# You are a bad, wicked, naughty man, Mr. Specialty Store Owner **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 18, 2003, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619 "2003-06-18T03:52:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/1 "2003-06-18T03:52:08Z")
Today at lunch I made a run to the specialty shop where I buy my coffee beans. I enjoy going into this store in which I can buy bulk spices (paprika by the pound, who’d thunk it), hard-to-find kitchen gadgets and top-of-the-line equipment like Wüsthof knives. Then I noticed it on the shelf beside the teas. A jar filled with chocolate-covered somethings. I walked over to get a closer look to find CHOCOLATE COVERED ESPRESSO BEANS! I let out a muffled squeal. He must have heard me. Like any good pusher knows, the first taste is free. He offered me a couple to taste. Oh my God, are these things yummy! Forget the coffee flavored Oreos. Forget the Banana Pudding Blue Bell Ice Cream. Forget the Peanut Butter filled M&Ms and Reeses’ Peices. I have found my Achilles’ Heel. You are a bad man for introducing these thing to me, Mr. Specialty Store Owner. But I sure do appreciate it! ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/2 "2003-06-18T04:01:18Z")
Oh, dear. **Homebrew** , hie thee immediately to the Betty Ford Clinic for Chronic Caffeine abusers. One of my friends from work went through about half a pound of those evil little nuggets a week in college, and he’s still twitching 5 years later. (Of course, he _did_ wash them down with 20 oz Jolt colas…) Fortunately, I hate coffee, so I’m immune…to their…lure… Mmmm…caffeine _and_ chocolate… ---
**Author:** ![fnord1966](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ad7895/32.png) [@fnord1966](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fnord1966)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/3 "2003-06-18T04:55:50Z")
My family calls them speedballs. Unfortunately, aside from makeing me piss a whole lot, no other effect on me. most assureadly though, tasty. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/4 "2003-06-18T05:05:20Z")
Those are divinity in bite sized pieces! Absolutely the single best snack to take along for a long boring road trip. MMmmm ---
**Author:** ![BadBaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/71c47a/32.png) [@BadBaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BadBaby)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/5 "2003-06-18T05:18:48Z")
Avoided the little chocolate covered tick things for years, I mean the people reccommending them liked yoghurt covered pretzels after all. I now keep my need for these tiny bits o’nirvana very quiet-- just between you and I so we won’t have to share, 'kay? I hear there are flavored espresso beans, like amaretto and stuff, covered in chocolate. Gotta find somebody who can hook me up. ---
**Author:** ![guava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/71e660/32.png) [@guava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guava)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/6 "2003-06-18T05:23:19Z")
In university I overdosed on these. I ate so many that my stomach ached and I was jittery for two days. I believe they caused me to be caffeine intolerant. Now I can’t even have two cups of coffee without horrible stomach cramps. Lucky you can’t find these evil chunks unless you’re actually searching them out. ---
**Author:** ![The\_MacDairmuid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a87d85/32.png) [@The\_MacDairmuid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_MacDairmuid)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/7 "2003-06-18T06:08:41Z")
Pass the buzz-candy, **BadBaby**. I won’t tell anybody else you have it. I don’t ever buy the things myself because I will eat whatever amount I buy one after the other until the bag is gone. Usually washed down with whatever coffee I got at the shop. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/8 "2003-06-18T06:15:18Z")
Has anybody tried the “nescafe iced coffee syrup”? You’re supposed to mix it with milk and crushed ice, meh, it’s ok. But OMG try pouring it on vanilla ice cream, YUM! It’s not coffee flavoured syrup, it’s like real, incredibly strong coffee in syrup form. ---
**Author:** ![BraheSilver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@BraheSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BraheSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/9 "2003-06-18T06:36:55Z")
We call them “methamphetibeans” around here, for the obvious reason. But I always need something to drink right afterwards, because I get the little gritty bits stuck in the back of my mouth. Which reminds me… time for another Trader Joe’s run! ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/10 "2003-06-18T11:51:09Z")
Bad, wicked and naughty. I can do that! I loves me some of them little speed beans! A couple handfulls of those and I could be an _especially_ bad, wicked and naughty man. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![DaToad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@DaToad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaToad)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/11 "2003-06-18T12:51:44Z")
Hey **Home** , did you drive to Dallas or Shreeveport during lunch? Don’t try to tell me that T-town actually has a gourmet shop. Who’ed a thunk it? ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/12 "2003-06-18T13:36:55Z")
Spices Unlimited on State Line. We even have a place that sells beignets and New Orleans-style cafe now. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/13 "2003-06-18T13:38:48Z")
You mean they’re like Poppers, **swampy**? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/14 "2003-06-18T14:23:46Z")
Sweet tasty little bite-sized bits of heaven - the Crack of the Coffee World. With just the smallest bitter aftertaste, which makes you eat another, which has just the smallest bitter aftertaste, which makes you eat an… MMMmmmmmmm methamphetabeans ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/15 "2003-06-18T14:39:22Z")
Papa Tiger loves to tell the tale of the time when he had a friend visiting with his 3-year-old daughter, who sat there nibbling on the methamphetibeans (thanks, **BraheSilver**!) and giving them to his daughter, not realizing quite what they were, I guess, until it’s safe to say that Little Bean was bouncing so high that, as Papa Tiger puts it, she didn’t come down far enough to bounce off the walls. Hehehe! 😃 They sell beignets that far north??? ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/16 "2003-06-18T15:28:58Z")
**Homebrew** , I mean like so wired I’d be **UP** for anything. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/17 "2003-06-18T15:46:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by swampbear \* > \*\ ***Homebrew** , I mean like so wired I’d be **UP** for anything. 😉 \*\* note to self: Buy more methamphetibeans for **swampbear**. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2003, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/18 "2003-06-19T00:44:12Z")
we had some given to us at the office back in my “radio days”… Every time I went by the front desk I’d get a handful… I didn’t have anything to drink with them… as mentioned the aftertaste was a bit bitter… added to the aforementioned grittiness… I couldn’t **STOP**!!! ‘fore ya know I ate a pound and a half of that sh\*t and commenced to havin’ hot flashes! I was tore up like a bicycle! I was so darn hyper I couldn’t MOVE! My brain was overrevved to the point that my body just gave up trying to keep up. It was GREAT!!! ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2003, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/19 "2003-06-19T02:20:56Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by verbenabeast \* > \*\*'fore ya know I ate a pound and a half of that sh_t and commenced to havin’ hot flashes!\*\* And that’s when I first saw the bear … ---
**Author:** ![BadBaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/71c47a/32.png) [@BadBaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BadBaby)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2003, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619/20 "2003-06-19T03:38:52Z")
Guess what I found at Costco today? Yup, spied that jar of methamphetabeans big as my head and had to buy them. I may never sleep again. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-a-bad-wicked-naughty-man-mr-specialty-store-owner/182619.md?page=2)