# Yet another "For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn" thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 15, 2013, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361 "2013-02-15T03:08:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/1 "2013-02-15T03:08:58Z")
[It’s been awhile](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=504312) since we did this. The rules: post a story, six words or [del]less[/del] fewer. I closed my eyes, and grunted. “Get back your barstool, Daddy.” We timed her menstrual cycles, halfheartedly. It’s not _that_ revolting. Just off-putting. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/2 "2013-02-15T03:14:17Z")
It popped like a grape. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/3 "2013-02-15T03:20:21Z")
“Remember birdsong?” My wife actually said that to me the other night. ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/4 "2013-02-15T03:25:05Z")
She wept, and then farted, wetly. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/5 "2013-02-15T03:26:46Z")
I slapped that jerk _hard_. Got Massed up then ashed yesterday. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/6 "2013-02-15T03:29:48Z")
Two hearts, one bed, one life. ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/7 "2013-02-15T03:30:40Z")
I saw you with my sister. Sometimes things make sense, with whiskey. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/8 "2013-02-15T03:49:36Z")
Boy meets girl. Sometimes, that’s it. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/9 "2013-02-15T04:14:52Z")
For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn, 25 pair (our late uncle had some highly unusual fetishes). :o ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/10 "2013-02-15T06:09:30Z")
“Let him go Patagonia. He belongs to the earth” “Smell my smell!!” she screamed, lurching after him in her scuffed red Blahniks. “Me Chinese, me play joke” purred Chang as the fondled the rusted Colt Dragoon. “Put away that broom. One Chester White’s all a grown man can handle son”. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/11 "2013-02-15T06:28:07Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn, 25 pair (our late uncle had some highly unusual fetishes). :o > [@astro](#): > > “Let him go Patagonia. He belongs to the earth” > > “Smell my smell!!” she screamed, lurching after him in her scuffed red Blahniks. > > “Me Chinese, me play joke” purred Chang as the fondled the rusted Colt Dragoon. > > “Put away that broom. One Chester White’s all a grown man can handle son”. Let me guess. You guys go through the “six items or less” lane at the supermarket with a cart full of groceries too. ---
**Author:** ![Beastly\_Rotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/45deac/32.png) [@Beastly\_Rotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beastly_Rotter)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/12 "2013-02-15T06:31:59Z")
Close the curtains, Geoffrey, I’m amphibious. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/13 "2013-02-15T06:32:34Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Two hearts, one bed, one life. For sale: one bed. Divorce costs. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/14 "2013-02-15T06:41:39Z")
Never, _ever_ speed-read the Necronomicon. People really do taste like pork. “She’s got _teeth_ down there!” The flamethrower; an ideal problem solver. ---
**Author:** ![Tamex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Tamex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamex)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/15 "2013-02-15T06:49:08Z")
“Will you marry me?” She laughed. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/16 "2013-02-15T06:57:59Z")
Dinner: cucumbersalad with tears and vinegar. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/17 "2013-02-15T07:07:42Z")
Dead ate living; all gone. Tasty. All is lost. Sauron has it. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/18 "2013-02-15T07:09:15Z")
Who killed Mr. Smith? The Butler. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/19 "2013-02-15T07:20:15Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Let me guess. You guys go through the “six items or less” lane at the supermarket with a cart full of groceries too. ’ The pedant shrieked his arms akimbo. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/20 "2013-02-15T07:24:55Z")
Joker’s loose again. Stupid Arkham. Punisher? Puff meets Smaug. Bite sized. Yum. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361.md?page=2)