# Yet another "For Sale: Baby Shoes, Never Worn" thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 15, 2013, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361 "2013-02-15T03:08:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/41 "2013-02-15T15:21:09Z")
He paid his date and slept. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/42 "2013-02-15T15:49:14Z")
Guy hunts whale; ship sinks. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/43 "2013-02-15T15:59:47Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Let me guess. You guys go through the “six items or less” lane at the supermarket with a cart full of groceries too. Nah, they are contributing to another art form, the one sentence stories. More of those at [http://www.onesentence.org/](http://www.onesentence.org/) It’s hard though, to make the six word stories a real sentence and not some evocative key words. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/44 "2013-02-15T16:14:13Z")
Swallowed whole, it crawled back out. In retrospect, he shouldn’t have exploded. “Is that _whale semen_ you’re using?” Fucking magnets. How do they work? He touched it. It quivered moistly. The stench of corpulence surrounded them. The grass blades had tiny mouths. “Whose spleen is this?” he demanded. The puppies came in the night. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/45 "2013-02-15T16:33:11Z")
The Sun rose in the West. From Brian Aldiss, who was challenged to write the shortest SF story possible. “That morning, the Sun rose in the west.” I shortened it per contest rules. ---
**Author:** ![tim314](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim314/32/3468_2.png) [@tim314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tim314)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/46 "2013-02-15T16:41:44Z")
Mine’s crap. Guess I’m no Hemingway. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/47 "2013-02-15T16:41:59Z")
It turns out vampires are real. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/48 "2013-02-15T16:45:32Z")
The Mojave Ocean glistened. She went out with the tide. All the hummingbirds sang in unison. On that horrible day, nobody died. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/49 "2013-02-15T16:54:58Z")
> [@Beastly\_Rotter](#): > > Funeral wreaths make poor wedding bouquets. Bravo. > [@Sampiro](#): > > Beauty may fade, bitterness is loyal. Bravo. > [@Maastricht](#): > > Threw rock at mirror. Reflection screamed. Bravo. She whimpered once, then stifled it. Rescue was but a numb hallucination. Legalized marriage. If only he’d lived. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/50 "2013-02-15T16:55:28Z")
He worried he impregnated the mummy. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/51 "2013-02-15T17:05:01Z")
“Facebook has gained sentience! Run!” Her skin crawled off and away. In the end, the ants won. They smiled, watching the moon crumble. Centuries later they found the remote. ---
**Author:** ![MegaBee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f0a364/32.png) [@MegaBee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MegaBee)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/52 "2013-02-15T17:05:23Z")
“I’ll always remember.” “No, you won’t.” ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/53 "2013-02-15T17:13:14Z")
But the cake was death too… “Can we keep him, Mom?” “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!” “Don’t cry, sweetie; scars are beautiful.” Frederick’s afterlife did not go as planned. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/54 "2013-02-15T17:14:51Z")
Rape? She says “yes”, I “no”. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/55 "2013-02-15T17:19:29Z")
The taillights vanished. She wept ironically. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/56 "2013-02-15T17:21:19Z")
The bake-off ended in cleansing fire. Gigantic chinchillas cannot be reasoned with. She suffocated under the cookie dough. James Woods: “Ooo - piece of candy!” ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/57 "2013-02-15T17:22:30Z")
Lions, Tigers and Bears! Oh crap! Not Gay? 6th Beer. Blow Job! Russian Roulette: You only lose once. Love, marriage. You horse, me carriage. Lap top, lap dance? Same results. Love was blind, reality was 3D. Payday! Damn, gone in 60 seconds. Corvette $4.95 - Splitting profit with ex. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/58 "2013-02-15T17:24:07Z")
Superman’s power nothing, this is better. The doctor said ‘inoperable’, I laughed. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/59 "2013-02-15T17:28:37Z")
Time travel destination only I’ve picked. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361/60 "2013-02-15T17:40:21Z")
She held that flower for months. As the lemur leaped, it laughed. Hulk say purple pants too tight! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yet-another-for-sale-baby-shoes-never-worn-thread/650361.md?page=4)