# WWJD? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 9, 2001, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847 "2001-07-09T16:59:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![alibey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@alibey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alibey)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/1 "2001-07-09T16:59:20Z")
What Would Jesus Drive In the paper this weekend there was a story about a group of who are trying to have us make our vehicle purchase on what some guy 2000 odd years ago would choose. Now in my opinion he would choose something along the lines of horse or mule drawn, it just does not relate to well in these times. The morning DJs (Bob and Tom) were talking about it and read a letter from a listener who suggest that Jesus would drive a Harley 🙂 Now personaly I do my vehicle buying desions based on what I can afford and what I will use it for, not on what some dead guy thinks. Does this seem odd to anyone else? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/2 "2001-07-09T17:07:03Z")
**Man 1:** Should I finish college? **Rabbi Krustofsky:** Yes. No one is poor except he who lacks knowledge. **Woman carrying baby:** Rabbi, should I have another child? **Rabbi K:** Yes. Another child would be a blessing on your house. **Man 2:** Rabbi, should I buy a Chrysler? **Rabbi K:** Eh, couldn’t you rephrase that as a, as an ethical question? **Man 2:** Um… is it _right_ to buy a Chrysler? **Rabbi K:** Oh, yes! For great is the car with power steering and dynaflow suspension! ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/3 "2001-07-09T17:13:07Z")
I just wanted to pipe that when they were talking about Jesus riding a Harley, I almost choked on my OJ…not a good thing while merging onto the highway. “Think about it, he’s got the beard and long hair. He hangs out with the undesirables. A Harley is fuel efficient…” hehe [sub]Speaking of B&T, don’t forget that DaVinci’s Notebook is gonna be there tomorrow![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/4 "2001-07-09T17:13:28Z")
A Christler? Whatever, it’d have one of those fish thingies on the back. ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/5 "2001-07-09T17:13:33Z")
Why would Jesus drive anything? I mean the guy could friggin’ walk on water. ---
**Author:** ![iceman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/46a35a/32.png) [@iceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iceman)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/6 "2001-07-09T17:29:51Z")
A minivan. I mean, how you gonna fit 12 apostles in a Subaru? I wonder if he could drive on water? ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/7 "2001-07-09T17:49:22Z")
A Christler, oh Jesus, I am dying! Outstanding post! Let’s see- the long hair, the sandals- yep, I’m leaning towards a VW bus. What was that line from the song _Convoy_? “Eleven long-haired Friends of Jesus in a chartruese Microbus.” Where did I pull **that** lyric from? Whoa… I love Bob & Tom- in LA, they had a commercial on the air for their show, set in front of a urinal. They are peeing when Dennis Rodman walks up between them & starts peeing too. Bob & Tom look down at Rodman’s lower half, and the dialog starts- B & T- “Wow, that thing is huge! That’s a hoss!” etc… DR- “Well, I like it. And the ladies do too.” B & T- “Mind if we take a closer look?” DR- “Not at all.” Than Rodman holds up his hand, and they’ve been eyeing his NBA champoinship ring, not his johnson. I laughed my ASS off! Rodman was actually quite funny. Not so funny when he lives in your neighborhood, though… But that’s another rant. ---
**Author:** ![Sterra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Sterra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sterra)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/8 "2001-07-09T17:57:15Z")
Which leads to another question. [What would Jesus do with his hair?](http://www.postfun.com/pfp/features/98/sep/wwjd.html) ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/9 "2001-07-09T19:17:49Z")
[screaming blue messiahs] Jesus Chrysler Drives A Dodge! [/screaming blue messiahs] ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/10 "2001-07-09T22:43:05Z")
I kinda picture Jesus behind the wheels of an Excursion. Hey… **fatherjohn** must’ve been Jewish! ---
**Author:** ![Menocchio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@Menocchio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Menocchio)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/11 "2001-07-09T23:06:27Z")
Jesus drove his dad’s car, a honda, but he didn’t like to talk about it. “For I do not speak of my own **Accord** but of my father’s.” He apparently had a two-car garage, at least, for he was said to have driven the moneychangers out of the temple in a **Fury**. ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2001, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/12 "2001-07-09T23:17:17Z")
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I have nothing to add to this thread, but Menocchio, that is the funniest thing I have seen all day. I now have a headache, it’s your fault. (Still laughing minutes later.) I dunno, I could picture Jesus in an MG convertible, sunglasses, tooling down the turnpike at 80. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/13 "2001-07-10T00:09:50Z")
\> “For I do not speak of my own Accord but of my father’s.” Can’t top that. Jesus doesn’t drive AMC, according to Obadiah 1:1-2. “We have heard a rumour from the LORD, and an **ambassador** is sent among the heathen, Arise ye, and let us rise up against her in battle.” The right-wing fundies would have us believe that Jesus would be driving an American-made Cadillac Escalade, fully loaded. In reality, He’d probably be happy in an old VW Bug, 20 year old Subaru, or in posession of a public transit pass. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/14 "2001-07-10T02:13:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LNO \* > \*\ ***Man 1:** Should I finish college? > **Rabbi Krustofsky:** Yes. No one is poor except he who lacks knowledge. > **Woman carrying baby:** Rabbi, should I have another child? > **Rabbi K:** Yes. Another child would be a blessing on your house. > **Man 2:** Rabbi, should I buy a Chrysler? > **Rabbi K:** Eh, couldn’t you rephrase that as a, as an ethical question? > **Man 2:** Um… is it _right_ to buy a Chrysler? > **Rabbi K:** Oh, yes! For great is the car with power steering and dynaflow suspension! > \*\* What about a Canyonero? “She blinds everybody with her super high beams, She’s a squirrel crushing, deer smacking, driving machine!” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/15 "2001-07-10T04:01:55Z")
Canyonerooooooo! Canyoneroooo! _wa-pish_ ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/16 "2001-07-10T11:48:51Z")
yes, but I have to ask, what would John Corrado drive? ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/17 "2001-07-10T18:49:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Menocchio \* > \*\*Jesus drove his dad’s car, a honda, but he didn’t like to talk about it. > > “For I do not speak of my own **Accord** but of my father’s.” > > He apparently had a two-car garage, at least, for he was said to have driven the moneychangers out of the temple in a **Fury**. > > \*\* One of the great Universal Mysteries is finally solved. God drives a Japanese car. Assuming that he hasn’t since traded it in for a Kia, I wonder if it is still in good shape after 2000 years . I am going to pray to try to find out the mileage and see if he might be willing to let it go cheap. I just hope that I would’t have to go to Heaven to pick it up :eek ---
**Author:** ![red\_dragon60](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@red\_dragon60](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/red_dragon60)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2001, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/18 "2001-07-10T20:23:35Z")
Let me guess, 105.7FM, from Columbus Ohio. Sounds a lot like DJs around here. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/19 "2001-07-11T03:48:00Z")
Damn, I thought that this would be a rant about those stupid WWJD wristbands people wear or those bumperstickers that say, “The Death Penalty: WWJD?” To me the answer seems pretty obvious: He’d die like he did the last time, morons! PS Am I the only guy out there who thinks, “Jesus would say I need a blowjob!” when he sees a cute chick sporting one of those WWJD wristbands? ---
**Author:** ![BooBoo316](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e0b2c6/32.png) [@BooBoo316](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BooBoo316)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2001, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847/20 "2001-07-11T07:46:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TwistofFate \* > \*\*yes, but I have to ask, what would John Corrado drive? \*\* Probably one of those kit cars, you know, the Porsche built on the VW Bug chassis. That way his ride would be just a fake as he is. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wwjd/71847.md?page=2)