# WTF? Ex-boyfriend inventory on a Saturday morning? (TMI warning) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 8, 2002, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028 "2002-06-08T23:09:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Hamish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a5b964/32.png) [@Hamish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamish)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/141 "2002-06-11T19:13:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by musicguy \* > \*\*Perhaps if I was that way, I could find a way to relate to all of this spewed venom and somehow justify it in my own mind due to my past experiences. Being that I don’t choose to live my life that way though, I’ll continue to appreciate when someone expresses concern for me. \*\* Um, I choose not to live my life that way, either, but I’d still defend **scottevil** on this. It’s not about defensiveness. It’s about one group of people imposing their values on someone else. A few years back, I was infected with a nasty skin disease I’d never previously heard of. I went to the doctor recommended by my university’s health service. After looking over my skin, he concluded that I’d caught it through sexual contact, and that the reason it had spread so readily is that I was immuno-suppressed due to AIDS. He told me this, and told me to get tested for HIV. I was in shock. I had lived with my partner in a monogamous relationship for a year. I had never had an affair, and he (my partner) didn’t have the skin disease. I’d tested negative last time for HIV. I went to a doctor I’d seen previously, who was gay, and he informed me this skin disease could be picked up rather easily – in swimming pools, from toilet seats, etc. When I got tested for HIV, I came up negative. Again. I’m sure the first doctor – the one who threw me into panic and confusion – felt he was “showing concern” for me as well. But he assumed that, as a gay man, any disease I might have was an STD and aggravated by AIDS. There are some forms of “showing concern” that are, frankly, insulting. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/142 "2002-06-11T19:34:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Hamish \* > \*\* > There are some forms of “showing concern” that are, frankly, insulting. \*\* A-FUCKING-MEN! Preach it, brother!!! ---
**Author:** ![OxyMoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9a140/32.png) [@OxyMoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OxyMoron)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/143 "2002-06-11T20:56:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > \*\*And now I shall remain steadfastly silent about the new man in my life. Thank you, **scott** , for throwing yourself on your sword [snip] \*\* I thought **scott** was throwing himself on someone _else’s_ sword…\ ---
**Author:** ![musicguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@musicguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/musicguy)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/144 "2002-06-11T20:59:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by gobear \* > \*\* > 'Scuse me? Learn to read, pal. I didn’t say all gay men tricked. > Idiot. \*\* No? Here is what you said: > [@](#): > > So Scott Evil went home with a trick last night? So what? What gay man hasn’t done that? I haven’t ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/145 "2002-06-11T21:06:13Z")
And I never said anything about safe sex. (Which, btw, the only truely safe sex is masturbation-as long as you wash your hands after playing with that dead woodchuck.) No, what I said was that I was concerned because **scott** was going home with strangers. That’s all. I still think that, but hey-you say you know what you’re doing. I think it’s dangerous-but, well, I just worry about people. That’s all. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/146 "2002-06-11T21:17:15Z")
**Guin** , we all realize you’re being sincere. You’re not really the person we’re snapping at. It’s just that when every time you utter the word “sex” and the next word out of someone else’s mouth is “AIDS” - well, it gets mighty tiresome, and you get kind of snappish. Of course you’re concerned about **scott** , be it going home with strangers or contracting an STD, and for that thought, we thank you. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/147 "2002-06-11T21:25:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*And I never said anything about safe sex. (Which, btw, the only truely safe sex is masturbation-as long as you wash your hands after playing with that dead woodchuck.) > > No, what I said was that I was concerned because **scott** was going home with strangers. That’s all. > > I still think that, but hey-you say you know what you’re doing. I think it’s dangerous-but, well, I just worry about people. That’s all. \*\* Guin: Though I have been considered at times to be the touchiest of the SDMB Gay Mafia, I think what you’ve said comes from concern and consideration. I saw no judgement in what you said. Te absolvo. _hug_ ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/148 "2002-06-11T21:53:04Z")
Aw, thanks guys. 😉 _hugs back atchya_ Now get back into that theeayter, Son of Nel! I’m sending you “Space Travelers”…a little romp with Gene Hackman and Gregory Peck! Eat it! ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/149 "2002-06-11T22:16:43Z")
