didn’t expect it to last. In fact, I bet my parents would have been among them. After all, we dated four whole weeks!! I’d probably bet against someone in a similar situation.

Ha ha on everyone - it’s been nearly 38 years so far.

My grand parents in law (wonderful people!), “courted” for 14 days and got married. (not sure how that got set up so fast but then it was 1931). Marriage ended 70 years later with his death at the age of 93.

[silenus]

Last wedding I was a part of as best man I ran the pool. The maid-of-honor won.