# Would you laugh at somebody who bought and employed a self-censoring DVD player? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 11, 2004, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512 "2004-04-11T23:32:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/1 "2004-04-11T23:32:35Z")
I would. In fact, I can’t imagine anyone being able to use one without being ridiculed. ---
**Author:** ![Omnipresent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8c91f0/32.png) [@Omnipresent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omnipresent)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/2 "2004-04-11T23:50:34Z")
What the hell are you talking about? ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/3 "2004-04-12T00:17:37Z")
Well, if they had young kids and wanted to control what they saw at home, it is their perrogative. ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/4 "2004-04-12T02:37:13Z")
It might be pointing out the obvious, but if you want to control what the kids see you could… um… Not put in a DVD with questionable content. They have these rating things now… And unless there’s some new option where the DVD player scans ahead several seconds and matches words that sound similar to swear words against a database (besides adding to the price I doubt this is even practical)… I don’t think we’ll have to worry about that. Watch me eat my words as someone links to a product at wal mart or something… ---
**Author:** ![RandomLetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8edcca/32.png) [@RandomLetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandomLetters)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/5 "2004-04-12T03:02:56Z")
Hope your words taste good, because [here is the product link at Walmart.](http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.gsp?cat=62055&dept=3944&product_id=2598456&path=0%3A3944%3A62055%3A95987) ---
**Author:** ![Zap\_Rowsdower](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3da27b/32.png) [@Zap\_Rowsdower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zap_Rowsdower)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/6 "2004-04-12T03:05:04Z")
I would more likely roll my eyes because it would appear to be another instance of parents neglecting there role. Rather than monitoring what their children see they would rather some technology to become the “parent”. ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/7 "2004-04-12T03:38:16Z")
Let’s just say I wouldn’t bother watching movies at his house… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/8 "2004-04-12T03:47:05Z")
So do you guys all have moral objections to movies on TBS or Comedy Central that have been edited for content? I’m not really seeing the difference. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/9 "2004-04-12T04:05:31Z")
I don’t object to nudity or sex or swearing. I DO, however, object to grossout gags and overly explicit depictions of violence. If I had an option to buy a tamed-down version of most popular movies, I would. I’m serious, it’s gotten to the point where I wonder if I’m going to vomit when I watch some scenes. Many filmmakers seem to feel that no film is complete without at least one scene completely covered in blood and/or vomit. I would enjoy watching those movies WITHOUT that scene (which is put in to get that coveted R rating). Fortunately for me, there’s plenty of older movies out on DVD or VHS, which I can rent or buy and watch to my heart’s content. My daughter is 24 now, and perfectly capable of deciding what she wants to watch. When she was in her teens, though, and wanted to watch _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_, I let her watch my copy. But first I warned her about the scene that showed a half-eaten Eddie. Incidentally, she somewhat enjoyed it, though she was rather put off when I insisted that she watch it again, with me, while I recited all the audience participation lines. I didn’t throw anything, though, that’s MY living room and _I_ have to pick it up! ---
**Author:** ![St\_Ides](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@St\_Ides](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St_Ides)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/10 "2004-04-12T04:10:15Z")
> [@Johnny Bravo](#): > > So do you guys all have moral objections to movies on TBS or Comedy Central that have been edited for content? Actually, I do. Removing parts of the movie that are objectionable, usually defeats the purpose of the movie. Sometimes the swearing, drinking and drug use are essential to the movie, and removing them takes away from the movie. If they’re going to show the movie, show it the way it was meant to be seen. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/11 "2004-04-12T04:26:57Z")
If they started programming them to censor stupidity, I might be interested. You know, just put up a quick message saying “5 minute set-up culminating in crotch gag” or “same dumb gag they used in the first two movies, followed by joke about how they’re just recycling old material”. You could watch Austin Powers 3 in under ten minutes with something like that. ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/12 "2004-04-12T04:46:01Z")
