# Yeah, he's gay - keep your comments to yourself, jackass. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 4, 2001, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848 "2001-04-04T23:47:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Wabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wabbit)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/21 "2001-04-06T01:42:18Z")
I don’t really care about the ‘straight-gay’ thing, but anyone who carries around, owns, looks at or otherwise interacts with one of those annoying little rat/canine mutants should be shot. Guess I should include smirkie here _sigh_. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![zwaldd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a9adbd/32.png) [@zwaldd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zwaldd)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/22 "2001-04-06T03:47:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > **But does that mean he should be mocked for [carrying around the dog]?** i don’t see how mocking a guy for carrying a dog is “homophobic” unless dog carrying is integral to homosexuality. > [@](#): > > \*\*And carrying around your dog is not “normal homosexual behavior” - it’s not normal _any_sexual behavior. \*\* sorry, i assumed that’s what you were implying when you said: “And furthermore, Einstein, he’s a 100% grade-A fairy - having earrings and doting on a dog is par for the course.” ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/23 "2001-04-06T06:51:36Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **zwaldd** _ > > i don’t see how mocking a guy for carrying a dog is “homophobic” unless dog carrying is integral to homosexuality. Context - it was clear why he said what he said. > [@](#): > > sorry, i assumed that’s what you were implying… It’s not normal, but it is _stereotypical_. The two words are not the same. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/24 "2001-04-06T14:19:14Z")
Esprix isn’t heterophobic. He clearly indicated he loves me and I’m not even gay. At least I don’t think I am. I do own a small dog though. I don’t pick her up too often because she’ll pee on me. I’m not sure if her urinary tract problem has anything to do with my sexuality, but it’s certainly worth researching. Esprix, if you gotta rant, you gotta rant. I think the pit is a much better solution than a sawed off on the clock tower aiming at student nurses. Everyone gets cranky now and again. Be as cranky as an old man if you want to. Hell, be crankyasanoldman! She wouldn’t mind. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/25 "2001-04-06T14:40:40Z")
> [@](#): > > I don’t see how mocking a guy for carrying a dog is “homophobic” unless dog carrying is integral to homosexuality. “Wow, that’s one big, furry brooch you have on today, Esprix.” ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/26 "2001-04-06T14:56:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by goboy \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > I don’t see how mocking a guy for carrying a dog is “homophobic” unless dog carrying is integral to homosexuality. > > “Wow, that’s one big, furry brooch you have on today, Esprix.”\*\* “Gosh – how do you get your chest hair to do that?” “Excuse me, but you seem to have a large lint ball stuck to your shirt there…” ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/27 "2001-04-06T15:06:36Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **zwaldd** _ > i don’t see how mocking a guy for carrying a dog is “homophobic” unless dog carrying is integral to homosexuality. Supposing I’m sashaying down Ste Catherine Street in a pair of tight jeans, a Hawaiian shirt, and a silk kerchief, lisping loudly with some friends about what’s on sale at the Gap. (I put that last part in so you know it’s not the truth. I hate the Gap. :)) And then supposing I get my ass beaten by a bunch of large gentlemen yelling “Faggot!” Now, what they are specifically objecting to at the time is my habit of sashaying, wearing tight jeans, etc., none of which is “integral to homosexuality,” as you put it. However, are you really going to tell me that gay-bashers of this sort aren’t homophobic, regardless of whether their attack is occassioned by something other than directly observing me committing sodomy? I know the guy in question isn’t actually beating anyone up, but the principle is the same. If you mock someone for acting “gay”, it’s as homophobic as if you mock them for actually _being_ gay. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/28 "2001-04-06T15:09:55Z")
What Matt said. Homophobia, dude, that’s so gay! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![zwaldd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a9adbd/32.png) [@zwaldd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zwaldd)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/29 "2001-04-06T16:06:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \* > **If you mock someone for acting “gay”, it’s as homophobic as if you mock them for actually _being_ gay.** if i saw a kid dressed in gangsta garb, i might say something like ‘get a load of that kid’s outfit’ and i may even say it in such a way as to make it clear that i think dressing like a gangsta is stupid. if the kid is black, does that make me blackophobic? ---
**Author:** ![squib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@squib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squib)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/30 "2001-04-06T17:11:11Z")
Gawd. Take it however it pleases you, Esprix. Your taking offense is ironic in the context of this thread. Anyway, I didn’t mean to get you bent out of shape. Sorry if I did. That agent is a real neaderfuck. Feel better? ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/31 "2001-04-06T18:08:54Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **zwaldd** _ > > if i saw a kid dressed in gangsta garb, i might say something like ‘get a load of that kid’s outfit’ and i may even say it in such a way as to make it clear that i think dressing like a gangsta is stupid. if the kid is black, does that make me blackophobic? Gangsta clothes are _stereotypically_ black, so if you make the comment, and the kid is black, don’t be surprised if everyone assumes you are, indeed, racist. However, your tone of delivery might say otherwise - only the listener can be the judge. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by **squib** > > Gawd. Take it however it pleases you, Esprix. Your taking offense is ironic in the context of this thread. Thanks for your permission. How is being offended by an offensive comment ironic? As I said, he’s welcome to his opinion, but by sharing it with me he made himself out to be a horse’s ass, and offended me in the process. Should one be so open-minded about other people’s opinions that they should allow them to maliciously hurt others in the process? That’s where I draw the line - where do you? Esprix ---
