# Would you wear a kilt if you were not Scottish? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 3, 2012, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287 "2012-01-03T20:15:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/41 "2012-01-04T04:50:59Z")
> [@PaulParkhead](#): > > We’d lob haggis in your general direction, before soaking you in cheap blended whisky and setting you alight. Which would make for an interesting smell. > > Seriously? No-one would care. Wear a kilt, of whatever tartan you like. If you feel you must. Hah. Being a Scot imported to Canada at a young age, I was always asked “Do you have a tartan?” “What clan are you from?” “Is your clan from the lowlands or the highlands?” Fucked if I know? Who the fuck in Scotland even keeps track of these things? Certainly not my family. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/42 "2012-01-04T04:54:50Z")
> [@Malthus](#): > > Also, doesn’t Scotland have ferocious midges? I read that as ferocious _midgets_. Now I have a mental image of very tiny Scotsmen (maybe some Scottish variety of a leprechaun) running up to you and under your kilt, then jumping up and grabbing your unprotected junk… ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/43 "2012-01-04T04:55:19Z")
I’m about as far from Scottish as you can be, but I actually have worn a kilt. :eek: Used to do some fencing and dressup at ren-fairs and the like when I was younger. -XT ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/44 "2012-01-04T04:56:00Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > I read that as ferocious _midgets_. Now I have a mental image of very tiny Scotsmen (maybe some Scottish variety of a leprechaun) running up to you and under your kilt, then jumping up and grabbing your unprotected junk… Like post 29? ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/45 "2012-01-04T04:58:58Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Like post 29? Dammit! :smack: ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/46 "2012-01-04T04:59:59Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Hah. > > Being a Scot imported to Canada at a young age, I was always asked “Do you have a tartan?” “What clan are you from?” “Is your clan from the lowlands or the highlands?” > > Fucked if I know? Who the fuck in Scotland even keeps track of these things? Certainly not my family. I guess there are people in Scotland who keep track of such things, but I doubt they could field a basketball team. Or a shinty team. On edit: Did you ever get asked where you learned to speak English? I did, in the US. Only twice in three years, so I don’t want this to seem like a “stupid Americans” rant, but still. ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/47 "2012-01-04T05:10:44Z")
> [@xtisme](#): > > I’m about as far from Scottish as you can be, but I actually have worn a kilt. :eek: Used to do some fencing and dressup at ren-fairs and the like when I was younger. > > -XT Is a kilt useful for fencing? I mean, I’ve never fenced and I’ve never worn a kilt but the garment wouldn’t necessarily be my first choice for protection if I were to engage in swordfights. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/48 "2012-01-04T05:21:50Z")
> [@PaulParkhead](#): > > On edit: Did you ever get asked where you learned to speak English? I did, in the US. Only twice in three years, so I don’t want this to seem like a “stupid Americans” rant, but still. Well, in all fairness I came here at (not quite) 6 years old, but was instantly asked by classmates to “speak Scottish” for them. I had no clue that they apparently thought “Scottish” was a language, and they had no clue that I perfectly understood and spoke English, just like them. The closest “Scottish” aphorism I could give them was “cheerio!” ---
**Author:** ![Shakester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shakester/32/437_2.png) [@Shakester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shakester)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/49 "2012-01-04T05:40:42Z")
I am of Scottish descent, but I look terrible in a kilt. I can get away with skinny legs in shorts, but I just can’t wear a kilt. I have tried. I wish I _could_ wear a kilt, but for me, sadly, no. ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/50 "2012-01-04T05:43:30Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Well, in all fairness I came here at (not quite) 6 years old, but was instantly asked by classmates to “speak Scottish” for them. I had no clue that they apparently thought “Scottish” was a language, and they had no clue that I perfectly understood and spoke English, just like them. > > The closest “Scottish” aphorism I could give them was “cheerio!” It comes back to me now - you came from Motherwell, originally, IIRC. That’s per the “Scottish Dopefest” thread, which needs to be resurrected, in the interests of actually having a Scottish Dopefest. I can forgive 6 year olds some ignorance, but I’d have said “Cheerio, by the way.” The people who commented on my excellent command of the English language didn’t have the excuse of being kids. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/51 "2012-01-04T05:43:35Z")
