# Would you socialize with an anti-vaxxer that you kind of have to socialize with? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 25, 2015, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923 "2015-03-25T03:54:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/61 "2015-03-26T09:35:27Z")
Quite frankly I’ve only been sort of asked this one time and it was someone asking if our family got the annual flu shot. I said just my wife because shes around alot more kids. Other times I just mention that we are more careful with vaccines and asked more questions than before. But our kids have all the required vaccinations. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/62 "2015-03-26T12:16:27Z")
> [@CaptainAmerica\_1987](#): > > Yeah who needs that immune system right. :rolleyes: This comment indicates that you have no idea how vaccines work. Vaccines are literally using parts from (or completely dead) viruses to train your immune system to recognize and destroy them in the future. Comments about how you would rather use your immune system than a vaccine indicate you haven’t done even a tiny amount of research on the subject as this is literally in the first paragraph of the [wikipedia article about vaccines](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaccines). ---
**Author:** ![Sarahfeena](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarahfeena/32/519_2.png) [@Sarahfeena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarahfeena)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/63 "2015-03-26T14:47:36Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Vaccinating your kids to contribute to the herd immunity that protects all of us isn’t just a personal preference, though. > > Maybe that’s the disconnect here; I truly believe that antivaxxers ARE doing real harm to society. So do I. But, people do harm to society all the time in a myriad of ways. I think the Randian Libertarian down the block is doing harm to society. I think the mail carrier who idles his truck on my block for a half hour every day is doing harm to society. I think I might have done harm to society when I went to work with a bad cold a few weeks ago. We all do harm to society all the time. Just because vaccines are your personal hobby horse, it doesn’t necessarily mean that being an anti-vaxxer is really doing more than the garden-variety, thoughtless, stupid, or misguided harm that we all do every day. Being evil is one thing, being mistaken is another, and this guy is mistaken. He thinks he’s doing the right thing, just as much as you do. It’s something we all live with. ---
**Author:** ![Learjeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/94ad74/32.png) [@Learjeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Learjeff)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/64 "2015-03-26T14:57:14Z")
Get over it, and get over yourself. I agree that anti-vax is ignorant, socially irresponsible, and dangerous. But then, so is religion, and I can hang out with religious people and respect their right to their opinions. In addition to having beliefs, people are PEOPLE and deserve some respect, and have other gifts to offer. Finally, a little lesson I occasionally have to remind myself, from Bertrand Russell. The things we get the most heated about are usually the things that we don’t have rational reasons for. If we have good reasons, then we can present them dispassionately. We get upset when we can’t present our reasons clearly, but just KNOW WE ARE RIGHT. Actually, I have to remind myself of that a lot, especially when spending time with my Fox-watching parents (whom I love dearly but sheesh!) ---
**Author:** ![Learjeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/94ad74/32.png) [@Learjeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Learjeff)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/65 "2015-03-26T14:58:14Z")
> [@Sarahfeena](#): > > So do I. But, people do harm to society all the time in a myriad of ways. I think the Randian Libertarian down the block is doing harm to society. I think the mail carrier who idles his truck on my block for a half hour every day is doing harm to society. I think I might have done harm to society when I went to work with a bad cold a few weeks ago. We all do harm to society all the time. Just because vaccines are your personal hobby horse, it doesn’t necessarily mean that being an anti-vaxxer is really doing more than the garden-variety, thoughtless, stupid, or misguided harm that we all do every day. Being evil is one thing, being mistaken is another, and this guy is mistaken. He thinks he’s doing the right thing, just as much as you do. It’s something we all live with. Well put, and right on point. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/66 "2015-03-26T16:33:53Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > You do know that the SDMB is, specifically, a _debate_ board, right? Huh, I was not aware. So in a thread titled, “Pictures of my new kitten” I’m supposed to go in and say, “You are wrong those aren’t kittens.”? Also the only way I could go to an anti-vaxxers house is to burn it down hopefully with them in it so they don’t murder the world with their super-germs. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2015, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/67 "2015-03-26T18:19:55Z")