**Author:** ![zwaldd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a9adbd/32.png) [@zwaldd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zwaldd)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/32 "2001-04-06T19:03:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > **Gangsta clothes are _stereotypically_ black, so if you make the comment, and the kid is black, don’t be surprised if everyone assumes you are, indeed, racist.** if you equate disrespect for gaudy clothes and foolish behavior with racism and homophobia, then i’ve got news for you. you’ve got a lifetime of ranting ahead (although something tells me you already knew that). ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/33 "2001-04-06T19:24:37Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **zwaldd** _ > > if you equate disrespect for gaudy clothes and foolish behavior with racism and homophobia, then i’ve got news for you. you’ve got a lifetime of ranting ahead (although something tells me you already knew that). I don’t. Once again, please - it’s all about _context_. The person making the remark was, IMHO, meaning it to be as anti-gay as it was anti-canine - I was there, I saw him, I heard it, and that’s what I got from it. And no, I do not seek out homophobia in every little thing people say, but I still manage to find it. Was I only supposed to be upset if he called the guy a fucking queer? Please - homophobia or just being a jackass, either way it was a fucking rude and inappropriate thing to say; furthermore, there was no reason for it to be said in the first place (particularly in a workplace), and I’d have been much happier if he’d kept his ignorant opinion to himself. Yes, overly sensitive me - I’m so wrong for being offended when people insult others. :rolleyees: Esprix ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/34 "2001-04-06T21:28:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > > Gangsta clothes are _stereotypically_ black, so if you make the comment, and the kid is black, don’t be surprised if everyone assumes you are, indeed, racist. Uh Esprix that could be taken as a very racist remark on your part. Uh _stereotypically black_? More like stereotypically gangsta. I work around alot of people who choose the “gangsta” mode of dress. Guess what, its not any more stereotypically black than any other ethnic origin in my experience. If you want to walk the walk and talk the talk, prepare to be treated like it. I do not feel homophobics (or gangstaphobics) are justified in taunting, teasing, assaulting, etc, people who “look the part” but if you’re going to look/act/be the part be prepared to be treated accordingly by those who don’t like it. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/35 "2001-04-06T21:42:18Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **drachillix** _ > > If you want to walk the walk and talk the talk, prepare to be treated like it. > > I do not feel homophobics (or gangstaphobics) are justified in taunting, teasing, assaulting, etc, people who “look the part” but if you’re going to look/act/be the part be prepared to be treated accordingly by those who don’t like it. I see - so not only is it socially acceptable to allow people to mock them for “walking the walk,” but it seems those who do get what they deserve. If you do not feel people are justified in taunting and teasing, then don’t justify it. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/36 "2001-04-06T22:22:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by drachillix \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > > > > Gangsta clothes are _stereotypically_ black, so if you make the comment, and the kid is black, don’t be surprised if everyone assumes you are, indeed, racist. > > Uh Esprix that could be taken as a very racist remark on your part. > \*\* You are joking, right? When **descriptions** of racist beliefs start to be mistaken for the beliefs themselves, it’s probably time to stop writing. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/37 "2001-04-06T23:25:37Z")
I’ve read every post on this thread twice now. I usually read the threads involving cruelty more avidly than I do most others. I know my responses are neither welcome nor unwelcome, and knowing that always makes it somewhat disheartening when someone as inarticulate as myself laboriously composes his thoughts. But since each of you chose not to keep it bottled up, here’s how it spilled out on me: The “give him the benefit of the doubt” angle: White people generally are afraid to instigate discussions about race with Black people. This probably holds true between straight and gay people, too. One of the few “Why bother? I’ll just put my foot in it” situations that people ARE willing to surmount is the search for love, and another is the pursuit of a livelihood based on selling. In both these two situations people often break the ice with a joke. Few of us are good jokers. The “don’t give him the benefit of the doubt” angle: As a rule on thumb, white middle-age guys, conservative or liberal, gay or straight, are pretty set in their ways. I know because I am one. As we made our way through life we had to find our reward systems, spiritual and financial, and those systems without fail demand sacrifices. The “neaderfuck” (neanderfuck?) Esprix encountered chose to sacrifice kindness. Not only was he cruel to the decorator, but he was condescending to Esprix. He might weasel-think the first excusable because the decorator was unaware of it; but I call bullshit on the second offense, committed in a place of business where Esprix, the decorator and the agent are all equals under life’s obligation to earn one’s living. As for the whole issue of homophobia: wasn’t there a psychological examination on prisoners convicted of violent crimes against gays, using that expandable wiener-ring also used on pedophiles, that proved that homophobes are actually gay? In which case Mr. Neaderfuck is Zeus in the executive suite besotted with the latest Ganymede sent over by the temp agency. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2001, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848/38 "2001-04-06T23:35:44Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **Slithy Tove** _ > > In which case Mr. Neaderfuck is Zeus in the executive suite besotted with the latest Ganymede sent over by the temp agency. My cup most assured doth not runneth over. \ Ganymede, however, under less unsavory circumstances, is a moniker I’ll take. Esprix [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yeah-hes-gay-keep-your-comments-to-yourself-jackass/60848.md?page=1)