# Wow. The Onion tasted bad. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 24, 2006, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463 "2006-01-24T22:51:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2006, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/61 "2006-01-25T18:40:14Z")
> [@pizzabrat](#): > > :rolleyes: But it wasn’t. > > Look, I’ll bite (since you baited twice). If there’s one thing I’m jinjoistic about it’s American humor (but there are other things 😉 ). British humor is at an almost parallel close second, but the rest of the world’s got some developments to be made in the comedy department, IMHO. Are there some concrete examples of Israeli humor online that you can link to so that we can judge for ourselves? Sure. Unfortunately it’s all in Hebrew… the funniest show on air here right now is called “_Miskhak Makhur_”, or, roughly, “Fixed Game”; you can see parts of it [here](http://mahur.walla.co.il/). Now **they** are sick 😃 There are others. Also satirical pages in all the major newspapers; sometimes they get downright vicious 🙂 An old joke (claimed as a true story, but I say UL) that works in English, just to give you a taste, started making the rounds about a week after Rabin was murdered… it tells about a bank, with people waiting in line. One of the cashiers finished a transaction and called out “who’s next?” and a guy from around the end of the line (suposedly) piped up – “Peres…” ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2006, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/62 "2006-01-25T18:49:39Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > But there was one “editorial” piece maybe a year ago that just utterly turned my stomach and pretty much turned me off the Onion. It was the one about a policemen “comforting” the parents of a murdered girl, and everything he says makes it clear that she went though the most horrifying sexual tortures. That’s one I really wish I could scrub out of my brain. Thanks a ton for reminding me. I was amused by the Quadragon and most of the stuff in this thread, but _that_ piece was too much by far. That was a long article that just got sicker and sicker as it went on. ---
**Author:** ![moonstarssun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9bd4f/32.png) [@moonstarssun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moonstarssun)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2006, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/63 "2006-01-25T19:27:33Z")
I love The Onion! My favorite non-article headline is “Georgia Adds Swastika, Middle Finger to Flag.” ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2006, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/64 "2006-01-25T22:18:53Z")
> [@Revenant Threshold](#): > > No one’s mentioned [Stephen Hawking Builds Robotic Exoskeleton](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39133) yet? That’s a great one, as is [I Hope My Baby Doesn’t Come Out All Fucked-Up And Shit](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33652) and while it’s really more poignant than offensive, [American Life Turns Into A Bad Jerry Bruckheimer Movie](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28144). Really, if slightly sick black humor isn’t for you, The Onion isn’t your bag. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![Brainiac4](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brainiac4/32/3534_2.png) [@Brainiac4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac4)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/65 "2006-01-26T03:49:05Z")
My favorite throwaway headline is, I think, [“New 10-10-911 saves emergency victims up to 30%”](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/35606). Subtle, yet not understated. 😃 The Gates article is genius (and I have to admit to sharing **Xploder** ’s shame at getting all the jokes). The best Onion article I have read recently is the one on [“Metal Hand Sign” abuse.](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/42365) The writers totally nailed that one. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/66 "2006-01-26T04:13:46Z")
I will admit to being whooshed by the “Quadragon”. I’m sure I’m missing something really obvious, but would someone explain? :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Brainiac4](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brainiac4/32/3534_2.png) [@Brainiac4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac4)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/67 "2006-01-26T04:28:21Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > I will admit to being whooshed by the “Quadragon”. I’m sure I’m missing something really obvious, but would someone explain? :smack: If you remove one side from the Pentagon (say, perhaps, because someone landed a plane in it as part of a terrorist attack), you’d get a Quadragon. ---
**Author:** ![TJdude825](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@TJdude825](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TJdude825)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/68 "2006-01-26T04:30:19Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > I will admit to being whooshed by the “Quadragon”. I’m sure I’m missing something really obvious, but would someone explain? :smack: Penta- means “five” and a pentagon (such as “the” Pentagon) has five sides. One of those five sides was pretty much destroyed by one of the four hijacked planes, thus it became a four-sided shape. And quad- means “four.” ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/69 "2006-01-26T04:31:19Z")
> [@Brainiac4](#): > > The best Onion article I have read recently is the one on [“Metal Hand Sign” abuse.](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/42365) The writers totally nailed that one. Except for putting the metal capital in Iceland instead of Norway. But that’s it. ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/70 "2006-01-26T04:42:17Z")