> [@RandomLetters](#): > > Hope your words taste good, because [here is the product link at Walmart.](http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.gsp?cat=62055&dept=3944&product_id=2598456&path=0%3A3944%3A62055%3A95987) Damn… the one time I don’t google it… Ignore everything from “And unless” on. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/13 "2004-04-12T06:57:22Z")
yes…yes I would ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/14 "2004-04-12T07:33:42Z")
> [@St\_Ides](#): > > Actually, I do. > > Removing parts of the movie that are objectionable, usually defeats the purpose of the movie. Sometimes the swearing, drinking and drug use are essential to the movie, and removing them takes away from the movie. > > If they’re going to show the movie, show it the way it was meant to be seen. Sometimes, of course, the swearing, drinking, drug use, whatever, is simply put into the movie to show how cool a certain person is. Watch some movies from the 60s and 70s sometime, and laugh at the drug scenes. I think that most of the drinking,drugging, and whoring are simply posturing, not Making An Artistic Statement. Of course, as I stated, my personal edit material would be gratuitous violence, I probably wouldn’t skip over swearing (unless it got to be boring) or drug/alcohol use (unless, again, it got boring). Precious few movies are really Art, and have a Great Statement To Make. Let’s not pretend that they are, all right? Most of them are really just consumer goods, which were created with the express intention of spending as little in the way of resources for the maximum amount of profit. And there’s nothing wrong with that, as long as we aren’t pretending that we are, indeed, getting Fine Art. Wanting to watch a movie without seeing a lot of gore is, in my mind, the equivalent of wanting to eat canned ravioli (one of my guilty pleasures) without a lot of rat shit in it. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/15 "2004-04-12T07:53:53Z")
> [@rjung](#): > > Let’s just say I wouldn’t bother watching movies at his house… I think it’d be even MORE fun to watch movies at his house. You could be the official DVD compensator, shouting “PENIS!!!” or “This is the part when he fucks her in the ass and she begs for more!” at the moments when that word or those scenes are cut out. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/16 "2004-04-12T07:55:28Z")
Indeed, I would laugh, _and_ cluck my tongue. There would probably be some head-shaking involved, too. I mean, I wouldn’t try to _hinder_ you from buying and using such a device. That’s your call, and your right. But I’d still think it was ridiculous. Only if someone tried to force _me_ to use such a player would I start making a fuss. (To put it mildly.) ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/17 "2004-04-12T16:56:11Z")
Wow, you guys are really showing your age (or lack thereof) if you can’t even imagine anyone being upset at hearing “foul language” and preferring to avoid it. If I were in charge of supplying entertainment at an old folks’ home, for instance, you can \*\*\*\* well believe I’d be \*\*\*\*\*\*\* interesting in buying a self-censoring DVD player. (Especially if **Snooooopy** were there. 😃 I’d love to see the reactions that would get.) ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/18 "2004-04-12T17:12:51Z")
How about a self-_un_-censoring DVD player? As if , every so often, you had to clean out all the clogged-up gross scenes and foul language by running them onto another DVD? Would _that_ be a big seller? “Martha, I don’t remember there being so many barf jokes in **Casablanca**.” “Yes, but the sex scenes are better on this edition.” ---
**Author:** ![DaddyTimesTwo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@DaddyTimesTwo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaddyTimesTwo)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/19 "2004-04-12T17:27:38Z")
I wonder what this ClearPlay™ technology would do with _The Passion of the Christ_? Would it play in like 15 minutes, fast-forwearding through the graphic violence? Or would there be many minutes of blacked-out screen? ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2004, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512/20 "2004-04-12T18:34:43Z")
> [@Lynn Bodoni](#): > > My daughter is 24 now, and perfectly capable of deciding what she wants to watch. When she was in her teens, though, and wanted to watch _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_, I let her watch my copy. But first I warned her about the scene that showed a half-eaten Eddie. Incidentally, she somewhat enjoyed it, though she was rather put off when I insisted that she watch it again, with me, while I recited all the audience participation lines. I didn’t throw anything, though, that’s MY living room and _I_ have to pick it up! If I recall, the scene at the dinner table, the chunk of eddie looks esstinally like a giant chicken mcnugget. I didn’t remember it being particulary disgusting looking. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-laugh-at-somebody-who-bought-and-employed-a-self-censoring-dvd-player/239512.md?page=2)