# Yo lezlers- if you got something to say to me, just say it. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 17, 2010, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460 "2010-04-17T16:08:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/1 "2010-04-17T16:08:26Z")
Hey lezlers! You know you have something to say, so go on and say it! Really, bring it on. Get it out. You’ll feel better once you let go! It’s become pretty obvious that you prefer to be snide and passive aggressive in your social dealings, so I’ll make this one easy for ya. So you don’t like my advice on the apparently emotionally sensitive issue of [party etiquette](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=559859). I maintain that “I’m so angry that I’m going to go to this party and do everything she asks without question. You know, she’s so unreasonable and demanding that I’m gonna bring cookies that nobody even asked me to bring. But I’ll be _really resentful_ about it. That’ll show her!” is a silly way of dealing with the situation. YMMV. You are free to interpret this as a personal attack. It’s not how it was intended, but it seems like you are fond of feeling personally attacked. If you don’t like what I have to say, please, I encourage you to use the “ignore function.” I learned about the “ignore” function when I was communing with the elephants in Cameroon. I had a friend who didn’t ignore easily avoided strangers on the internet and she caught measles! Ever since them I’ve learned the “ignore” feature makes one a more balanced and happy person. You don’t want measles, do you? Really, woman, my plan was to just let this one play itself out. I’m a person with strong opinions and specialized interests, and I realize that’s gonna be a take-it-or-leave-it thing. Hopefully some people think I have interesting stuff to contribute. And I hope those that think I’m repetitive or condescending skip or skim past my posts without getting too bothered. I’m totally cool with the fact that I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, and I hope people who I annoy just disregard me. I’m not here to make anyone angry. But you keep dragging the “dead horse” out to beat it again. Cool. I’ll tell you what I really think. I think you either have the emotional resilience of an eight year old girl up past her bedtime, or you just plain get off on the righteous anger that feeling wronged gets you. You walk into every interaction carrying a huge load of expectations precisely so that you can feel important and resentful when they amazingly don’t live up to them. You look around the world and see a bunch of people who just don’t treat you like they should. Congrats! You’ve finally figured out that the world is out to disappoint and attack you. Even strangers on the internet are just so wrong for not respecting your feelings! Well, enjoy your disappointed life! You get what you ask for. See how nice it is to say what you mean instead of being all passive-aggressive and evasive about it? Now it’s your turn. Go ahead. It’s cool. Sheesh. ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/2 "2010-04-17T16:21:08Z")
Dude, just look at my last post in the party thread, pretty much sums it up. Your posts irritate me, I find them condescending and judgmental. My responses to you in the party thread were hardly flames and your characterization of my OP is just a wee bit off base. Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Sorry to dissapoint. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/3 "2010-04-17T16:22:49Z")
And prize for most unnecessary pit thread goes to… ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/4 "2010-04-17T16:24:54Z")
In case you didn’t want to bother reading it: > [@Is this "hostess" totally out of line?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-hostess-totally-out-of-line/536290/146): > > Thanks, **BigT** , that was exactly it. There was a bit of residual resentment from prior threads mixed in there too. I realize I was asking for people’s opinions. There is, however, a difference between giving your own opinion and telling someone else they shouldn’t be feeling what they’re feeling in a certain situation. Especially when it’s done in a condescending way, such as giving anctedotes about people who live lives of bitterness because they aren’t enlightened enough to magically avoid getting irritated by anything in life. :rolleyes: You can offer advice about what to _do_ in a situation, but telling someone thier feelings are “silly” or wrong because you don’t agree with them is indeed condescending and far from productive. If it bothers you that much that someone thinks this about you, maybe you should change the way you “give advice” on the boards. _shrug_ ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/5 "2010-04-17T16:24:51Z")
Hey, it’s not over yet. Anyone else got something to say? Hate Cameroon? Got a comment about my social life? Let’s get this done with? ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/6 "2010-04-17T16:35:55Z")
