# Write your own epitaph. Silly versions only, please. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 16, 2011, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859 "2011-08-16T02:25:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/61 "2011-08-17T02:00:05Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > Shouldn’t that be “You’re the 1,000,000th visitor!!!”? 😃 Ha, I was thinking about it… but there’s something about pure yellow on white that makes my corneas peel back! Maybe I need to change my user name to **rgb?** ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/62 "2011-08-17T02:43:16Z")
Remember me as you pass by; As you are now, so once was I. As I am now, so you will be. Prepare for death and follow me. This is an actual epitaph from around 1860, in the cemetery where my parents are buried. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/63 "2011-08-17T12:52:07Z")
Did I kill an epitaph thread??? ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/64 "2011-08-17T13:24:06Z")
I could have had one of my kids post this, they both know what I want: > [@](#): > > I did not take those Flintstones vitamins, and I did not quit my job because Deana told me to. That ought to settle it. ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/65 "2011-08-17T14:16:26Z")
In reality, mine will be engraved with a “Get out of Hell free” card (as seen from here: [http://www.getoutofhellfree.com/](http://www.getoutofhellfree.com/)). ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/66 "2011-08-17T14:19:30Z")
> [@kayT](#): > > Remember me as you pass by; > As you are now, so once was I. > As I am now, so you will be. > Prepare for death and follow me. > > This is an actual epitaph from around 1860, in the cemetery where my parents are buried. ::slaps **kayT** with wet trout :: I said _silly versions only, please_. What are you, some kind of Etruscan? > [@kayT](#): > > Did I kill an epitaph thread??? No, but you made Baby Jesus cry with your seriousness/inability to follow instructions to wisecrack. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/67 "2011-08-17T14:21:33Z")
Here Lies Burried Count Blucher “…and there was much rejoicing.” ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/68 "2011-08-17T14:39:34Z")
> [@Ca3799](#): > > I’d like .. > “I came, > I saw, > I laughed” > ..but in Latin. Anyone know how it is written? > > ``` > Veni, > Vedi, > ....? > > ``` Veni, Vidi, Risi ---
**Author:** ![BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/69 "2011-08-17T15:54:10Z")
…he only occasionally farted inappropriately. ---
**Author:** ![Indian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@Indian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indian)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/70 "2011-08-17T16:15:46Z")
Indian, wanted to cut a flash in this world of trouble. Flash cut him instead,here he lies in rubble. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/71 "2011-08-17T17:07:09Z")
> [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](#): > > …he only occasionally farted inappropriately. If I can arrange to be buried one plot over from you, mine would read… _ **…occasionally?!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/72 "2011-08-17T17:50:19Z")
“Here lies Train, someone forgot to switch the track.” 1987 - 2646 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/73 "2011-08-17T20:19:34Z")
ouch! ouch! trouts is rough! Sorry, sorry. Etruscan? ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/74 "2011-08-17T20:52:17Z")
Here Lies G0sp3l ``` Inconceivable It didn't mean what he thought It did, Went against a Sicilian when death was on the line. ``` ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/75 "2011-08-17T21:09:04Z")
Here lies **Marley23**. Will be back soon for revenge on the rest of you. _or_ Here lies **Marley23**. Since I’m gone, the rest of you may as well kill yourselves now. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/76 "2011-08-17T22:01:40Z")
Since I’m such a fan: \*\*HERE LIES cmyk DIED September 7, 1885 _Shot in the back by Mad Dog Tannen over a matter of 80 dollars In loving memory of his beloved Clara_\*\* ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/77 "2011-08-17T22:19:59Z")
Here lies Inigo Montoya, hunted down by Count Rugen’s son. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/78 "2011-08-17T22:39:15Z")
Cartooniverse Entered the world with cough and wheez, departed same on a gentle breeze. ---
**Author:** ![Bumbershoot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbershoot/32/3428_2.png) [@Bumbershoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbershoot)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/79 "2011-08-17T23:12:43Z")
Here lies Bumbershoot ``` And over there, and over there We *told* him skydiving was dangerous ``` ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2011, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859/80 "2011-08-18T00:54:29Z")
Here lies Gary he made some people laugh. But he never should have tried to out-kick that giraffe. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/write-your-own-epitaph-silly-versions-only-please/592859.md?page=5)