On the death of Ronald Reagan: **Nancy Reagan available** ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/71 "2006-01-26T04:59:21Z")
You must all be a bunch of [“Philistine Nazi Neanderthals”](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30990) for not recognizing the single most amazing and utterly spectacular Onion article ever writtenL [Amazing New Hyperbolic Chamber Greatest Invention In The History Of Mankind Ever](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30990). Seriously, this thing is the absolute pinnacle of Onion humor, bar none; no other article could ever dream of coming even close to its sheer staggering level of balls to the wall hilarity, not in a million billion years. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/72 "2006-01-26T05:10:09Z")
> [@Biffy the Elephant Shrew](#): > > But there was one “editorial” piece maybe a year ago that just utterly turned my stomach and pretty much turned me off the Onion. It was the one about a policemen “comforting” the parents of a murdered girl, and everything he says makes it clear that she went though the most horrifying sexual tortures. That’s one I really wish I could scrub out of my brain. Having read the above, and my curiosity being piqued, I took considerable effort to find the referenced article through _The Onion’s_ search engine. And having read it, my reaction was rather different from yours. I was favorably and pleasantly impressed at how the author managed the truly amazing feat of taking the theme of torture-murder and turning it into something genuinely, if elaborately, funny. But that’s just how my mind works, and it need not be your problem. Until I figure out where you live. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/73 "2006-01-26T05:12:07Z")
> [@jackelope](#): > > On the death of Ronald Reagan: > > **Nancy Reagan available** That, on the other hand, is distasteful and horrifying even to me. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Sleel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/73ab20/32.png) [@Sleel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleel)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/74 "2006-01-26T07:19:05Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > That’s a great one, as is [I Hope My Baby Doesn’t Come Out All Fucked-Up And Shit](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33652) Jeez, that sounds just like a friend my sister had in high school. The only joke about it is that something like that wouldn’t be printed in a newspaper, otherwise it’s completely true to life. Scary. > [@BrainGlutton](#): > > Having read the above, and my curiosity being piqued, I took considerable effort to find the referenced article through The Onion’s search engine. Link, please? ---
**Author:** ![Banquet\_Bear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/banquet_bear/32/373_2.png) [@Banquet\_Bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banquet_Bear)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/75 "2006-01-26T07:45:19Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > [American Life Turns Into A Bad Jerry Bruckheimer Movie](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28144). > Stranger > [@](#): > > The collective sense of outrage, helplessness, and desperation felt by Americans is beyond comprehension. And it will be years before the full ramifications of the events of Sept. 11 become clear. But one thing is clear: No Austrian bodybuilder, gripping Uzis and striding shirtless through the debris, will save us and make it all better. Shocked and speechless, we are all still waiting for the end credits to roll. They aren’t going to. …the best satire often makes us look in the mirror, and _the Onion_ has it in spades… ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/76 "2006-01-26T08:17:49Z")
> [@Brainiac4](#): > > If you remove one side from the Pentagon (say, perhaps, because someone landed a plane in it as part of a terrorist attack), you’d get a Quadragon. Oh, snap! :smack: TBS: Very Funny. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 9:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/77 "2006-01-26T09:34:15Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > Yeah, but didn’t they run it under a picture of Siskel? 🙂 I think it was just a sidebar headline on its own, with no picture. It was the moment of 😕…:eek: that made it so perfect. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/78 "2006-01-26T14:32:19Z")
> [@Sleel](#): > > Link, please? [http://www.theonion.com/content/node/34104](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/34104) ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/79 "2006-01-26T16:22:52Z")
Well since this thread has veered into poll territory I’ll put these headlines up for grabs, I guess I just like clever word games: “Jurisprudence Fetishist Gets Off on Technicality” “Pederast Judge Tries 12-Year Old as Adult” “Sub-Orbital Ballistic Propulsion Engineer Not Exactly a Rocket Scientist” and recently “Philandering String Theorist Can Explain Everything” That last linked to an ‘in-brief’ article but shouldn’t have. They do often write brilliant headlines with pointless articles attached. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2006, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463/80 "2006-01-26T18:15:24Z")
Personally, [I want robots to stop fingering my wife.](http://www.theonion.com/2056-06-22/opinion/1/) There oughta be a law… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wow-the-onion-tasted-bad/341463.md?page=5)