# WTF kind of person would do this to his girlfriend?? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 10, 2005, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324 "2005-02-10T01:53:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/121 "2005-02-10T15:04:37Z")
The only thing I find that was truly wrong is the mix of Vodka, which I assume is 80 proof, and powdered electrolyte, which I assume makes it 79 proof, and passing it off as wine, which may be 1/2 that proof. To boot letting her drink 4 glasses of it. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/122 "2005-02-10T15:06:19Z")
> [@missbunny](#): > > I haven’t read the whole thread yet. But I have two questions: Maybe you should read the thread. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/123 "2005-02-10T15:07:20Z")
She’s an adult right? And probably capable (I hope) of telling the difference in taste between vodka and table wine. It’s up to her to control her alcohol intake, not up to him to play baby sitter and tell her how much she’s allowed to have. ---
**Author:** ![missbunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/76d3ee/32.png) [@missbunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missbunny)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/124 "2005-02-10T15:14:07Z")
> [@](#): > > No, the entree isn’t the entire MRE. If you had read the original post, you would have noticed that the meal consisted of 9 entrees, 8 packets of noodles, \ Okay, now I have read the thread. So we are expected to believe that this one girl ate all that? Or even half that? That would be the same as her eating, say, four steaks and four plates of pasta, plus whatever other gunk he put in, at one meal? And not noticing that that was a boatload of food? Anyway, this supposed event is email glurge. Why believe it when almost nobody on this board believes any of the other email glurge that we post and laugh at every day? ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/125 "2005-02-10T15:40:24Z")
Wikipedia has a good article on [MRE’s](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MRE) that includes a surprising amount of history. It also lists calorie content as 1200 Calories per ration. ---
**Author:** ![Boldface\_Type](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5e925/32.png) [@Boldface\_Type](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boldface_Type)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/126 "2005-02-10T15:53:19Z")
> [@threemae](#): > > If a woman can actually get down 9,000 calories of MRE in a single day, well, scratch that, just no-one can. Hell, in the Tour de France, most riders do what, under 8,000 calories? > > Believe me, if you ate 9,000 calories in a single day, you’d sure as hell know it well before you stopped. It is fun to see everyone get their panties in a twist over this horrid misogyny. IIRC, TDF riders can sustain an intake of c.6,000kcal/day, as cited in Noakes’ _Lore of Running_ book. The person with the most impressive sustained calorie intake is the ultrarunner Yiannis Kouros who (again IIRC) could sustain an intake of c.8,000kcal/day for several days of continual running. If the woman in the story could take in 9,000kcal in one sitting, then she is either the size of a small planet or it was a leisurely meal, taking several days to complete while she jogged around the table. I found the story funny - it was obviously either completely invented, or exaggerated for comic effect. I’m surprised at the gullibility of the participants in this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/127 "2005-02-10T16:29:47Z")
> [@Agent Foxtrot](#): > > What the fuck kind of asshole fucks with someone like this, especially to someone they’re supposed to care about? I wouldn’t have done this shit to my worst enemy. You think it’s funny fucking with someone’s stomach like this? This email wasn’t funny, Ernie. It was extremely disturbing. > > Who knows, though. Maybe I’m overreacting. > > Adam I don’t think you’re overreacting. That’s messed up. I had my gallbladder out a few years ago, and it made my system kind of irritable - If I have a bit too much scalloped potatoes, for instance, it’s Montezuma’s Revenge for me that night. If Mr. AFG did to me what this guy did to his girlfriend (and I know he wouldn’t), he’d be out on his ass in the cold so fast. I would NOT find that funny. I’ve been to EHOWA and there’s some funny stuff on there, but this isn’t one of those things. ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/128 "2005-02-10T16:40:19Z")
Whoops - looks like I skimmed a bit. Seems the story’s most likely bogus. Scary thing is though, I don’t doubt that there’s some wacko out there who could possibly try this, and there’s gotta be a nutjob reading this somewhere, thinking, “Ha ha! I’m gonna do that!” ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/129 "2005-02-10T16:56:44Z")
> [@DMC](#): > > He’s an asshole. He says twice in his glurge (and quite specifically) that she alone consumed 9,000 calories, but I’ll even be nice and go along with this unsupported assertion that he meant half of that. Here’s a 4500ish calorie meal: > > 2 Big Mac - 1120 > 2 Large Fries - 1040 > 6 Krispy Kremes, glazed - 1200 > Budweiser (3 bottles) - 435 > Butter (1 stick) - 780 > > Double that menu if he’s actually telling the truth about how much she ate. Is there anyone who could put that away in a single sitting without being, at the very least, physically ill for a few days? Complete aside: I can, if you sub out the butter for more fries and some bbq sauce. =P ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/130 "2005-02-10T16:58:02Z")
