# Xena VS Buffy: Who'd win? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 6, 2001, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192 "2001-08-06T22:24:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![seriousart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@seriousart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seriousart)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/1 "2001-08-06T22:24:58Z")
To Hell with the Star Destroyer/ Enterprise debates. Who, in a cat-fight royale, would win if these two fictional characters were to duke it out? Personally, I favor Buffy, at least if she had the Scooby Gang in tow. They’re crafty devils. One on one, I’m not so sure. How about you? ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/2 "2001-08-06T22:30:16Z")
No contest. Xena would break Buffy like the twig she is. ---
**Author:** ![Turbo\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@Turbo\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turbo_Dog)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/3 "2001-08-06T22:35:46Z")
Xena and Buffy in a catfight? Who cares who would win!!! That would be almost as good as when Xena and Callisto would fight… \ In the end, Xena would peel Buffy like a grape, roll her in sugar and swallow her whole. Wow…nice visual though:) ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/4 "2001-08-06T22:46:53Z")
Voice of Dissent chiming in… In a mano a mano, no weaopns allowed, Buffy would kick Xena’s ass. She’s taken on bigger and badder. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/5 "2001-08-06T22:52:54Z")
D o n ’ t s a y I d i d n ’ t w a r n y o u They’ve both fought gods and won. On the other hand Buffy died in the process. On the other other hand, Glorificus is…well, WAS, a HELL of a lot more powerful than Ares (Pun intended). Hell, Glory’s more powerful than the entire Herc/Xena pantheon put together. Hands down to the Slayer. ---
**Author:** ![Manach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Manach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manach)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/6 "2001-08-06T23:01:54Z")
Buffy, if only because she is the master of the bon mot 1-liners. ---
**Author:** ![BeoWulf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f9ae1b/32.png) [@BeoWulf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeoWulf)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/7 "2001-08-06T23:08:06Z")
Heh, as long as it would be on pay per view I wouldn’t care. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/8 "2001-08-06T23:18:35Z")
Xena, easy. Buffy would probably faint from hunger before the fight even began. ---
**Author:** ![kasuo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8c91f0/32.png) [@kasuo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kasuo)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/9 "2001-08-06T23:20:17Z")
S P O I L E R W A R N I N G I T H I N K . . > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tengu \* > \*\* > They’ve both fought gods and won. > > On the other hand Buffy died in the process. > \*\* Hasn’t Xena died a couple times as well? It seems like she has a way of coming back to life. I assume that will be the same for Buffy as her show will be on UPN in a couple months. I wonder if Eliza Dushku will make some guest appearances… ::drool:: [hijack] Is it true that there will be a **True Lies** sequel? Will Eliza be back? 😃 [/hijack] ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/10 "2001-08-06T23:28:23Z")
Buffy, within 15 seconds. She’s faster, she’s stronger, she’s a smaller target. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/11 "2001-08-06T23:30:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kasuo \* > \*\*S > P > O > I > L > E > R > > W > A > R > N > I > N > G > > I > > T > H > I > N > K > . > . > > Hasn’t Xena died a couple times as well?\*\* At least once, I think. I’m not a huge Xena fan. (This’s death #2 for Buffy) > [@](#): > > **I assume that will be the same for Buffy as her show will be on UPN in a couple months.** Yeah, Buff’ll be back. Joss’s said so. (Giles is going recurring rather than regular (:() and Tara’s not becoming a regular (:(), so it’s not all good news… But, oh well.) ---
**Author:** ![seriousart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@seriousart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seriousart)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2001, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/12 "2001-08-06T23:46:14Z")
Though Buffy may have her witticisms, Xena’s got that crazy “Aye-yeyeyeyeyey!” thing going for her. Might be enough to freak Buffy out long enough to get a sucker punch in. As a side note, my friend Adam has just heard word that his friend in LA is now dating Callisto of Xena fame. She’s supposed to be going to Adam’s wedding in Cleveland. The bride-to-be is not pleased from what I understand. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/13 "2001-08-07T01:34:49Z")
All I want to know is what channel and where my blank tape is. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/14 "2001-08-07T01:51:36Z")
Sha! Duh! Buffy would totally win because, well, because I like that show better! Which is basically what these arguments always boil down to. Besides, what are the terms of the fight? Barehanded, or can they use weapons? Alone, or with allies? Buffy’s got rocket launchers, magic troll hammers, bad-ass lesbian witches, Xander with a wrecking ball, and two tame vampires. What’s Xena got? A frisbee and a blonde with a stick. ---
**Author:** ![capacitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e47774/32.png) [@capacitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/capacitor)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/15 "2001-08-07T03:00:39Z")
Ahh, but Xena in the last episode set of a nuclear bomb with a supply of gunpowder, oil, and a well-thrown chakram. She is much more resourceful than the relative newbie Buffy. Buffy needs Willow, Xander, Giles and Spike much more than Xena needs Gabs and Joxer. Hey, I have an idea. Have the referee be Dana Scully. Have Xena visit _X-Files_ as a ghost (Lucy Lawless will be there anyway), menacing some town, then have Buffy try to take care of her. ---
**Author:** ![Lyllyan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b2d939/32.png) [@Lyllyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lyllyan)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/16 "2001-08-07T04:01:34Z")
The Buffmeister would win, and she would say funny things whilst whipping upon Xena’s rather large ass. And Xander would be in the sideline, also making sarcastic but funny quips. And then Spike would rush in and bite Zena and piss Buffy off. Oh yeah, it would be great! ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/17 "2001-08-07T04:10:25Z")
Size and skill have nothing to do with it, folks. Buffy has KILLER INSTINCT. Ninety percent of the time she fights someone, she doesn’t just beat them up, she friggin’ terminates them. Kaput, see ya later. Xena, on the other hand, usually pulls the “A-Team Trick” of causing much sound and fury without killing anyone. She’d let up at the wrong moment, and Buffy would kill her as dead as a doornail. ---
**Author:** ![xcheopis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/bc8723/32.png) [@xcheopis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xcheopis)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/18 "2001-08-07T04:51:47Z")
Buffy, no doubt about it. Buffy is the Slayer; Xena is just a way-buffed normal. It doesn’t matter how loud the zaghareets are if you’re up against someone whose job is to kill vampires. ---
**Author:** ![seriousart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@seriousart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seriousart)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/19 "2001-08-07T05:19:58Z")
All this chat about Buffy’s “killer instinct”. Don’t forget though, Xena’s no vampire. She’s not even a demon. Buffy, last time I checked, goes a little soft on the mortals. Giles had to finish the job on Glorificus’ human form in the last WB episode. But then, Xena seems to have a weakness for blonde girls, so perhaps she’s at an equal disadvantage…😃 ---
**Author:** ![Boxcar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Boxcar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boxcar)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2001, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192/20 "2001-08-07T15:33:46Z")
**RickJay** says > [@](#): > > Buffy has KILLER INSTINCT Xena doesn’t? Even the ‘good’ Xena of the series has committed her fair share of assasinations and cold-blooded killing. Her background is even darker. There is evidence that in the pre-Gabriel days Xenas’ _modus-operandi_ was the slaughter of any who opposed her, even after their capture. The fight would probably be pretty boring since both are supposed to be on the side of good. They’d probably talk each other to death. On the other hand, I would watch the oil wrestling match between the two… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/xena-vs-buffy-whod-win/75192.md?page=2)