**Musicguy** , so are you saying that, in you entire life, you’ve never, ever had a causal liaison? Wow. Shouldn’t you be in a museum? ---
**Author:** ![CnoteChris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/278dde/32.png) [@CnoteChris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CnoteChris)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/150 "2002-06-11T22:27:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > **Guin… It’s just that when every time you utter the word “sex” and the next word out of someone else’s mouth is “AIDS” - well, it gets mighty tiresome, and you get kind of snappish.** The problem with that, **Esprix** , is that the first person to even mention gay or HIV was Scott himself. It wasn’t one of us, or even the person who said, ‘Hey, hope you’re careful’. And that, when it all boils down to it, is the thing that’s bugging me about all this- Scott himself admits he was less that forthright in revealing the gay angle in the initial post. So much so, in my opinion, that it took me a bit to ‘get’ that he was gay. If it took me a bit, it’s possible it took others a bit too, up to and including, **PunditLisa** (I honestly don’t know if she knew or not, but the point is, it wasn’t clear in the OP, _or_ the subsequent posts until you guys started getting all worked up over the ‘Be careful’ comment). It’s possible she really didn’t know, or mean it the way you interpreted it. When I read the comments by Pundit, I took it as the stand-by, ‘Ya better be careful, doing that thing you do’. I’ve heard it any number of times, and from people who certainly didn’t mean it as an attack against my sexuality. Quite the contrary, actually, it was a gender/ sexuality neutral thing to say, from one concerned person to another. You flip a lid over that? Apparently, because immediately, **Matt** , **Scott** , and a couple of others, took serious exception to the ‘Hope you’re careful’ comment. And in that comment, or diatribe, shit starts coming out about it only being said because the OP’er was gay; that straight “breeders” don’t know shit about the topic anyway, and even if they did, they should shut the fuck up anyway, on top of made up shit that the comment meant the OP’er was somehow a walking bacteria farm. Give me a fucking break. You guys read all sorts of shit into that comment and started attacking anyone who supported saying it. And after that, after it was beaten to a pulp, you start talking of how ignorant, foolish, and otherwise clueless we are because we said all these prejudiced things. No. Nada. Not the way it happened. **You** (Or more precisely, the others) said all kinds of shit that wasn’t said and turned it around so much that you started attributing those comments to either **Lisa** , **Guin** , or others. Shit, you brought it all up, not them. You created the shit-storm, the controversy, the hostility. Shit, when I even tried to explain my side, or why I said what I said, I was told it was ‘people like you who perpetuate the ignorance on this topic’. Once again, whatever. Finally, you say you jumped the gun and started attacking because this trend has happened over and over again. Well let me tell you, it’d be nice to fucking know that fact long before were in the middle of page fucking three of the thread. A lot of this could have been avoided if you hadn’t assumed it was the attack you thought it was. Even now, I don’t think it was. Go back a re-read it. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/151 "2002-06-11T22:27:51Z")
actually **gobear** if I read the post correctly, he seems to be answering your charge “show me where I said all gay men tricked”, then quoted you saying “so this guy tricked, what gay man hasn’t?” Perhaps you didn’t mean ‘all gay men trick’ when you said "what gay man hasn’t’, but it does seem to fit that bill. ---
**Author:** ![CnoteChris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/278dde/32.png) [@CnoteChris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CnoteChris)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/152 "2002-06-11T22:34:56Z")
Umm, please realize that the ‘you’ above isn’t necessarily meant towards _you_, personally, **Esprix**. It’s meant towards those that started getting all worked up and arguing the meaning of ‘Be careful’. Thought I should add that tidbit. ---