> [@](#): > > She’s an adult right? And probably capable (I hope) of telling the difference in taste between vodka and table wine. > > It’s up to her to control her alcohol intake, not up to him to play baby sitter and tell her how much she’s allowed to have. Well Alcohol is a drug, and by your reasoning you could justify slipping acid into someone’s koolaid. Sorry I don’t buy it. It’s not up to him to babysit, but he does have some responsibility, such as not intentionally misrepresenting a high proof drink for a low one, especially as the taste was intentionally misrepresented, and vodka + cherry electrolyte is not a common drink that people have experence with. With thess factors, I would place full blame on him if she took in a lethal does, which it would seem she may have been approaing very quickly. I’m not saying she shouldn’t take respnsibility, if she notices she is getting hammered, but the quick intake along w/ the electrolytes, and food may have delayed this till it’s too late. As for the dinner, I have no issues with it. If he slipped exlax into her food, then yes, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/131 "2005-02-10T18:04:49Z")
> [@](#): > > **kanicbird** said: > Well Alcohol is a drug, and by your reasoning you could justify slipping acid into someone’s koolaid. Sorry I don’t buy it. > > It’s not up to him to babysit, but he does have some responsibility, such as not intentionally misrepresenting a high proof drink for a low one, especially as the taste was intentionally misrepresented, and vodka + cherry electrolyte is not a common drink that people have experence with. Who on earth wouldn’t notice that the drink in the decanter tasted nothing like wine and a lot like vodka? Even mixed with things, vodka has a distinctive taste. And as far as ‘misrepresenting’ it, it’s not like he put it into an empty bottle that used to contain wine, or told her that it was non-alcoholic. My impression was that he didn’t intend it to be mistaken for wine, he referred to it as ‘makeshift wine’ because most people drink wine rather than vodka with their dinner. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/132 "2005-02-10T18:18:14Z")
So nobody noticed that when the girlfriend dug into the dessert, she said, “Mm! Chocolate mousse!” So either she thinks chocolate mousse is low-calorie, in which case she is too dumb to be a Ranger’s girlfriend, or all the crap y’all are pitching about how the Ranger poisoned her with a mega-calorie meal without her knowing about it, is bullshit. I’ve eaten MREs. They can’t be used as poison. It’s a bullshit story. And most of you are over-reacting to it. Sheesh. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/133 "2005-02-10T18:43:34Z")
Link about contents of [MRE’s](http://www.usariem.army.mil/nutri/appenda.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/134 "2005-02-10T19:07:31Z")
So it seems even Dopers aren’t immune to falling for urban legends. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/135 "2005-02-10T19:52:55Z")
> [@](#): > > And as far as ‘misrepresenting’ it, it’s not like he put it into an empty bottle that used to contain wine, or told her that it was non-alcoholic. from the OP: > [@](#): > > ), and put the alcoholic drink in a crystal wine decanter. If the story it true or not, it really doesn’t matter. I see the only thing he did wrong was to basically spike her drink, you disagree, I can live with that. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/136 "2005-02-10T20:07:37Z")
I will say again that the character’s intentions in making the meal do not matter. He’s STILL a fucking dickrag just for laughing at his girlfriend’s illness and suffering, He’s a DOUBLE dickrag for gloating about it on the internet. (I know the story is bullshit. The CHARACTER is a dickrag) ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/137 "2005-02-10T21:02:17Z")
> [@](#): > > He’s STILL a fucking dickrag just for laughing at his girlfriend’s illness and suffering, He’s a DOUBLE dickrag for gloating about it on the internet. I somehow missed this, though sometimes you can’t help laughing even if you also are concerned. But (if this really happened) he would be a richardrag for posting the story w/o her consent. ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/138 "2005-02-10T22:19:11Z")
> [@pepperlandgirl](#): > > I do disagree with your claim that nobody gets the raving farts 30 minutes after a meal. If there _was_ something in the meal that she was allergic too then it’s very possible. I know that if I eat sour cream, I can expect to run to the bathroom within 30-45 minutes. My body has a strong and immediate reaction to certain forms of dairy… Not experiencing foaming raving farts 30 minutes after eating, I must defer to those who do. My apologies to the unfortunates who lack that tiny little enzyme. However, I don’t think that’s really what was at work in the story. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/139 "2005-02-10T23:17:27Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Something similar to that has happened to me before. I’m an engineer, so my life’s about math, science, logical rules, and hard data. I was actually told by some nutwack on the now-defunct CNN Women in Society forum that ‘mathematics is misogyny because it feeds men’s need for strict rules and does not foster the women’s needs for feeling and lattitude.’ > > Wild, eh? Wild, with a side order of idiotic, not to mention extremely insulting to all the women who could kick _my_ butt (mathematically speaking), for a start. But then we live in a world in which (no cite) Naomi Wolf’s book _The Beauty Myth_ was slated for being “exclusionary towards women who are unable to read”. (Please note the lack of a significant comma after the word “women” before you – not you, **catsix** – get on my case about women’s literacy.) Wild, indeed. ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2005, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324/140 "2005-02-10T23:30:11Z")
> [@Agent Foxtrot](#): > > Oh, and need I make mention of the incredible strain this must’ve had on her pancreas? This is why we are told to eat six smaller meals a day: it’s easier on the pancreas. If she had a weak one, it could’ve torn itself to pieces. > > Adam This is probably the funniest think I’ve read in ages. I just ate a huge meal- OH, MY ACHING PANCREAS!!! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wtf-kind-of-person-would-do-this-to-his-girlfriend/289324.md?page=8)