# Yo Mama (Geek Style) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 12, 2006, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403 "2006-04-12T17:03:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![JustAnotherGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/58f4c7/32.png) [@JustAnotherGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustAnotherGeek)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2006, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/81 "2006-04-17T01:19:08Z")
Yo mama’s so fat, seismologists haven’t found the depth at which the fat stops. They know it’s got to be there, 'cause they know she’s a “Mo-ho” Yo mama’s so fat, her fat-quakes have no measureable shadow zones. Yo mama’s so fat, her blood pressure squeezes Iron into Tellurium. Yo mama’s so fat, she had a walk-in colonoscopy. eeeeeeewwwwwwwww… sorry Yo mama’s so dumb, she tole summun Cecil was wrong! ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2006, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/82 "2006-04-17T23:16:56Z")
Yo Mama so dumb, she claimed that .99999… != 1 Yo Mama so dumb, when Monty offered to let her switch doors, she stayed. Yo Mama so dumb, she’s STILL looking for the third word that ends in -gry. Yo Mama so dumb, she thought infinity was a number. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2006, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/83 "2006-04-18T02:19:23Z")
[QUOTE=JustAnotherGeek] Yo mama’s so fat, she bends _light_. [/QUOTE] I don’t know what’s worse – that I told this particular joke to my father & brother, or that _they both laughed very hard_. Yo Mama’s so ugly, horny teenage geeks download nekkid pics of her – AND SEND THEM RIGHT BACK. ---
**Author:** ![Greves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e99b99/32.png) [@Greves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greves)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/84 "2006-04-25T05:32:11Z")
[QUOTE=Doom Slinger] [QUOTE=pinkfreud] Yo’ mama’s so fat that when she put on the Van Allen belt, she had to let it out a notch. [/QUOTE] Oh yeah? Well, yo mama’s so fat, she thought the Kuiper Belt was too tight. [/QUOTE] Is that so? Yo momma’s so fat, she had to move Betelgeuse aside to just barely squeeze in _Orion’s_ belt! Yo momma’s so fat, what you see is just the tip of the iceberg - the rest of her is still making its way through from the 6th dimension! Yo momma’s so fat, I can’t even find her anymore - she recently exceeded the Schwarzschild mass! Yo momma’s so dumb, she thinks _real_ space is complex! Yo momma’s so fat, she stops 0.01% of neutrinos. ---
**Author:** ![Greves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e99b99/32.png) [@Greves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greves)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/85 "2006-04-25T05:42:23Z")
My friend: Yo momma’s so dumb, she can’t prove Sylow’s First Theorem. My retort: Oh yeah? Yo momma’s so dumb, she can’t even _use_ Sylow’s First Theorem to prove _Fermat’s Little Theorem_!! ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/86 "2006-04-25T06:20:40Z")
Yo mama’s so fat, when she walks past a tree owls wake up and start hunting! (This gem was posted originally in an excellent Pit-rant by a poster named Skinny Boy, but I can’t seem to link to it anymore) ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/87 "2006-04-25T12:45:58Z")
Yo mama’s so fat, when her shadow hits the ground it registers 8.7 on the Richter Scale. Yo mama’s so dumb, she still thinks digital watches are a pretty good idea. Yo mama’s so fat, even DOE’s IBM BlueGene/L system (installed at DOE’s Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory) isn’t capable of calculating her weight. ---
**Author:** ![AtomicDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@AtomicDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AtomicDog)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/88 "2006-04-25T14:55:29Z")
Yo mama’s so fat, her gravity tore the Earth apart and created a ring! ---
**Author:** ![AtomicDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@AtomicDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AtomicDog)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/89 "2006-04-25T15:03:32Z")
Ooh! Ooh! Yo mama’s so fat, the Silver Surfer took one look at her and called Galactus! ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/90 "2006-04-25T15:14:42Z")
Your momma’s so fat, she doesn’t have a mons pubis, she’s got a Mons Olympus! Your momma’s missing so many teeth, it looks like her tongue is in jail! OK, that wasn’t really geeky, but it is my favorite Dozens line. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/91 "2006-04-25T17:34:45Z")
Yo momma so fat, her Schwarzchild radius is a megaparsec. ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/92 "2006-04-25T21:25:47Z")
Yo mama so fat, the phlebotomist drew gravy out of her arm. Yeah, I know… weak ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/93 "2006-04-25T22:19:39Z")
[QUOTE=AtomicDog] Ooh! Ooh! Yo mama’s so fat, the Silver Surfer took one look at her and called Galactus! [/QUOTE] And to piggy-back off of this… Yo mama’s so fat, _Galactus_ couldn’t eat her! ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2006, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/94 "2006-04-25T23:01:29Z")
Yo momma’s so fat that when NASA crashed another space probe, they said it was because there was an error in calculating the gravity of yo momma. Yo momma’s so fat that the LIGO project has only been able to detect her. Yo momma’s so fat that whenever she moves she gives off x-rays. Yo momma’s so ugly that when she went to Paris, the police tried to capture her and have her installed on the roof of Notre Dame. Yo momma’s so dumb, she preordered a Phantom game console. Yo momma’s so poor and dumb, she tried to use 5,000 random coupons to buy something off the Dollar Menu at McDonald’s. ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2006, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/95 "2006-05-01T19:14:43Z")
Yo momma so dumb, she used Bellman-Ford on a directed graph with non-negative edge weights. Yo momma so hairy, when she raises her arms it looks like she got Einstein in a headlock. ---
**Author:** ![Bomzaway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e480ec/32.png) [@Bomzaway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bomzaway)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2006, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/96 "2006-05-02T00:07:21Z")
I’m shocked that this hasn’t been posted before! Yo mamma is so fat, she looks like she’s approaching the speed of light. 😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2006, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/97 "2006-05-02T01:20:07Z")
I don’t see how that follows. Care to rephrase that one? ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2006, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/98 "2006-05-02T06:48:54Z")
Yo mama is so fat we should all consider ourselves lucky Cthulhu ate her first. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2006, 9:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/99 "2006-05-02T09:28:27Z")
[QUOTE=Daithi Lacha] Your momma’s so fat, she doesn’t have a mons pubis, she’s got a Mons Olympus! [/QUOTE] That’s brilliant! ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2006, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403/100 "2006-05-02T09:35:39Z")
[QUOTE=sturmhauke] I don’t see how that follows. Care to rephrase that one? [/QUOTE] I think it’s cuz it’s hard to see how you mama could be so massive unless she was approaching the speed of light. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-mama-geek-style/352403.md?page=6)