# Write your own epitaph. Silly versions only, please. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 16, 2011, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859 "2011-08-16T02:25:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/21 "2011-08-16T05:53:15Z")
\*\*Here lies EvilTOJ Please; No Spitting No Dancing No Urinating \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/22 "2011-08-16T06:28:35Z")
Oak left here (insert date). Will you still remember him? ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/23 "2011-08-16T06:31:12Z")
Beneath this sod lies another (another oldie). I wonder what **PoorYorick** will post in the thread? ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/24 "2011-08-16T06:33:14Z")
Needscoffee ---
**Author:** ![Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/25 "2011-08-16T06:57:35Z")
**Who Farted?** ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/26 "2011-08-16T07:51:35Z")
**cmyk** born February 1973 Died \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ **You’re Next.** ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/27 "2011-08-16T08:08:03Z")
Or… \*\*cmyk Episode IV A NEW HOPE\*\* It is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire. During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire’s ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR, an armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet. Pursued by the Empire’s sinister agents, Princess Leia races home aboard her starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save her people and restore freedom to the galaxy… ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/28 "2011-08-16T09:27:58Z")
Hades now runs SAP. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/29 "2011-08-16T10:26:35Z")
I’m either in heaven playing a harp, or in Hell shaking hands with all my friends. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/30 "2011-08-16T10:33:09Z")
\*\*FairyChatMom \*\*I’m nice, dammit! ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/31 "2011-08-16T10:35:08Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > \*\*FairyChatMom > \*\*I’m nice, dammit! Don’t you mean I was nice, dammit! ? ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/32 "2011-08-16T10:36:37Z")
Are you suggesting I won’t be nice in the afterlife? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Alka\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Alka\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alka_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/33 "2011-08-16T11:54:20Z")
“Lots of Indians down here, property developers beware.” ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/34 "2011-08-16T12:04:45Z")
“Generalissimo Franco and Bob are both still dead.” [if I die somewhere beyond 80 years of age] “Only the good die young.” ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/35 "2011-08-16T12:38:52Z")
Farewell to Moonlitherial. She said “Over my dead body” to the wrong person. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/36 "2011-08-16T12:44:33Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > [if I die somewhere beyond 80 years of age] > > “Only the good die young.” In Spanish we say that “weeds never die”. Apparently I wasn’t the only one in my family whose response to “Grandpa is dead” was “well shit, I guess weeds DO die after all!” Apparently “Weeds do die after all” is not an appropriate epitaph. ---
**Author:** ![Satchmo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/satchmo/32/4223_2.png) [@Satchmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satchmo)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/37 "2011-08-16T12:52:18Z")
Here lies Satchmo “You should see the other guy!” ---
**Author:** ![chowching](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f14d63/32.png) [@chowching](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowching)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/38 "2011-08-16T13:15:51Z")
_Here lies Chowching’s bones._ - His brain is on a museum.\* - His heart is on an old man.\* _His liver is on his uncle._ - His kidneys are on a science lab.\* _His eyes are on a 15 year old girl._ \*His blood is on a blood bank. \*_His skin was used to bind a book._ _His sperm is still available._ _What are you waiting for?_ _PS If you want the bones. Don’t hesitate to contact your local grave keeper._ ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/39 "2011-08-16T13:49:39Z")
“Zigged instead of zagged.” ---
**Author:** ![Ca3799](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9f8e36/32.png) [@Ca3799](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ca3799)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2011, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/40 "2011-08-16T14:11:43Z")
I’d like … “I came, I saw, I laughed” …but in Latin. Anyone know how it is written? ``` Veni, Vedi, ....? ``` [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859.md?page=3)