# Yo! paulberserker! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 22, 2005, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436 "2005-02-22T23:56:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2005, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/1 "2005-02-22T23:56:24Z")
What the fuck is your problem? You seem to go about [randomly](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=303697) [pitting](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=290504) people for their involvement in situations that you have no stake in. I mean, I know it must be difficult for you to scrape your drunken, offensively odored, anarchy in the UK ass of the floor of your flat for a real life, but do you have to go around demeaning other people’s sexuality? O.K., apparently you do. But can we ratchet up the reading comprehension levels beyond that of dead squirrel? That’s at least twice that you’ve pitted people because you took a joke they made seriously, not understanding the humor. I can understand that. Once, there was this Dilbert strip I didn’t get, so I went over to Scott Adams house in the middle of the night, dragged his pansy white ass out of bed and started kicking the shit out of him for making a joke I didn’t understand. Oh, wait. No I didn’t. Because I’m not. a. fucking. tool. So what is it about **Kaitlyn** that makes you feel you need to belittle her for something she can’t help, snotstain? You seem to want to be the self appointed one-trick-pony vigilante. So you keep pitting people you think are one trick ponies. There’s some kind of pot/kettle irony here, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Yeah, I guess intravenous Guinness will do that to a person’s brain. So when you can stay sober for more than a day and stop being a fucking asshole to people for being different from you, then maybe you can play with the big boys. Until then, kindly shut the fuck up? ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/2 "2005-02-23T00:13:56Z")
Those are two terribly lame Pittings by any standards, and he does seem to have certain issues, yes. Not to mention mood control problems. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/3 "2005-02-23T00:14:47Z")
**Ilsa** , you’re just mad because **paulbeserker** took you to school in the second linked thread. Granted, it was Dumbshit School, and **paul** only took you there to show you his desk and the picture he drew, but the point still remains: **paul** is a dumbshit. ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/4 "2005-02-23T00:17:42Z")
Hey, don’t be dissing intravenous Guinness now. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/5 "2005-02-23T01:24:17Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > **paul** is a dumbshit. I’m not sure he’s significant enough to qualify for true dumbshit status. In the other thread, I called him a prat, and I stand by that. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/6 "2005-02-23T02:09:54Z")
“My love for you is like a truck, BERZERKER! Would you like some making fuck, BERZERKER!” ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/7 "2005-02-23T02:49:02Z")
Oddly enough, **andros** , that was running through my head as well. ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/8 "2005-02-23T09:03:48Z")
Ha! Something annoys me, I take it to the Pit. Now, little **Ilsa\_Lund** , you can win Brownie points all you want with the little sacred cows here, but for me you can fuck right off. Don’t even pretend to _assume_ you know what i’m like. I’ve taken, ooh, 3 people into the Pit in 4 years here and 1500 odd posts, including you _twice_ because you’re a little arse licking liar shitbag. Obviously this makes me a one trick pony. Perhaps I should spend more time doing pissy little drive by one line posts complimenting Mods and people I find fascinating because I’ll never meet someone like them in my limited social sphere of me, and sometimes my parents if they’re back from work when I get up. Perhaps then other Dopers will consider me ‘A good Doper’, part of the wonderful Liberal lets all be super PC crowd nice to each other because, hey. we’re all the cream of the crop here. And listen son, I live in a nice big house, not a flat. Or my Mums basement. It doesn’t smell. I drink Lager. My social life is something you can only dream of as you wank away to Verhoeven films in your dimly lit room, with your pasty potato white skin glowing in the dark. ‘My love for you is ticking clock!’ I suggest you go back and read my last pitting and prove what I was saying was wrong. Twat. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/9 "2005-02-23T09:40:55Z")
Thanks be to fuck I don’t live in **Ilsa\_Lund** ’s world of bad movies and sobriety. ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/10 "2005-02-23T12:23:17Z")
