# would you expect your SO to pay you for a product? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 12, 2018, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866 "2018-10-12T18:11:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![amaguri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@amaguri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amaguri)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/1 "2018-10-12T18:11:41Z")
My side hustle is a home bakery-- I have a website and business cards, etc so I take it semi-seriously but I mostly sell to friends and referrals. My husband requested 2doz cupcakes for a co-worker and he insisted on paying me even after I told him not to bother. All of our money is “our money” anyway, so moving a few bucks between accounts seems… unnecessary? I certainly didn’t argue because it’s not that big of a deal but it just made me think… Would you expect or ask your SO to pay you for something that you created? ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/2 "2018-10-12T18:21:36Z")
If I didn’t expressly give it to them as a gift, then I would expect payment. There are protocols to be followed! Plus if there’s not a transaction to record there’s a risk the budget will go wonky. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/3 "2018-10-12T18:23:07Z")
Did the co-worker pay your husband for them? ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/4 "2018-10-12T18:23:32Z")
I could see this for bookkeeping reasons especially if your business has its own bank account. ---
**Author:** ![Alpha\_Twit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alpha_twit/32/265_2.png) [@Alpha\_Twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Twit)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/5 "2018-10-12T18:27:43Z")
Given that your SO wanted to give these creations to a third party then yes, it’s entirely appropriate that you be paid for them. ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/6 "2018-10-12T18:30:52Z")
No, that would be very strange for my partner to pay me. Now if the third party insisted on paying, that’s different. ---
**Author:** ![senoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@senoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/senoy)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/7 "2018-10-12T18:33:58Z")
> [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > I could see this for bookkeeping reasons especially if your business has its own bank account. That’s a reason NOT to do it. It becomes a business gain and you pay taxes on it. Personally, I couldn’t ever imagine charging my wife for anything or accepting money from her for anything. Seems weird to me. Everything we have is shared. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/8 "2018-10-12T20:11:38Z")
I have, in fact, done work for my husband. It wouldn’t occur to either of us that he’d pay me for it. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/9 "2018-10-12T20:13:23Z")
> [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > I could see this for bookkeeping reasons especially if your business has its own bank account. Saint Cad saved me typing. ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/10 "2018-10-12T20:15:40Z")
Add me to the folks saying yes for record-keeping purposes. Helps you keep track of your time and material costs for schedule C. ---
**Author:** ![Melbourne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Melbourne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melbourne)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/11 "2018-10-12T20:48:38Z")
I would certainly expect to pay /myself/ if I was taking product out of stock. Confusing business and personal is one of the things I was taught leads to small-business failure. Workers can take a reasonable amount of product for personal use: management never. So it depends if you regard your husband as part of management team (must pay), or part of the clientele (goodwill and marketing expenses) ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/12 "2018-10-12T21:11:27Z")
I try my best not to pay for anything. I certainly wouldn’t pay my SO money for any of his vast talents. I am cheap, so sue me. I call him my favorite head handyman. Useful as a shirt pocket. ---
**Author:** ![Hedda\_Rosa](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hedda_rosa/32/1204_2.png) [@Hedda\_Rosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hedda_Rosa)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/13 "2018-10-12T21:26:26Z")
If it was for my partner’s use and enjoyment then no, I would not expect to be paid. But if he was handing them off to the coworker, for her to use then yes I would expect payment. If he didn’t make the coworker pay then the cupcakes were a gift to her, but they were his gift, not yours so you should be paid. Perhaps your husband got to eat one of the cupcakes if it was for a work celebration, but still that doesn’t impact my point. You and he have shared things. Coworker and husband don’t, so payment is definitely owed. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/14 "2018-10-12T22:11:16Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > If I didn’t expressly give it to them as a gift, then I would expect payment. There are protocols to be followed! > > Plus if there’s not a transaction to record there’s a risk the budget will go wonky. > [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > I could see this for bookkeeping reasons especially if your business has its own bank account. If bookkeeping is your concern, you could simply put the (retail) cost of the product against the drawing account. In other words, if the cupcakes cost $20, in your books you’d simply “buy” the cupcakes with money from the drawing account. If played out in real life, that’s no different than you writing a check to yourself and using that money to buy them. ---
**Author:** ![PoppaSan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/poppasan/32/189_2.png) [@PoppaSan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoppaSan)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/15 "2018-10-12T23:11:04Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > Did the co-worker pay your husband for them? I haven’t seen this denied or acknowledged. A smart spouse, hearing of the discussion that has occurred, would be wise to present any future payments in this way. “Oh by the way Terry gave $20 for the cupcakes. Here.” Whether true or not. (also inform Terry of this if there ever is a chance of them meeting.) ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2018, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/16 "2018-10-12T23:57:47Z")
> [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > I could see this for bookkeeping reasons especially if your business has its own bank account. Until I read this, I was firmly in the “I would never charge/expect or accept payment from/expect to pay my spouse” group. But this makes sense. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2018, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/17 "2018-10-13T02:33:31Z")
> [@senoy](#): > > Personally, I couldn’t ever imagine charging my wife for anything or accepting money from her for anything. Seems weird to me. Everything we have is shared. It seems odd to me too, but I also think that a married couple buying each other Christmas presents out of joint funds is kind of odd too (just in an economical sense). ---
**Author:** ![echoreply](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/echoreply/32/3641_2.png) [@echoreply](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/echoreply)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2018, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/18 "2018-10-13T04:10:29Z")
> [@senoy](#): > > That’s a reason NOT to do it. It becomes a business gain and you pay taxes on it. This is why I would say charge for it, it it’s going to be a habit. I mean, a couple batches of cupcakes isn’t going to trigger an audit. The problem would be if you’re using business supplies, which will be deducted from any income, to then feed your family. ---
**Author:** ![BeeGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5a626/32.png) [@BeeGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeeGee)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2018, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/19 "2018-10-13T04:45:42Z")
Yeah, he’s not paying his wife Amaguri; he’s paying the business Amaguri LLC. He’s also setting an example for any co-workers, cousins, or next door neighbor’s godmother’s stepson who thinks that either of you should be providing freebies for every occasion. He’s a smart cookie. ---
**Author:** ![Dereknocue67](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6de8d8/32.png) [@Dereknocue67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dereknocue67)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2018, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866/20 "2018-10-13T07:52:33Z")
Over the years, I have made numerous woodworking projects for my wife and always demand she pay me for material and labor and she always agrees by saying, “Sure. Just put it on my tab.” According to my accounts receivable ledger, I’m wealthy. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-expect-your-so-to-pay-you-for-a-product/822866.md?page=2)