Oh, wow. Two things I hate all at once: anti-vaxxers, and forced fake socializing with people I work with. > [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > And the second anti-vaxxers stop destroying herd immunity and infecting other people, I will go back to my usual “live and let live” attitude. > > I hadn’t realized that I was coming across as “holier-than-thou” - that is not my attitude. I don’t think I’m better than anti-vaxxers; I’m an online and real life vaccine crusader, and this is a cause that I am passionate about. My husband’s boss is the enemy, not someone I look down on. > > I also think that there is a social contract, the anti-vaxxers are breaking it, and should have social consequences as a result. You shouldn’t be able to let your kids free ride on everyone else’s doing the right thing with no consequences, and one of the consequences might be that your family are not welcome everywhere and not everyone will want to socialize with you if you refuse to do the right thing and vaccinate. People don’t understand civil disobedience anymore. When you do something wrong, whether it’s breaking a law, or a social contract, you are supposed to take the consequences. Stealth anti-vaxxers are probably actually less moral than the Jenny McCarthyites, who at least make their views known (and by doing so also expose them to the scrutiny that helps fence sitters see that bridges are not made of paper). > [@madmonk28](#): > > For me, I guess it would be like having to socialize with a rabid bigot, or someone who avidly supports terrorism to advance religious beliefs; if they don’t bring it up, I’d be willing to show up and nod politely, but I’d keep it to a minimum. We’re talking about people who do real harm to society, not people with just different opinions. This is where the party ends for me too. Besides, anti-vaxxers who socialize with a lot of other anti-vaxxers through an organization, or a church, can harbor a slightly mutated strain of something that can infect a vaccinated person. It’s often been said that a vaccinated person in a low vaccination area is at higher risk than an unvaccinated person in a high vaccination area, and it’s quite true. I hope that baby is OK. And BTW, it is possible that everyone who received a shot from the same nurse who came by work got sick, and everyone who didn’t get the shot did not, because _the nurse had an infection_ she passed on to everyone. It’s also possible, albeit less likely that there was something wrong with the vaccine, but it’s doubtful it would be a single vial (unless that nurse really screwed up, or did something malicious), and you’d hear about a recall. None of that means that vaccinations don’t work, make you sick in and of themselves, or cause autism, diabetes, MS, lupus, blah, blah, blah. It’s also possible that confirmation bias was at work. The boss probably didn’t track who got the flu later in the year. Anyway, I vote for not going to the party. Say you have to go to synagogue services that night. It always works for me. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/68 "2015-03-27T04:26:43Z")
> [@Learjeff](#): > > Get over it, and get over yourself. > > I agree that anti-vax is ignorant, socially irresponsible, and dangerous. But then, so is religion, and I can hang out with religious people and respect their right to their opinions. > > In addition to having beliefs, people are PEOPLE and deserve some respect, and have other gifts to offer. > > Finally, a little lesson I occasionally have to remind myself, from Bertrand Russell. The things we get the most heated about are usually the things that we don’t have rational reasons for. If we have good reasons, then we can present them dispassionately. We get upset when we can’t present our reasons clearly, but just KNOW WE ARE RIGHT. Actually, I have to remind myself of that a lot, especially when spending time with my Fox-watching parents (whom I love dearly but sheesh!) Good points. Also, whatever happened to just live and let live? Why being so judgemental? ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/69 "2015-03-27T05:01:24Z")
Well, you kind of have to, don’t you? Wait, he’s an anti-vaxxer? … ☹ He’s a menace to society then. There was a time I would have been polite about that, but herd immunity has fallen far enough my attitude has changed. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/70 "2015-03-27T07:27:55Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Also, whatever happened to just live and let live? These idiots _killed someone_, that’s what happened. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/71 "2015-03-27T07:58:09Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > Anyway, I vote for not going to the party. Say you have to go to synagogue services that night. It always works for me. QFT. That excuse has gotten me out of MORE Christmas parties… ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/72 "2015-03-27T10:53:04Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > …Maybe that’s the disconnect here; I truly believe that antivaxxers ARE doing real harm to society. That was my point. It’s like going to a party and knowing your SO’s boss is a member of NAMBLA. I guess as long as he doesn’t bring it up, I could get through the obligation. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/73 "2015-03-27T12:55:59Z")
> [@Sarahfeena](#): > > So do I. But, people do harm to society all the time in a myriad of ways. I think the Randian Libertarian down the block is doing harm to society. I think the mail carrier who idles his truck on my block for a half hour every day is doing harm to society. I think I might have done harm to society when I went to work with a bad cold a few weeks ago. We all do harm to society all the time. Just because vaccines are your personal hobby horse, it doesn’t necessarily mean that being an anti-vaxxer is really doing more than the garden-variety, thoughtless, stupid, or misguided harm that we all do every day. Being evil is one thing, being mistaken is another, and this guy is mistaken. He thinks he’s doing the right thing, just as much as you do. It’s something we all live with. This. I would go, and talk about other subjects. But if you are a vaccine crusader, don’t go. It will be too awkward, and may well do more harm than not going. You can come down with food poisoning that night, or have a prior engagement. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2015, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923/74 "2015-03-27T13:17:53Z")
So it is fine to work for an anti-vaxxer and take home a paycheck, but not socialize with them for one night? I submit if you and your husband are truly committed then he shouldn’t even be working for the anti-vaxxer. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-socialize-with-an-anti-vaxxer-that-you-kind-of-have-to-socialize-with/715923.md?page=3)