# Would you like this as a wedding favor? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 19, 2009, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008 "2009-01-19T16:58:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2009, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/41 "2009-01-20T18:02:24Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > Edible is popular for this reason: Since it is traditional for the food not to be served until the bride and groom are at the reception and seated and since it is also traditional for the bride and groom to take forever getting pictures taken at the chapel it is therefore traditional for the guests to starve to death while waiting. A well-planned modern wedding will not result in guests starving while waiting for the wedding party. The period before they arrive at the reception is when guests _should_ be served hors d’oeuvres and aperitifs! If the guests are made to starve then, as the lolcats say: ur doin it rong. ---
**Author:** ![purple\_haze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/db5fbb/32.png) [@purple\_haze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purple_haze)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2009, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/42 "2009-01-20T18:20:38Z")
It’s not necessary to give a gift to your guests at all. The book is a cute idea, but in the end it’s just another thing that I would probably sell at my next garage sale, re-gift, or donate to the Salvation Army. The last wedding we attended was my cousin’s, and the best keepsakes that I took from that evening were the photos that we have, along with some great memories. I don’t need anything more than that. If you’re firm on giving the book, don’t inscribe them with anything. That sounds too time-consuming and most people won’t appreiate the extra effort unless they are very close to you. After all, how can you re-gift something that’s inscribed? ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2009, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/43 "2009-01-20T18:53:10Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Would you at least insist on some sort of recognition of the gift? When I spent tens of hours on a handmade quilt for you it would be nice to know it arrived. (And I would expect a hand-written card, even though I couldn’t sell it for \>$1K.) Handmade quilts fall into the “future heirloom” category. I don’t think that one can put a price tag on that sort of gift. And it does, indeed, deserve a handwritten card at the very least. If it was shipped, then the recipient needs to first phone the giver and say it arrived safely, and the giver thanked profusely. Then the recipient needs to send a card or letter, again expressing thanks. Of course, I’ve tried to make a couple of quilts myself, and I have made several baby blankets and afghans, and so I might be biased. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2009, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/44 "2009-01-20T22:49:00Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Would you at least insist on some sort of recognition of the gift? When I spent tens of hours on a handmade quilt for you it would be nice to know it arrived. (And I would expect a hand-written card, even though I couldn’t sell it for \>$1K.) A handmade gift is a bit different. And you can substitute “hours and hours of painstaking effort” for “lots of money”. In general, though, I just hate the idea of a thank you card. If you got them a gift, and they got you a gift, thank you cards are an unnecessary extra step and a waste of paper. I suppose it might be a bit different for weddings, but I got the last couple whose wedding I attended some towels. It was the only thing left on the registry that I could afford. I got a handwritten card two weeks later thanking me for the lovely towels. I mean, it was nice, but “we dried ourselves with them all week” just sounds ridiculous. ---
**Author:** ![Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bites_when_provoked/32/18073_2.png) [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bites_When_Provoked)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2009, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/45 "2009-01-21T04:26:30Z")
> [@Free\_Range\_Otter](#): > > And given some of the feedback in this thread, we may just put in a printed bookmark instead of any kind of note so that if a guest really doesn’t like the book at all, they can donate it or regift it without worrying about removing a sticker or a handwritten note. Personally - and I realise I may be in the minority - I’d prefer to get the bookmark without the book. Even re-gifting the book would make me feel guilty, so I’d probably try to avoid even taking it home in the first place … but I can always find use for a bookmark, and it doesn’t take up space. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2009, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/46 "2009-01-21T16:21:02Z")
> [@tumbleddown](#): > > A well-planned modern wedding will not result in guests starving while waiting for the wedding party. The period before they arrive at the reception is when guests _should_ be served hors d’oeuvres and aperitifs! > > If the guests are made to starve then, as the lolcats say: ur doin it rong. Then every wedding I’ve ever been to did it wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Free\_Range\_Otter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ba8739/32.png) [@Free\_Range\_Otter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Free_Range_Otter)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2009, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/47 "2009-01-21T19:40:03Z")
I appreciate all of the feedback! I can assure any of you who might be invited (which would be quite a coincidence) that our guests will be provided with hors d’oeuvres and beverages immediately after the ceremony; they will not go hungry! I’ve only been to one of those weddings where the guests don’t have anything to eat until the wedding party arrived, and that was kind of annoying. We’ve decided to go ahead with the books, and we’ll have to think about how or where to get the bookmarks. We may just print them up ourselves on some nice paper at Kinko’s if that would be cheapest. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2009, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/48 "2009-01-21T20:01:43Z")
> [@Free\_Range\_Otter](#): > > For those who tend to not like a gift if it isn’t edible, what is the primary reason? Is it because you don’t want more “stuff” to junk up your home? > > If you received a little book, would it make a difference if there were a hand-written note inside instead of a sticker? I like the idea of a hand-written note - nothing long, just “Dear so-and-so, we are so happy that you are able to be here with us today, and hope we can share some of our happiness with you. Love, the Otters”. Ms. Otter doesn’t like this idea because of all of the hand-writing, and the fact that she would be the one most likely to do it since her writing is much better than mine… Pretty much. I have more than enough stuff. And the stuff I want to add to my stuff should be stuff I pick out because I want to invest the space in my life in that particular stuff. The note makes it worse. I can’t throw it out if it has a note…but really, I have issues throwing out anything - landfill, carbon footprint…books being particular guilt ridden because they are books … don’t burden me with it, I’ll leave it behind and let you bear the guilt of filling landfills. (Give each table chickens from Heiffer International). ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2009, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/49 "2009-01-21T20:24:38Z")
I know you guys already decided but I would love the book as a wedding favor. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2009, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/50 "2009-01-21T21:24:36Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > (Give each table chickens from Heiffer International). And let them know by having [these](http://www.mcphee.com/items/11301.html) at every place. No one in their right mind would regift that. ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2009, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/51 "2009-01-22T04:05:19Z")
Personally, I don’t quite get the idea of needing to give a favour / gift for your guests. If you must, what would be really nice would be something relevant to how you and your partner met, or something genuinely useful. For example - my wife and I met in a casino - I would consider giving a $5 casino chip as a gift. Maybe you met on a golf course, in which case you may want to give a boxed ball set stamped with your names. I tried to convince one of my colleagues to give a thumbdrive as a wedding favour. For a few reasons… 1. She was budgeting $10- $12 per favour, which she could have bulk bought a flash drive. 2. Here, photos are taken prior to the wedding - so I wanted her to load the wedding photos to the drive for guests to take home and peruse (and also to set the photos to music in a ppt presentation). If you have time, manpower and the organisational skills maybe you could also add some of the photos taken at the reception and then give it to guests as they leave. In general, if you **must** give a gift / favour, I would really love to receive something that had special relevance to the couple (maybe explain the relevance in the speeches?) which could also make a cool story. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2009, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008/52 "2009-01-22T05:45:25Z")
> [@Free\_Range\_Otter](#): > > We’ve decided to go ahead with the books, and we’ll have to think about how or where to get the bookmarks. We may just print them up ourselves on some nice paper at Kinko’s if that would be cheapest. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding and picking those as favors! I know if I were attending and received that, not only would I think it was an absolutely lovely idea, but I’d keep it too. Of course, that might be because I’m another Peanuts fan. 😉 Good luck on the big upcoming day!! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-like-this-as-a-wedding-favor/482008.md?page=2)