Yawn. Jesus, **even sven** , i have no problem with you, but you do tend to get a bit dramatic about some things. Just let it go. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/7 "2010-04-17T16:51:08Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Yawn. > > Jesus, **even sven** , i have no problem with you, but you do tend to get a bit dramatic about some things. Just let it go. Did you read that linked thread? Other people were saying similar things as **sven** , but she was the \*only \*one that got crapped on, and had the completely irrelevant Cameroon/Peace Corps shit brought up by others. \*\*Sven \*\*wasn’t the drama queen, \*\*lezlers \*\*was. \*\*lezlers \*\*just has a hate on for her, she freely admits it. It’s cool, **sven** , she’s just a drama llama. let it slide. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/8 "2010-04-17T16:55:54Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Did you read that linked thread? Other people were saying similar things as **sven** , but she was the \*only \*one that got crapped on, and had the completely irrelevant Cameroon/Peace Corps shit brought up by others. \*\*Sven \*\*wasn’t the drama queen, \*\*lezlers \*\*was. > > \*\*lezlers \*\*just has a hate on for her, she freely admits it. > > It’s cool, **sven** , she’s just a drama llama. let it slide. Yeah, i read it. And **lezlers** admitted that she finds **sven** annoying, which explained her somewhat snarky remarks. But, after saying that, she also moved on, saying that it would be best for people to drop it. It was other people who kept poking the whole issue with a stick. I don’t blame **sven** for being somewhat annoyed with the initial retort; my point was that this Pit thread is basically flogging a dead horse. Hence my “Let it go” comment. It’s not worth getting worked up over. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/9 "2010-04-17T17:16:03Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > Hey, it’s not over yet. Anyone else got something to say? Hate Cameroon? Got a comment about my social life? Let’s get this done with? I know nothing about either, but could probably come up with some insulting generalities, if you like. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/10 "2010-04-17T17:49:02Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Yeah, i read it. > > And **lezlers** admitted that she finds **sven** annoying, which explained her somewhat snarky remarks. But, after saying that, she also moved on, saying that it would be best for people to drop it. It was other people who kept poking the whole issue with a stick. > > I don’t blame **sven** for being somewhat annoyed with the initial retort; my point was that this Pit thread is basically flogging a dead horse. Hence my “Let it go” comment. It’s not worth getting worked up over. Bullshit. Lezzie is a passive agressive moron who was quite happy to lob snarky insults at Sven all the while claiming she just wanted to move on and forget about it. “_As for the sven comments, let’s just drop it, okay? I don’t like her and I let another preachy, condescending post of hers get under my skin. In the future, I’ll just ignore her because it’s really not worth it to me._” Fuck that shit, the stuffy little muppet. Lezzies insults prompted other kitty fuckers to jump on the bandwagon and bitch about Sven, nice and safe in Mpsims where they would get away with it. I took one thing away from that thread. That lezzie is an insufferable jackass, with so little of worth in her life that she has to create drama out of the most mundane crap. And anyboy who uses that many “rollseyes”, and starts posts with the word “sigh”, is a bitch. Its true. This pitting is justified. You can quote me on that. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/11 "2010-04-17T17:52:02Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > This pitting is justified. You can quote me on that. OK. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/12 "2010-04-17T17:52:09Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > This pitting is justified. You can quote me on that. There you go. Happy now? I’m really not especially invested in the whole thing; it’s simply always been my position that a Pitting should be reserved for pretty egregious displays of stupidity or asshole behavior. This whole thing seemed like more of a storm in a teacup to me. YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/13 "2010-04-17T18:05:59Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > This pitting is justified. You can quote me on that. Sorry, but it just can’t be official until ivn gives his Seal of Approval. ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/14 "2010-04-17T18:22:47Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > There you go. Happy now? > > I’m really not especially invested in the whole thing; it’s simply always been my position that a Pitting should be reserved for pretty egregious displays of stupidity or asshole behavior. This whole thing seemed like more of a storm in a teacup to me. YMMV. I dunno. If it were just lezler bitching, I could see your point, but then several people came out of the woodwork to expand on that, all in response to a pretty innocuous comment. That would really, really bother me, to discover not that someone disliked me, but that several people were apparently all waiting for their chance to take a swipe. I wouldn’t start a thread over it–where can it go?–but I can see being taken pretty aback. I was taken aback. I have a soft spot for even sven because she’s grown up here. She used to look at the world so differently, and complained and bitched and griped about the world and, if you remember, people here tore her a new one–there were multiple pile ons about her whining, her self-pity, her unwillingness to look for real solutions to her problems. _She listened and learned_. How many people do that? Now, to some degree, she’s swung far to the other side–she looks at every problem as having a solution, and has no patience with people who seem to enjoy their problems more than wanting solutions. Yes, she’s contrary. She also tends to assume her perspective is more profound than others. But she’s also brave, self-reliant, willing to act, and when she gets bitched out she listens and reflects instead of getting defensive. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/15 "2010-04-17T18:33:17Z")
> [@MandaJo](#): > > I dunno. If it were just lezler bitching, I could see your point, but then several people came out of the woodwork to expand on that, all in response to a pretty innocuous comment. That would really, really bother me, to discover not that someone disliked me, but that several people were apparently all waiting for their chance to take a swipe. I wouldn’t start a thread over it–where can it go?–but I can see being taken pretty aback. I was taken aback. I was a bit surprised, too. It just seemed so unnecessary. And I agree, it did feel like they’d been waiting. And her post didn’t seem condescending to me. She expressed a difference of opinion than what most were saying but I don’t think she did it rudely. **lezler** ’s reaction really puzzled me, as did everyone else’s. It just came off as a bit nasty. Well, more than a bit to be honest. ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/16 "2010-04-17T18:34:30Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > Bullshit. > > Lezzie is a passive agressive moron who was quite happy to lob snarky insults at Sven all the while claiming she just wanted to move on and forget about it. > > “_As for the sven comments, let’s just drop it, okay? I don’t like her and I let another preachy, condescending post of hers get under my skin. In the future, I’ll just ignore her because it’s really not worth it to me._” > > Fuck that shit, the stuffy little muppet. > > Lezzies insults prompted other kitty fuckers to jump on the bandwagon and bitch about Sven, nice and safe in Mpsims where they would get away with it. I took one thing away from that thread. That lezzie is an insufferable jackass, with so little of worth in her life that she has to create drama out of the most mundane crap. > And anyboy who uses that many “rollseyes”, and starts posts with the word “sigh”, is a bitch. Its true. > > This pitting is justified. You can quote me on that. Seriously. If she’s as passive aggressive as she was in that thread and in the real life situation it describes, then sheesh. Lobbing out a last insult or two while simultaneously pretending to be mature enough to move on is completely manipulative. **Sven** is right. **Lezlers** seems like a person who creates high expectations of the people in her life, without bothering to inform those people what those expectations are, and then attempts to manipulate those people indirectly when they don’t live up. I’ve had friends like that, and it’s lame. Her insults and the subsequent pile on were in bad, bad taste. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/17 "2010-04-17T19:04:45Z")
I knew a guy named Cameron once, and he was a bit of a dick. Maroon is something of another way of calling someone a moron. So naturally, it follows that Cameroon must be a nation full of dickish morons. Or something like that. 😛 * * * All the cool kids have stopped wearing tinfoil hats and moved to copper. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/18 "2010-04-17T19:20:40Z")
“Kittty fuckers?” ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/19 "2010-04-17T19:28:22Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > “Kittty fuckers?” Kittties are sexxxy. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460/20 "2010-04-17T19:32:17Z")
the snake at **even sven** did rather come out of the blue, didn’t it? Of course **lezlers** was describing a get together of gaming geeks with no social skills. If you can imagine. Maybe that explains it. Regards, Shodan [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-lezlers-if-you-got-something-to-say-to-me-just-say-it/536460.md?page=2)