**Author:** ![musicguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@musicguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/musicguy)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/153 "2002-06-11T22:51:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by gobear \* > \*\ ***Musicguy** , so are you saying that, in you entire life, you’ve never, ever had a causal liaison? > > Wow. > > Shouldn’t you be in a museum? \*\* Perhaps, sometimes I feel old enough to be 🙂 Look, I have nothing against you or any other gay person on this board. All I was trying to imply was that gay people are not all promiscuous. I’m not judging those who are, I’m just not. Its the choice I have made. When you stated that “What gay man hasn’t tricked?”, you were implying that they all do. I haven’t. Should I really be throw in a museum for that? Is it that unheard of that every person that I have has sex with is someone that I knew for quite a while and cared about? Should I be put down for that? It is but another example of life’s little ironies. Spend most of my life feeling like I am an outcast because I am gay then be made to feel like an outcast among gay people. Regardless, I am going to live my life the way that I want to. Sorry for the hijack ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/154 "2002-06-11T22:51:14Z")
As I said, **CNote** , when it happens over and over and over and over, you get snappish, sometimes to the point of irrationality. I didn’t say it was either right or justified - just human. How about giving us the benefit of the doubt, here? Esprix ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/155 "2002-06-11T22:51:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CnoteChris \* > \*\*Scott himself admits he was less that forthright in revealing the gay angle in the initial post. So much so, in my opinion, that it took me a bit to ‘get’ that he was gay. If it took me a bit, it’s possible it took others a bit too, up to and including, **PunditLisa** (I honestly don’t know if she knew or not, but the point is, it wasn’t clear in the OP, _or_ the subsequent posts until you guys started getting all worked up over the ‘Be careful’ comment). It’s possible she really didn’t know, or mean it the way you interpreted it. > \*\* Let me jump back into this train wreck of a thread and make a few things clear, and ask a question: 1. When did I admit I was “less than forthright in revealing the gay angle in the initial post?” It’s been a few days now, and I don’t remember. After 100-something replies, I can’t be expected to remember everything that was posted or even everything I posted. 2. My user name is scott evil. Would you not assume I was male? Which leads me to… 3. Ex-boyfriend inventory on a Saturday morning. (Either mine or someone else’s, whatever.) Which leads me to… 4. I went home with this guy - in my OP. 5. You obviously don’t read my posts (many of which have absolutely nothing to do with my sexuality). Fair enough. But I made it clear from my very first post, introducing myself, that I was gay. I was posting about an unusual occurrence. I was neither bragging about having gotten some, nor did I get into detail about what we did in bed (well, on the couch), nor did I ask for safe-sex advice. This post may come across as slightly vitriolic, **CnoteChris** , but I don’t mean it that way at all. At this point, I’m far beyond that. Now I’ll just sit back and watch everyone duke it out some more. This is great. It’s cheaper than cable. 😉 - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/156 "2002-06-11T23:10:52Z")
OK, in order to lift this thread, I’ll present my own ex-boyfriend inventory. 😃 Ex-bf #1: We met when we were really young. He was too manipulative and jealous, at least at the time. He’s now my best friend. Ex-bf #2: Manipulative. Was still going out with a Harvard boy, so I was the mistress, I guess. :rolleyes: But he was hot. Ex-bf #3: We got along great, and for all intents and purposes, were living together, but I was too young for that kind of commitment, and he was a bit too dainty for my tastes. Ex-bf #4: Drunken club-kid. Ex-bf #5: He had feelings for me that I didn’t quite reciprocate. We’re still friends. He’s now with ex-bf #7 (I introduced them, and they now live together). Ex-bf #6: A bit too old for me. Had issues. Only came out at 34. I didn’t enjoy being therapist/mentor for a guy six years older than me. Ex-bf #7: Pothead. We had a lot of fun. I wasn’t working that summer, so we’d do nothing but smoke up, watch movies, and indulge our munchies. He had a problem with commitment. He’s still my friend, though. Ex-bf #8: Way too young for me. Had issues. Would disappear from my place in the middle of the night. Showed back up in my life a few months later. I still see him every now and again. Ex-bf #9: Great guy, incredibly intelligent, fun to be with, but didn’t believe in monogamy. I think that covers it. 😉 - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![CnoteChris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/278dde/32.png) [@CnoteChris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CnoteChris)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2002, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/157 "2002-06-11T23:41:03Z")
