# Would you sacrifice the love of your life to spare 10,000 strangers by cancer? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 4, 2011, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504 "2011-10-04T01:26:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2011, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/141 "2011-10-06T20:45:25Z")
No way. I don’t believe in love anymore, but if I loved her – I’m assuming a sexual or “romantic” kind of love – I don’t give a shit about some strangers. Hell, I’d probably dislike most of them anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Lasciel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e79b87/32.png) [@Lasciel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lasciel)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2011, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/142 "2011-10-06T22:53:13Z")
First answer: Get thee behind me, demon. Second answer: They’re ALREADY DYING. All I have to do is nothing, and the status stays quo: my husband loves me still, they’re dying of whatever they’re dying of still. That’s really the safest option. To be even further on the safe side, I’d make sure to tell hubby about that fun meeting I had with the devil as soon as I saw him again, so Old Scratch couldn’t hit him up and twist things around. Hubby knows I’m a selfish bitch, and that I love him more than life, so I don’t think he’ll have any problems with it. If he were the type to have problems with that kind of decision-making process, he wouldn’t be the love of my life. All that said, even if it were not that they were already sick/dying, (ie, if I were inflicting death on 10,000 in order to keep him) I’d still pick husband loving me. He’d be much less ok with callousness by commission rather than omission, but I think he’d still be cool with it overall. ---
**Author:** ![Renee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/renee/32/287_2.png) [@Renee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renee)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2011, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/143 "2011-10-06T23:00:45Z")
At first I was all: of course I’d sacrifice my love to save all those people. But then y’all convinced me that the whole deal with the devil thing was a non-starter, so I guess in this scenario they die. However, I’m not on board with the idea that nothing in the entire world is more important than my happiness or that of those I love, even if I love them a lot. If I could be sure that this was a legit deal, then yes, I see no way that I could still consider myself a good person if I refused it. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2011, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/144 "2011-10-06T23:11:03Z")
> [@Jaledin](#): > > No way. I don’t believe in love anymore, but if I loved her – I’m assuming a sexual or “romantic” kind of love – I don’t give a shit about some strangers. Hell, I’d probably dislike most of them anyway. The OP doesn’t specify romantic love. It could be your dearest friend, your most beloved child, your older brother, your mom. ---
**Author:** ![Hennessy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hennessy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hennessy)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2011, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/145 "2011-10-06T23:19:22Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > I would personally murder 10,000 to get her back. Love it ---
**Author:** ![brittekland](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@brittekland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brittekland)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2011, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/146 "2011-10-06T23:28:02Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > The OP doesn’t specify romantic love. It could be your dearest friend, your most beloved child, your older brother, your mom. Then only if I get to pick who it is. 😃 I’ll pick my friend who thinks everything I say is a joke and just laugh it off thinking it’s a practical joke of mine, again. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/147 "2011-10-07T00:24:46Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > I think it’s important to love, and love fully, and also to stay centered and say “There are sacrifices too big for me to make for this love.” That may include sacrifices of money or wellbeing, or it may include sacrifices of other people’s money or wellbeing. Everyone might have a different point, but everyone probably should have a point at which they say, “Hmm, this is too much.” By his own account, Nelson Mandela ended apartheid at the expense of his relationship with his wife and children. Martin Luther King, Jr. led the civil rights movement at the expense of his own life and a grieving family he loved dearly. As a person who admires these individuals as representative of the best of humanity, the ideal that I strive for, I decided long ago that one thing I would not do is sacrifice my relationship with those I love. It might be selfish, but everybody has a limit, and that’s mine. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/148 "2011-10-07T00:58:39Z")
The punchline: Unbeknownst to you, due to a cancellation, your loved one was squeezed into a last minute appointment with their doctor for an annual checkup. They are backed up for months so (s)he jumped at the chance. The doctor notices a strange lump on his/her anus and sends them immediately to the hospital for a biopsy. That very afternoon, while you are chatting with the Devil, S/HE’S IN THE CANCER WARD - DYING OF ASS CANCER! ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/149 "2011-10-07T01:36:40Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Qin, your affectation for using British spellings has led you astray. I don’t think you mean the word _daemon_ above. You mean _demon_. A _daemon_, in Greek myth, is a supernatural entity intermediate between men and gods, and not at all all malevolent. (At least, no more likely to be malevolent than any random god or human.) Mephistopheles is a _demon_ – a fallen angel, an immortal spirit in rebellion against the capital-g God. He’s made of malice. Hell, he’s the Maker of Malice. While it’s true that _demon_ descends from _daemon_, and _daemon_ is an archaic spelling of the other term, calling Old Scratch a daemon is all kinds of wrong no matter which side of the Pond you live on. > > Okay, that’s the grammar fascist part of me. The rest of me is just here to say this: > > Seriously, dude, it’s Mephistopheles. If you’re a Christian, your only reasonable option when he offers you a deal is to say _Get thee behind me, Adversary of God and Man_, followed by a _Help! Jesus, or at least Michael, if you could come save my ass, that’d be great!_ Alright sorry for my improper word usage. Well if I really did saw a demon, yeah I’d probably run and scream and pray, and certainly not make a deal either way. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/150 "2011-10-07T02:20:14Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > No you don’t. I mean, I’m sure you love him and all, but if your definition of love is that you’re eventually going to break up anyway so it isn’t that big a big deal if it ends now you don’t understand the “as much as anyone possibly can” part of your statement. I would not necessarily garrote 10,000 random people on the street or anything to keep my relationship the way it is but a bunch of people who are already at death’s door? They can keep on knocking. I’m not going to give up the most important thing in my life to undo what nature has already done. Just because someone says that those 10,000 people can die does NOT mean I love my bf less than them. It just means that I value the lives of those 10,000 people more than my own or his own immediate happiness. I don’t understand how anyone COULD possibly see their own relationship’s happiness as being more important than the lives of 10,000 cancer patients who would go on to live happy, healthy lives, and a lot more love would be created in the universe than the love I would lose by making the deal. I would HOPE that my boyfriend would do the same thing in the same position. I wouldn’t want to date someone who would send 10,000 people to their slow, cancer-ridden deaths just because he wanted me to be happy. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/151 "2011-10-07T02:20:26Z")
Absolutely not. The first rule of making deals with the devil is _don’t make deals with the devil_. You know he’s out to screw you. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/152 "2011-10-07T02:32:10Z")
Update to those of you who care. Just had this text conversation with my BF: Me: Hey Eric, just out of curiosity… if breaking up with me forever and making me hate you could save the lives of 10,000 cancer ridden people, would you do it? 9:21 PM Me: Know that they would live happy, healthy, full lives and I would hate you forever and ever no matter what you did. 9:22 PM Eric : Wow interesting question. I would be very sad that you hate me and that we wouldn’t be together anymore. But dang, 10,000 people get to live! I would probably do it to save so many people but it would be very hard for me to move on. 9:29 PM Me: YAY! I feel the same way 🙂 9:30 PM We are so perfect for eachother! Both willing to throw eachother under the bus if it means saving the lives of 10,000 cancer patients. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/153 "2011-10-07T06:42:28Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > What don’t you buy? I’m not claiming that there are persons’ destined to be together, their coupling ordained by the Moirae. The love of your life is the person you currently love most. This - that it’s possible to tell who you love the most. _For the sake of this thread_ I’ve been assuming that’s my wife and my daughter comes second - or at least, assuming Mephisto could work it out. But truly, I couldn’t tell you which I love more. > [@](#): > > Um…does your wife know you fall in love with someone new once a month? Of course. But she knows they’re not consequential, too. Certainly not something that affects how I feel about her in the slightest. > [@](#): > > If not, don’t tell her. I don’t have that kind of marriage. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/154 "2011-10-07T15:01:50Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > Just because someone says that those 10,000 people can die does NOT mean I love my bf less than them. No, it doesn’t. Saying, “Eh, probably this was going to end anyway so why not?” is what made it seem not quite like love. If you can say that you would walk away knowing you did what is best for the world around you that is one thing, but to say that eventually one of you is going to tire of the other and at least this way you get to be all heroic about the breakup is very different. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/155 "2011-10-07T15:13:32Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > This - that it’s possible to tell who you love the most. Forty-six percept of the voters in [this poll](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=622011&highlight=sharks) seemed to think otherwise. > [@](#): > > _For the sake of this thread_ I’ve been assuming that’s my wife and my daughter comes second - or at least, assuming Mephisto could work it out. But truly, I couldn’t tell you which I love more.Of course. But she knows they’re not consequential, too. Certainly not something that affects how I feel about her in the slightest. I don’t have a child, so for me it’s easy: the person I love most is my wife. I like most of my siblings, but the second spot is also easy: my baby sister. It’s not till the third spot that I have any trouble. And I don’t think I’m odd in that. ---
**Author:** ![Khendrask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3e96dc/32.png) [@Khendrask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khendrask)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/156 "2011-10-07T15:30:09Z")
Strangers? Nope. Not at all. I’d probably not bother for anyone close to me either. Of course, there are no people close to me so shrug. ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/157 "2011-10-07T18:04:12Z")
**Skald** , you’re slipping. This is the easiest choice you’ve ever offered. No. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/158 "2011-10-07T18:41:27Z")
> [@Suburban\_Plankton](#): > > **Skald** , you’re slipping. This is the easiest choice you’ve ever offered. > > No. Too bad I didn’t make it a poll; we could have compared this thread with the vegan one to see which was more lopsided. ETA: the big flaw in this hypo is that the offer’s coming from the Devil; even people who might feel obliged to take the offer otherwise are put off (and SHOULD be put off) by the certainty that anything he suggests should be declined. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/159 "2011-10-07T18:41:30Z")
> [@Suburban\_Plankton](#): > > **Skald** , you’re slipping. This is the easiest choice you’ve ever offered. > > No. Disagree. This is the only one of Skald’s polls that I’ve participated in that I actually had to think about. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504/160 "2011-10-07T19:03:30Z")
If I were Satan, instead of making the chooser go to a bunch of funerals after the fact, I would make them first listen to a large group of the ten thousand and their relatives plead for their lives. If they chose to keep the relationship going and let the 10,000 die, I would then give their beloved a DVD of the chooser coldly turning down the pleas just so they could stay in the relationship. I would also send copies of the DVD to some of the more unstable and violent relatives of the dead, along with the chooser’s home address and place of work. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-sacrifice-the-love-of-your-life-to-spare-10-000-strangers-by-cancer/598504.md?page=9)