# Wouldn't an actual zombie apocalypse be super-easy to defeat? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 18, 2020, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359 "2020-12-18T19:52:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2020, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/81 "2020-12-22T19:36:23Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > The thing is, whenever they would develop some efficient zombie elimination strategy in TWD they would immediately forget it a few episodes later. And zombie elimination strategies isn’t the only thing they forget from one season to the next. Six years ago, in the current TWD timeline, they found out how to manufacture bullets and to run vehicles on distilled alcohol. Yet now they are short of ammo and are still using horses. Basically they seem to be backsliding in technology rather than developing it further. At this point, they should be able to put at least micro-light planes in the air for surveillance and mow down the largest zombie hordes with automatic weapons. ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2020, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/82 "2020-12-24T20:28:42Z")
What’s a tortoise? ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2020, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/83 "2020-12-24T20:36:10Z")
> [@Acierocolotl](#): > > How long can a person survive without food or water? Days without water, a month without food, broadly speaking. Why should a zombie be different? Muscles take energy to move, all that moanin’ and shufflin’ takes energy to do. There’s no such thing as an energy-free shambling. Even if a zombie was ten times more effective at metabolising their energy reserves (metabolism really isn’t very efficient, frankly), they’d all run out of power within a year’s time. Maybe this is cheating, but I always assumed that their energy came partly from breaking down their own body tissues, as happens during starvation, and also in eating things we don’t see on camera. Sure, they WANT brains, but why couldn’t they live off dead zombie parts, or dead human parts, or for that matter Nutella or beef jerky? I also assume that most of these zombies just go into hibernation mode when there’s nothing to moan at and nothing to pursue. That’s gotta help economize some calories. ---
**Author:** ![Dinoguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9de0a6/32.png) [@Dinoguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinoguy)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2020, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/84 "2020-12-24T20:44:20Z")
Hey, just herd the zombies into Washington D.C. with no brains to eat they’ll just wither away… Hehehe ---
**Author:** ![Acierocolotl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acierocolotl/32/6241_2.png) [@Acierocolotl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acierocolotl)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2020, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/85 "2020-12-24T22:16:52Z")
> [@HMS\_Irruncible](#): > > Sure, they WANT brains, but why couldn’t they live off dead zombie parts, or dead human parts, or for that matter Nutella or beef jerky? My original scenario was based around zombies having really ridiculously efficient metabolism and basically, ah, unliving off a starvation diet. (Are they unlivers? Is that even accurate? I need a good, accurate term for my thaumatology.) They do have to move around off-camera, or you’d never get any meaningful siege scenario, and you can’t have zombies without a proper siege. Zombie hiberation… estivation… uhh, zombieation I guess has got legs on it though. At this point, the virus is carrying so much information I’m expecting it’d be the size of a tennis ball. Ultimately, though, if you’re willing to give the zombies a supernatural genesis, then you’re free to do as you please! They could all be breatharians looking for a bit of headcheese to liven up the world’s most boring diet. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2020, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/86 "2020-12-24T22:21:16Z")
> [@Acierocolotl](#): > > My original scenario was based around zombies having really ridiculously efficient metabolism and basically, ah, unliving off a starvation diet. (Are they unlivers? Is that even accurate? I need a good, accurate term for my thaumatology.) Just refer to them as “continuing to animate” and avoid any philosophical implications about the definition of living. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2020, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/87 "2020-12-24T22:29:00Z")
> [@Acierocolotl](#): > > (Are they unlivers? Is that even accurate? I need a good, accurate term for my thaumatology.) Unlivers? [I think those are the guys who make Ben & Jerry’s](https://www.unilever.com/brands/foods-and-refreshment/) ice cream, maybe that’s where they get their calories. It’s not a healthy diet, could explain the rotting flesh. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2020, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/88 "2020-12-25T01:12:01Z")
> [@snfaulkner](#): > > What’s a tortoise? The line is [“Tortoise? What’s that?”](https://youtu.be/Umc9ezAyJv0?t=90) ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2020, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/89 "2020-12-25T01:33:59Z")
Bah! That’ll teach me to drink n quote. ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2020, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/90 "2020-12-25T04:28:45Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > Just refer to them as “continuing to animate” and avoid any philosophical implications about the definition of living. Also a good idea to avoid even trying to explain what’s causing it; Romero figured that out after the first movie. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Librarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_librarian/32/402_2.png) [@The\_Librarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Librarian)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2020, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359/91 "2020-12-25T12:20:29Z")
What I learned from watching too many documentaries on this subject: - lock your bedroom - insist everybody in your group do the same - if somebody in your group doesn’t come out of their bedroom on their own: assume the worst. - compartiment groups of people in reasonably small groups, assume every other group is infected and require a long quarantine before mingling. - make sure your location will withstand large groups of zombies - forget about cars, never mind motorcycles. use heavy off-road vehicles preferably a bulldozer/tank/loader. Something that can dig large ditches. - residential areas should be avoided: construction of houses is too light. - make sure your primary defense (wall/ditch) cannot be breached by a single disgruntled (former) member of your group. - have a secondary and tertiary line of defense. - prepared a fall back position and the means to get there. In short: have a large group and compartiment rigorously. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wouldnt-an-actual-zombie-apocalypse-be-super-easy-to-defeat/928359.md?page=4)