# Would You Let Your Teenager Go To A Hotel With Their Partner Overnight? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 30, 2016, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449 "2016-08-30T00:36:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/21 "2016-08-30T17:09:00Z")
> [@astro](#): > > I get the “they’re going to do it anyway” notes and the desire to be the cool parent, but honestly I think it’s just bad form for a parent to be cooperating with getting teenagers a hotel room to have sex in. I’m not sure I understand this. Why? Teenagers are quite capable of enjoying a healthy sex life. (interesting side note, my high school girlfriend and I once had a hotel room in a distant city we were visiting for an event. We did not have sex.) ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/22 "2016-08-30T17:19:40Z")
> [@astro](#): > > The majority of decent hotels have a minimum age 21-25 policy for registration. Younger than that is normally going to require parents or older adults guaranteeing the room. The majority have an 18 year old minimum. Some hotels have a 21 year old minimum. Holiday Inn is a perfectly respectable chain, and its 18. Hilton is respectable - 18. Now, an individual location might bump up the age. Ft. Lauderdale hotels might have a minimum 25 age over Spring Break for instance. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/23 "2016-08-30T17:20:15Z")
Seems OK, hopefully they will do more then just have sex, perhaps actually explore the place they are staying, but if they just have sex all the time, that’s also exploring. In prude talk that is what a honeymoon is for. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/24 "2016-08-30T17:31:29Z")
My concern wouldn’t be the kids having sex. I figure that ship has sailed and giving them a comfortable and safe place to have sex isn’t a bad thing for anyone. I would be concerned with this idea because of two issues: 1) whether they are inviting other people to the room and 2) whether alcohol or drugs might be involved. I could probably trust some kids of that age on those issues, but others I wouldn’t trust. ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/25 "2016-08-30T17:39:27Z")
I always regret that the first time my gf and I had sex (we were 16, and virgens) was in the back seat of a Dodge. How sweet a hotel room would have been! ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2016, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/26 "2016-08-30T20:06:39Z")
> [@dracoi](#): > > My concern wouldn’t be the kids having sex. I figure that ship has sailed and giving them a comfortable and safe place to have sex isn’t a bad thing for anyone. > > I would be concerned with this idea because of two issues: 1) whether they are inviting other people to the room and 2) whether alcohol or drugs might be involved. I could probably trust some kids of that age on those issues, but others I wouldn’t trust. Like sex, the ship has sailed. If they are going to become impaired, a hotel room is better than driving. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2016, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/27 "2016-08-31T05:20:05Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > I’m not sure I understand this. Why? Teenagers are quite capable of enjoying a healthy sex life. > > (interesting side note, my high school girlfriend and I once had a hotel room in a distant city we were visiting for an event. We did not have sex.) On your side note… I wasn’t go-all-the-way sexually active in high school, but my boyfriend and I did this. It’s not totally uncommon. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2016, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/28 "2016-08-31T05:49:24Z")
Sure because when my daughter, 7 and son, 5 are that age, they will be completely responsible, mature young adults, right? My parenting will essentially be over and I can just watch TV. OK, on more serious note, I hope they will be mature and responsible enough to handle it. We’ll see. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2016, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/29 "2016-08-31T17:41:56Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > Like sex, the ship has sailed. If they are going to become impaired, a hotel room is better than driving. I agree to a limited extent. I’m not all that familiar with drug culture, but I imagine that having the privacy of a hotel room would lead to different patterns of drug use, just like the privacy of the room would lead to different patterns of sex. You might have tons of sex all night long, expecting to sleep it off the next day. No harm done (at least, no more harm than a quickie in the back seat might cause). If you take tons of heroin all night long, expecting to sleep it off the next day, you might not wake up at all. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2016, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/30 "2016-09-02T17:25:58Z")
Playing along hypothetically, if I wanted someone to get better at something I knew would be important to their quality of life I’d help them achieve the means to do it. In a hotel room, w/ space and privacy, they can develop their skills at enjoying sex rather than learning from sex in cars and other stolen moments that it’s a race to orgasm. I developed shit habits and attitudes about sex from not having privacy or space until after I was married and out of the house; I’ve had mostly shit sex most of my adult life as a consequence and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone but especially a young person. STDs can get treated, pregnancies are not the end of the world; so long as they are taking all the precautions they can it’s time to let them be grown-ups. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/31 "2016-09-04T21:55:57Z")
No, I would not allow a hypothetical child of mine to engage in immoral activity. If they intend to pull that shit, they can do it behind my back, like a normal family. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/32 "2016-09-04T23:04:19Z")
I’d be more worried about drug and alcohol use by party crashers than I would be about sexual activity. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/33 "2016-09-04T23:14:57Z")
He can join the army at 17 but the real danger is in those hotel rooms with his girlfriend… ---
**Author:** ![BetsQ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@BetsQ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BetsQ)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2016, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/34 "2016-09-04T23:50:32Z")
I can’t imagine letting a high school kid get a hotel room with another kid for any reason. (My oldest is 14 now - maybe he’ll mature more in 3 years than I expect?) Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk ---
**Author:** ![Poto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ab992/32.png) [@Poto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poto)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2016, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/35 "2016-09-05T00:14:01Z")
One of mine was smart, mature and finished their undergrad degree before turning 21. I trust this child. ---
**Author:** ![Desert\_Nomad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desert_nomad/32/177_2.png) [@Desert\_Nomad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desert_Nomad)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2016, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/36 "2016-09-05T01:02:36Z")
When I was 17, I spent a couple of months wandering around Asia. No big deal at all for the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Elemenopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b5e925/32.png) [@Elemenopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elemenopy)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2016, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/37 "2016-09-05T06:01:01Z")
Not overly shocked or uncomfortable. My eldest is seventeen, and if she wanted to stay in a hotel with a close friend of either gender, (at least with some overarching reason to be traveling), I’d be ok. And not to be the “cool” parent, but just a combo of realism, yet not making assumptions, and acknowledging the onset of adulthood and its choices. ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2016, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/38 "2016-09-05T12:54:14Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > One of the weird things about this board is its odd permissiveness over teenage sex. Sure, it happens, but you don’t encourage it, or it’ll happen more. Maybe because people don’t see teenage sex as a problem to begin with, hence aren’t worried that it might happen more? IIRC, Americans (and in fact French people too) have their first intercourse on average at 17 (and this age hasn’t changed in a long while), making teenage sex a pretty normal thing. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2016, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/39 "2016-09-05T13:39:49Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > He can join the army at 17 but the real danger is in those hotel rooms with his girlfriend… Yes, the army accepts 17 year olds–but it keeps them under _very_ strict supervision. Hotels…not so much 🙂 Some 17 year olds in the army will be careless and not check whether their weapon is loaded. Some 17 year olds in a hotel room will be careless and not use a condom. I wonder which of these scenarios is most likely? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2016, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449/40 "2016-09-06T03:51:08Z")
> [@BetsQ](#): > > I can’t imagine letting a high school kid get a hotel room with another kid for any reason. (My oldest is 14 now - maybe he’ll mature more in 3 years than I expect?) > Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk The first time I ever stayed in a motel, period, I was 13 years old and shared the room with three other girls the same age. It was the school band trip. And there were chaperones all over the place. I think the most outrageous thing that happened in our room was that we were using the beds as trampolines. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-let-your-teenager-go-to-a-hotel-with-their-partner-overnight/764449.md?page=3)