# Would you rather wrestle a chimpanzee raised among humans or a wild alligator?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-rather-wrestle-a-chimpanzee-raised-among-humans-or-a-wild-alligator/730712>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [September 11, 2015, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-rather-wrestle-a-chimpanzee-raised-among-humans-or-a-wild-alligator/730712 "2015-09-11T20:57:28Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![rainy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@rainy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rainy)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2015, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-rather-wrestle-a-chimpanzee-raised-among-humans-or-a-wild-alligator/730712/41 "2015-09-15T19:12:44Z")

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> [@thelurkinghorror](#):
>
> The alligator is not cognizant of the location of my testicles, so I would rather fight them.

Fight your testicles? Was that an option?

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**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2015, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-rather-wrestle-a-chimpanzee-raised-among-humans-or-a-wild-alligator/730712/42 "2015-09-15T19:26:52Z")

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> [@rainy](#):
>
> Fight your testicles? Was that an option?

See **Lemur866** ’s post #10.

ETA: I don’t know if a Lemur is someone I want to watch my back during the planet of the apes. I can only hope that the lemurs see how [chimps treat their primate cousins](http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2007/02/070222-chimps-spears.html).

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**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2015, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-rather-wrestle-a-chimpanzee-raised-among-humans-or-a-wild-alligator/730712/43 "2015-09-15T19:35:21Z")

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Yeah the obvious answer is Alligator, at least that way you have a chance and you can outsmart it. Chimps are too smart, strong, and brutal, you just won’t have a chance. Echoing what someone else already said at least if you wrestle the alligator you might have a face and genitals left after it’s over.

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