**Scott** - #1. The closest you came was this… **“So I post something about a weird occurence that may or may not have involved (cover your eyes) gay sex… \ Did I once mention sex in my OP? No. It may have been implied, but never mentioned.”** (Page 1) Now I can see where that might have meant _sex_, as in sexual intercourse, but at the time, _I_ took the comment to mean you tried to keep the sexuality of both parties out of it. If I was wrong, than I was wrong. In this thread, as with many others, I’m not looking first at who wrote the thing, nor am, or was, I tring to make a connection between whether you or he was gay or anything like that. I initially (Because it wasn’t obvious in the OP) thought this had to do with het sex. #2. Stranger things have happened around here. There’s been any number of times I’ve thought a poster was male, only to learn later on they were female, and vice versa. But I admit, it wasn’t until I went back and read your name and then re-read the post that it was clearer that this was about two guys, and not some other combination. The point is that from my perspective, the OP _itself_ wasn’t clear on what the details were. Combine that with number one, and I assumed this was done on purpose (Don’t ask me why I think, or thought, that way, it just is/was (Confusing enough for ya yet?)). Combine that with number three below, and it might make more sense. #3. The whole ‘chyck’ thing, guy thing, people taking shit, someone not saying something while you slept, and to be honest with you, I got confused pretty fast. Originally, I thought the ‘chyck’ was clearing shit out, not the other way around. Again, retention of the specific details did allude me for a bit, originally, but it wasn’t like you made it easy to understand (Sorry, but it’s true). Given that, heading into **PunditLisa’s** post I wasn’t a bit surprised to see what she had written, again, because it was gender/sexuality-wise nuetral. But even after I understood the details, her comment alone didn’t seem all that offensive to me, it seemed pretty sincere and nothing out of the ordinary for here, or the real world. #4. That’s the one thing I got right in the original post. #5. Good lord. You expect me to remember, or find, your very first post around here introducing yourself? That makes about as much sense as **Esprix** insinuating that I need to search your posts before I comment, just to make sure I’m up to speed and fully aware of any situation that led to this blow-up. Sorry, I haven’t done that for anyone else, and I’m not about to now, especially with the board running like shit. Had something triggered a previous thread, or someone would have mentioned your ongoing irritation with people telling you to be carefull early on, maybe this would have died out earlier (Kind of what I proposed earlier in my post above, page two). That I didn’t check your previous posts before posting, or went back to your very first post around here where you explained yourself, hardly is a means for you to tell me I’m way off base here, I doubt others do that. And I really wonder why any of that would have justified your going after **PunditLisa** the way you did, especially when the details, or her motivations for those comments, were far from clear. You read what you wanted to read into that line and acted accordingly. It’s how you acted that bothered me then, and quite frankly, bothers me now. Unless you **knew** she meant those comments gratuitously, or with malice, than I think you owe her an apology. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2002, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/158 "2002-06-12T00:22:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CnoteChris \* > \*\*You read what you wanted to read into that line and acted accordingly. It’s how you acted that bothered me then, and quite frankly, bothers me now. Unless you **knew** she meant those comments gratuitously, or with malice, than I think you owe her an apology. \*\* **Puh-leeeze.** Were you to have read and absorbed what the other gay dopers have said, you might get a clue on about the perception and WHY irritation was justly felt. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_fun_ball/32/17664_2.png) [@Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Fun_Ball)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2002, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/159 "2002-06-12T00:37:35Z")
This thread has been really bothering me for a couple of days now, so I feel I must add my two cents. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CnoteChris \* > If anyone deserves an apology, I think it’d be **Pundit Lisa**. I have to agree. Granted, **Lisa’s** post was rather patronizing, but no where did she imply (_at least in my opinion_) that gay = disease ridden or even mention AIDS. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by PunditLisa_ > Okay, let me get this straight. You meet a guy last night, go home with him and have sex. In the morning, a strange dude walks in and starts demanding his shit back. > > 1. I hope you practice safe sex. > > 2. Perhaps the “ex” didn’t realize he was the “ex” until he walked in on you two. > > 3. I think it’s a tad ironic that you, who admitted to going home with and having sex with a guy you just met, can criticize your friend for not changing his locks after a break up. You aren’t exactly a model of caution, Scott. Patronizing, maybe. Superior, sure. Presumptuous, definitely. Even so, I did not feel these responses were justified: > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Hastur_ > And you feel you can point fingers? > > Is this any of your business? > > Just because it isn’t something you would do does not give you carte blanche to cast aspersions. OK, could be valid (except by posting, scott was implying he wanted comment), but it quickly escalates: > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Hastur_ > AGAIN with the safe sex lecture from a clueless hetero! SoScott Evil went home with a trick last night? So what? What gay man hasn’t done that? Do you lecture hetero guys who have casual sex? If not, shut the fuck up. Yiiii! Pretty virulent, I would think twice about posting my opinion again! Followed by: > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by scott evil_ > > > [@](#): > > > > _Originally posted by PunditLisa_ > > 3) I think it’s a tad ironic that you, who admitted to going home with and having sex with a guy you just met, can criticize your friend for not changing his locks after a break up. You aren’t exactly a model of caution, Scott. > > There’s a bit of a difference that seems to escape your tiny little brain. And you aren’t exactly a model of Dear fucking Abby. > > Jesus fucking Christ, I post in the Pit to vent, not to get some fucking safe-sex lecture and criticism of my perceived morals. This is what, the third time this has happened? Fucking breeders need to pratcise safe sex too, not just us “disease-ridden” homos. > > I wasn’t posting about what I did in the sack with the guy. I was posting about the strange event that occurred the next morning. It’s obvious you filled in the blanks, there, and imagined some kind of depraved, immoral romp that was guaranteed to make me contract HIV. Get a grip. Hard core! Unnecessary! No where does **BreederLisa** mention “disease-ridden homos”. Maybe I’m sticking my nose in where it does not belong, but this is a pretty personal attack and I don’t feel **Lisa** was being enough of a Bitch to deserve this. Of course, now the pile on really starts to get going. We get this gem: > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by scott evil_ > Obviously you don’t realize how deeply this plague has affected our community. If anyone’s in the dark, it’s people like you. Lame! Sorry, but I’m a breeder and I’ve had two friends die from aids and several more that are hanging in there. This is bigotry. It’s an ugly generalization that pumped up the venom in this thread another notch. This really set me over the edge: > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Sue Duhnym_ > And finally, I’m sorry for even daring to interject anything at all into this thread for I obviously have no useful information or valid opinions about anything at all and even if I did they wouldn’t be appreciated because I’m straight. From now on I’ll just keep my big fucking mouth shut. Consider my lesson learned. ☹ This has to be about the saddest thing I’ve ever read on this board. This is from a doper who tried to help (inappropriatly?) by posting links to more information. Granted it was off target, stirred up the emotions again, but she thought she was trying to help for Christ’s sake. The straight dope is all about providing more information right? I know I’m rambling, but I’m pretty dissillusioned and saddened by the behavior of people who I have admired and respected. Oh, and as a side note: when I first saw the thread title and the OP’s name I though Scott was a female (no offence scott). I really thought the thread was going to be about an ex-boyfriend named scott by a woman with the tag scott (is) evil. ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2002, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028/160 "2002-06-12T00:42:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Diane \* > \*\*So Flamsterette\_X, are you telling CnoteChris what he can and can’t do? > > Just checking. > > :rolleyes: \*\* No, **Diane** , I most certainly am not. I’m just suggesting that he have a little consideration for others’ feelings. **Guin** , I’m 25 and single… so don’t worry. I can understand people possibly not knowing about **Scott** ’s sexuality, but for the reasons he himself has listed, it should have been fairly obvious. As for reading and absorbing what the gay Dopers are saying, and then attempting to understand where they’re coming from, I think that it would be a good idea for everyone. F\_X [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-ex-boyfriend-inventory-on-a-saturday-morning-tmi-warning/113028.md?page=9)