By the way: “If it’s no Scottish, it’s crap!” ---
**Author:** ![penultima\_thule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penultima_thule/32/3833_2.png) [@penultima\_thule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/penultima_thule)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/52 "2012-01-04T09:01:14Z")
Being in a pipes and drums band I used to wear one regularly, probably a couple of times a month. But that was a while ago. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/53 "2012-01-04T11:13:56Z")
Sure, I have and I would again. Then again, I spend a lot of summer wearing a kikoi (sarong), so it’s no big stretch. Also, I have zero respect for the made-up rules about clan tartans. I’d wear any tartan that caught my eye. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 11:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/54 "2012-01-04T11:15:32Z")
Does my school uniform count? It was that Stuart with the white background… ---
**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/55 "2012-01-04T11:31:27Z")
Thanks for reminding me. I really must go to [this place](http://maps.google.com/?ll=59.335039,18.0282&spn=0.005778,0.013797&hnear=Stockholm,+Stockholm+County,+Sweden&t=m&z=16&vpsrc=6&layer=c&cbll=59.335011,18.028394&panoid=lyzMltF0HF6Ws-fLElngiw&cbp=12,236.23,,1,-0.18) and buy me one (or wait until the next time I go to Scotland and get one at [Lidl](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lidl)). ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/56 "2012-01-04T12:10:57Z")
My best friend is of Scot descent and at his wedding (I was best man) we wore kilts. Weird, but true. I was in my 30s but I looked like 16 or something. Don’t know why. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/57 "2012-01-04T12:29:24Z")
I have friends who do. Pepper Mill has expressed a desire to see me in a kilt\* (she likes my legs), so one of these days I’m going to have to finally buy a Utilikilt and put it on. \*In the same way I like to see her in a corset ---
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/58 "2012-01-04T13:27:46Z")
> [@Malthus](#): > > I dunno, the scottish kilts I’ve seen show bare legs between the socks and the bottom of the kilt. I can’t imagine that being all that warm on a blustery wet day; but then, I’m used to _Canadian_ winters. 😉 > > Edit: like these. > > [http://www.lindaclifford.com/Kilts.html](http://www.lindaclifford.com/Kilts.html) The socks usually come up to just below the knee. Bear in mind though, the vast majority of people who have worn a kilt in Scotland, have worn it to a wedding, so not much in the way of tramping over windswept, midge-infested moorland. ---
**Author:** ![Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/43a26b/32.png) [@Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pine_Fresh_Scent)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/59 "2012-01-04T13:39:42Z")
I wore one in Edinburgh during Hogmenay (New Year’s). All the cabs and busses stopped running or wouldn’t pick us up after midnight so my group walked a few miles through icy slush and rain back to our hotel. I was perfectly warm, even in my cheap leather dress shoes. The wool socks and kilt really did the trick. Made a believer out of me. Got asked by a girl if I was a true Scotsman under my kilt. “I am tonight” I answered. She then asked me to give her a snog, but I thought she meant a piece of gum and told her I didn’t have any :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2012, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287/60 "2012-01-04T13:45:49Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Sure, I have and I would again. Then again, I spend a lot of summer wearing a kikoi (sarong), so it’s no big stretch. > > Also, I have zero respect for the made-up rules about clan tartans. I’d wear any tartan that caught my eye. There’s a Sikh tartan! [Lord Bassington-Bassington](http://lordbassingtonbassington.blogspot.com/2011/09/tartan-tuesday-now-with-turbans.html) is a Sikh who became a Scottish laird & commissioned a tartan. The fellows in the upper picture are wearing their tartans as sashes. But these [Scottish Sikhs](http://www.bhatra.co.uk/manage/html/gallery.php) wear kilts. I understand the modern “rules” about tartans are more commercial than ye olde ancient traditions but certain combinations might offend some people; some people just _love_ being offended. ([Design your own](http://www.tartanweb.org/designer/designer.php)!) The [House of Tartans](http://houseoftartan.co.uk/) also has a designer, plus a lookup feature. The Irish tartans were designed for tourists & go by county. I’ve seen Irish pipe bands wearing plain, saffron-colored kilts. Not every kilt is in a tartan pattern; and tartans may be worn in other ways than kilts. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/would-you-wear-a-kilt-if-you-were-not-scottish/608287.md?page=4)