# Would you buy Sampiros book? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 19, 2012, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286 "2012-02-19T00:35:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Septima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/1 "2012-02-19T00:35:37Z")
Our very own Sampiro is being difficult, or playing hard to get, or just dragging his feet, about that darn book. Apparantly, the thing just lacks _two_ chapters to be finished. So here is a poll to convince the exasperating man that \*we want to read your book, dammit. \* Vote away, multiple choice is possible. And please comment as well. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/2 "2012-02-19T01:26:34Z")
I certainly would. He is as good as–or better than–David Sedaris or Augusten Burroughs. I just wish I could be of some help getting him an agent or a publisher, but I have no contacts in the fiction-writing world. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/3 "2012-02-19T01:29:50Z")
I’d buy the publishing rights and publish it at my own expense even though I have no clue how to do that. I’d make a fortune. Assuming that the SD didn’t claim ownership because he posted much of it here first. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/4 "2012-02-19T01:34:59Z")
Nonexclusive copyright, Second Stone. The most they could do is bundle all his posts in a book form and try to undercut sales. They never would, though because if there’s anything the dope is loathe to do, it’s try to earn money. Also, who would be suicidal enough to come into the thread and say, “Naw, I never found his writing style compelling.”? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/5 "2012-02-19T01:36:35Z")
_Hacksaw: The Musical_ once helped me get laid. I’d buy two. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/6 "2012-02-19T01:41:36Z")
I’d buy one. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/7 "2012-02-19T01:48:45Z")
Totally. Great writer, fascinating story. What’s not to want? Finish the fucking thing already. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/8 "2012-02-19T01:49:46Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > _Hacksaw: The Musical_ once helped me get laid. > > I’d buy two. In that case, I’ll take a dozen. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/9 "2012-02-19T01:53:11Z")
I’d buy one for me, and some as gifts! I live in the South. I feel his pain. ---
**Author:** ![BetsQ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@BetsQ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BetsQ)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/10 "2012-02-19T01:54:38Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > Totally. Great writer, fascinating story. What’s not to want? > > Finish the fucking thing already. I voted “hell yes” before reading the thread, based solely on how very entertaining I find \*\*Sampiro’s \*\*posts. But this suggests that there’s more knowledge about this hypothetical book out there. Link?? ---
**Author:** ![Septima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/11 "2012-02-19T02:21:24Z")
[QUOTE=BetsQ] I voted “hell yes” before reading the thread, based solely on how very entertaining I find Sampiro’s posts. But this suggests that there’s more knowledge about this hypothetical book out there. Link?? [/QUOTE] Well, this poll was inspired by the recent ressurection of [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=369401) thread, which reminded me that Sampiro has been promising to write the thing for years. At the end, we get the most recent status of the project. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/12 "2012-02-19T02:54:19Z")
I also want to see the move version after the book becomes a best seller. Of course, knowing Hollywood executives, they will put in a few minor changes to his book for the movie script: 1. Change all characters to heterosexuals (Angelina Jolie wants to play the role of Sampiro) 2. Delete all references to Southern family and make it about Italian immigrants in New York. (Scorcese/DeNiro might be interested in directing.) 3. Include some vampires and werewolves for the teen market. 4. Put in a dog that does funny stuff and is cute. (Merchandising for Christmas toys.) 5. More explosions. 6. More car chases. 7. More guns. 8. Instead of teacher or scholar, make the main character an assassin. 9. Create a whacky neighbor - Pauly Shore is interested in a cameo role. 10. Give it a happy end. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/13 "2012-02-19T03:14:33Z")
I voted yes, but I dunno. 44 copies sold in a little over three hours? That’s not good enough for a best-seller. I watched Diana Gabaldon sell almost 200 books in less time a few years back. But hey, the midlist is not all bad. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/14 "2012-02-19T03:25:55Z")
Of course. I’ve been reading and laughing over his stories since well before either of us were Dopers. I’ve been waiting for him to publish pretty much that entire time. I’ve been wishing he’d fucking get on with it for _years_. ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/15 "2012-02-19T03:26:37Z")
Sampiro is a fucking amazing writer. He owes it to the world to share these stories in a larger medium. I’d buy 20. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/16 "2012-02-19T03:32:42Z")
I did not read the whole list before I voted, and I would like to change mine from “Hell yes” to “Would come back from the grave.” Mind you I’m a broke librarian and do not usually _buy_ books. Oh, and I would recommend it for purchase at my library. ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/17 "2012-02-19T03:42:45Z")
We could always [hire a muse](http://www.oglaf.com/blank-page/1/). ---
**Author:** ![choie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/choie/32/7829_2.png) [@choie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/choie)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/18 "2012-02-19T03:56:12Z")
Well, I’ll don some asbestos pajamas and admit I answered ‘no’. Especially since the poll is public anyway! 😃 Though a great many of his non-autobiographical posts are pithy and fun, the lengthier tales of his quirky family just don’t engage me… they seem a bit too self-conscious and almost, well, self-indulgent. But hell, one could say the same about many popular and respected authors. It’s clear many do love the tales, so I know my assessment isn’t important. The style is just not to my taste, is all. (I have no doubt many feel the same way about my own writing, such as it is. Also, who am I to talk about self-indulgent, I’m chronically wordy myself!) Of course, a good editor or book doctor would help immeasurably by trimming any fat, and for that matter it’s quite possible that the way he writes for his book might not mimic his posting style here. Either way, it’s clear there’s an audience that admires him greatly and I do understand why. I wish him the best of luck in finishing it and I’m sure if published the book will please many. ---
**Author:** ![lindsaybluth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90db22/32.png) [@lindsaybluth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lindsaybluth)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/19 "2012-02-19T04:44:33Z")
I don’t mean to be a dick to **Eve** but Sedaris is a hack next to Sampiro. I’ll buy a case and pass them out. I don’t care if it ends up that I’ve read it all before – his style is infectious. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2012, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286/20 "2012-02-19T04:50:12Z")
e-copy for me, please! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-buy-sampiros-book/613286.md?page=2)