# Write your Movie-A-Minute Summarization here **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 8, 2003, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672 "2003-02-08T06:26:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Tristan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tristan/32/18058_2.png) [@Tristan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tristan)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2003, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/61 "2003-02-21T11:18:22Z")
**Quills** Society- porn is bad deSade- porn is good Priest- porn is bad, I want you naked deSade- porn is good. I’ve written with my own feces. priest, seeing laundry maiden- maybe porn isn’t so bad… audience- what the hell? ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2003, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/62 "2003-02-21T17:14:48Z")
American History X Derek: I’m a white supremacist skinhead! Goes to jail, pisses off other white supremacist skinheads. Is raped in the shower. Only black people are nice to him. Derek: Damn! White people suck worse than black people. I’m a changed man. Danny: Too late for me, though. Moonstruck Loretta: I have no luck. I will marry a fat, boring guy Ronny: You love the wolf in me, that don’t make you no lamb. _passionate sex_ Loretta: Snap out of it! _opera, more sex_ Rose: Your life is in the toilet! Everyone agrees. Illicit affairs are terminated, proposals are withdrawn, offered, and accepted. Grandpa: I’m so confused! _laughter_ ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2003, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/63 "2003-02-22T17:13:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DrClayForrester \* > **Holden: I’m the artist. You’re a tracer.** Hey! ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2003, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/64 "2003-02-22T17:19:29Z")
Evil Dead: Four idiot college kids drive to a rundown, deserted, evil-looking cabin in the middle of nowhere with only one way out, screw around with a book of the dead, and have the nerve to look surprised when bad things happen. THE END Evil Dead 2: Some people just don’t learn. THE END Army of Darkness: Everyone: Ash is the enemy! Kill him! Wise Man: But he might be able to help us fight the deadites. Soldiers: Well, why didn’t you say so? Ash, don’t screw up. (Ash screws up) Everyone: You’re worthless! We’re out of here. Ash: But I’ll help you fight the deadites. Everyone: Well, why didn’t you say so? Don’t screw up. (Ash screws up) (The good guys win anyway, because deadites don’t have the strategic sense God gave cabbage.) Ash (talking with coworker): So they said that getting back to the present would be safe, as long as I didn’t screw up. (Everything goes dark and windy. Ash fires about 300 shots in a crowded department store and somehow only kills one possessed customer.) Everyone: You saved us from your screwup! Our hero. Ash: I rule! THE END ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2003, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/65 "2003-02-22T18:23:50Z")
And my **second** favorite trilogy … The Godfather: Vito: I’m bad. Sonny: I’m bad. Fredo: I’m a moron. Michael: I’m good. (Vito gets shot) Michael: OK, fine, I’m bad. (kills people) Michael: I’m married. (Boom) Or not … Vito: I’m sorry I got you into this. (dies) Michael: Whatever, Pop. (kills everyone who even looked at his family wrong) Kate: I love you, Michael, but you’re bad. Michael: But I can be good. Kate: Works for me! (marries Michael) THE END Godfather II: (lots of shooting) Kate: Why us? Michael: Well, I’m in the mob, you know. Kate: But I thought you were going to be good. Michael: That’s probably because you’re a moron. (Michael leaves and makes really complicated deals and orders people killed.) Kate: I want a divorce. Oh, by the way, I aborted your son. Audience: Jesus, you really ARE a moron!! (Michael orders more people killed and then sits around the house wondering what Frank Sinatra would do.) Godfather III: (Michael goes to a wedding and meets Sonny’s kid … and there’s this helicopter … OK, maybe I tuned out a little.) ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2003, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/66 "2003-02-22T18:29:50Z")
Bonny and Clyde: Bonny and Clyde: Robbing banks is fun, if you don’t take it too seriously! Audience: Ha-ha, you’re _right_! Old man: These two sociopaths have robbed, kidnapped and killed cops and civilians! They also ruined the life of my only son. I’m going to cooperate with law enforcement to get them off the streets! Audience: Wahhhh!! You sadistic _bastard_!! Junior: Ahnold: Hey, gang, I play a pregnant guy who doesn’t kill _one_ non-caucasian! Watch the fun. Ahnold’s fans: Get real. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2003, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/67 "2003-02-22T18:40:45Z")
Bladerunner: Deckert: I kill replicants. Maybe I am a replicant? I’m in love with a replicant. More human than human? Whatever. Get me the hell out of this depressing, rainy city. ---
**Author:** ![RawkStah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/46a35a/32.png) [@RawkStah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RawkStah)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2003, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672/68 "2003-02-23T02:23:59Z")
NEON GENESIS EVANGELION (Some KIDS are RECRUITED to pilot GIANT ROBOTS to FIGHT MONSTERS. The KIDS have NERVOUS BREAKDOWNS. Then GOD shows up. Then, ALL OF A SUDDEN, everything turns into a DAVID LYNCH MOVIE.) Audience: WTF? THE END [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-movie-a-minute-summarization-here/153672.md?page=3)