> [@paulberserker](#): > > Ha! Something annoys me, I take it to the Pit. Now, little **Ilsa\_Lund** , you can win Brownie points all you want with the little sacred cows here, but for me you can fuck right off. Don’t even pretend to _assume_ you know what i’m like. I’ve taken, ooh, 3 people into the Pit in 4 years here and 1500 odd posts, including you _twice_ because you’re a little arse licking liar shitbag. > > Obviously this makes me a one trick pony. Perhaps I should spend more time doing pissy little drive by one line posts complimenting Mods and people I find fascinating because I’ll never meet someone like them in my limited social sphere of me, and sometimes my parents if they’re back from work when I get up. Perhaps then other Dopers will consider me ‘A good Doper’, part of the wonderful Liberal lets all be super PC crowd nice to each other because, hey. we’re all the cream of the crop here. > > And listen son, I live in a nice big house, not a flat. Or my Mums basement. It doesn’t smell. I drink Lager. My social life is something you can only dream of as you wank away to Verhoeven films in your dimly lit room, with your pasty potato white skin glowing in the dark. > ‘My love for you is ticking clock!’ I suggest you go back and read my last pitting and prove what I was saying was wrong. Twat. :dubious: Paintin’ with an awfully big brush there, aint’ ya. You figure you be goring all those beloved sacred cows of the straight dope? You’re not. You’re just another crank. Maybe you should change your name to **PaulHissyfit** ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/11 "2005-02-23T12:28:02Z")
Or you change yours to **HarborDriveByLawnChairPileOn** Or Knobhead, see if I care. ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/12 "2005-02-23T12:29:54Z")
> [@paulberserker](#): > > Or you change yours to **HarborDriveByLawnChairPileOn** > > Or Knobhead, see if I care. ooooh zing. Stick to the sacred cows. They’re more your speed. ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/13 "2005-02-23T12:37:53Z")
Never said anything about goring the sacred cows here. I mean wow, you really took me to town didn’t you? Pissant pits me, I retaliate with what I know of him. He assumed to know of me, I assume right back. But I’m willing to bet i’m a fuck load more accurate. Now run along sillybollocks, aren’t there some other threads you could be pointlessly drivelling on in? ---
**Author:** ![Harborwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Harborwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harborwolf)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/14 "2005-02-23T13:04:45Z")
> [@paulberserker](#): > > Never said anything about goring the sacred cows here. I mean wow, you really took me to town didn’t you? > > Pissant pits me, I retaliate with what I know of him. He assumed to know of me, I assume right back. But I’m willing to bet i’m a fuck load more accurate. Now run along sillybollocks, aren’t there some other threads you could be pointlessly drivelling on in? Nah, you’re more fun. You use words like sillybollocks and put quotation marks around words to make cheap shots. I’m hoping someday I can be as clever as you. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/15 "2005-02-23T13:46:26Z")
I’m wondering if I should change my name to **Pissant Sillybollocks**. ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/16 "2005-02-23T13:49:39Z")
Do it! It would suit you down to the ground. That filmboard of yours and Lisseners really moves at a pace too don’t it? Have you reached double figures in posts yet? ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/17 "2005-02-23T13:55:06Z")
> [@paulberserker](#): > > Or you change yours to **HarborDriveByLawnChairPileOn** > > Or Knobhead, see if I care. Just wanted to say that this made me laugh. ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/18 "2005-02-23T13:57:12Z")
Yeah, it has. Funny that it seems you followed all the way through to see who actually founded it and what actually goes on there. A little tip: when you pit someone _twice_ and _both times_ get your ass handed to you on a dinner plate, you might wanna take a hint. > [@paulberserker](#): > > Don’t even pretend to assume you know what i’m like. That’s reserved only for you? Oh, I see. You’re omniscient as well. > [@paulberserker](#): > > including you twice because you’re a little arse licking liar shitbag. > > Obviously this makes me a one trick pony. You’re not as dumb as you look. > [@paulberserker](#): > > Perhaps then other Dopers will consider me ‘A good Doper’, part of the wonderful Liberal lets all be super PC crowd nice to each other because, hey. we’re all the cream of the crop here. I doubt it. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/19 "2005-02-23T13:58:10Z")
that the thing Harborwolf, he wasn’t using the quotation marks to make cheap shots about her sexuality. While it certainly does look like he was, but I’m sure it was more likely a cheapshot at her \*referencing \*her sexuality all the time. ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2005, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436/20 "2005-02-23T14:05:46Z")
> [@Ilsa\_Lund](#): > > Yeah, it has. Funny that it seems you followed all the way through to see who actually founded it and what actually goes on there. > > A little tip: when you pit someone _twice_ and _both times_ get your ass handed to you on a dinner plate, you might wanna take a hint. > > That’s reserved only for you? Oh, I see. You’re omniscient as well. > > You’re not as dumb as you look. > > I doubt it. Hey! Check it out! It’s all about you again isn’t it? I clicked on your sig after what **Yojimbo** said. All I had to see was the number of posts. Do I need to click on it to clock its you and lissener creaming over Showgirls and Starship Troopers? And what does the above thread where I pit someone _that has nothing whatsoever to do with you_ have to do with you? As for my first post in this thread, I call it like I see it. Omniscience has fuck all to do with it, although it is one of my powers. So, what rating does your skin have on the Maris Piper scale anyway? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/yo-paulberserker/291436.md?page=2)