# You are stupid and deserve to live in your car with your kids. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 19, 2003, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640 "2003-01-19T15:01:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/1 "2003-01-19T15:01:00Z")
My SIL called my husband about a year ago to ask him to co-sign a car loan for her daughter. Her daughter has no job. Her son has no job. Both of her children are over 21. Her daughter has a daughter of her own. She supports them all on less than 30 thou a year. My husband, being a smart guy, told her no. He also asked why his neice was trying to buy a new car (that’s right a _new_ one) when she had no job. It’s not like we live in a city where you need a car. In fact, most times you are better off without one. But both niece and SIL had some sort of car lust so they somehow purchased a new car. Now SIL is 9 months in arrears with her rent and is calling everyone in her family so that they can “lend” her some money. My husband told her to sell the car. Niece will not do this (and, honestly, I don’t believe SIL wants her to.) The thing is, my husband’s family knows I inherited some money. All eyes are now focused on me. Well, screw you, you stupid, stupid woman. I am **not** giving you twelve thousand dollars. Sure you say it’s a loan-- but you can’t even pay your fucking rent. I _know_ I’ll never see that money again. I’ll willingly _give_ you a few hundred. If that makes me a bitch, you can just call me Mrs. BG Bitch-on-wheels. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/2 "2003-01-19T15:05:48Z")
Ye gods, your attitude is so healthy! Stick to it! ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/3 "2003-01-19T15:13:10Z")
Ye gods…I would do the same thing. Your niece reminds me of a stupid person I once knew who lives in my mom’s neighborhood. She couldn’t hold a job to save her life and when her inheritance from her father’s death ran out, she continued to live the hedonistic lifestyle she was accustomed to,buying new cars, wrecking other people’s cars, and even going so far as to have a baby by some gun-toting thickheaded jail inmate.☹ Oh well…best thing is to let these people self-destruct.We don’t need them in the gene pool anyway. IDBB ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/4 "2003-01-19T15:17:23Z")
_ **TWELVE THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!???** _ Egads! Don’t even send a couple of hundred. Think of what a worthy charity could do with that money, or better yet, picture a limo ride with you (and I guess you might as well take me, since it’s my idea) down to Morimotos where we’ll dine on the finest and most exclusive haute cuisine before taking in a play. That couple of hundred will just put off the inevitable for SIL for a month or so. Why waste it? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/5 "2003-01-19T15:31:27Z")
Well, its kind of a “sliding scale” thing with me. I haven’t got $12K so it is hypothetical. But I _am_ a pushover, and I’ve had to learn some self defense. If I had $12K, no way. If I had $100K, she’d already have the money. Or I might offer to take in the kids for a while. Or offer to cover first months rent and deposit on a new apartment if she dumps the car. But the car’s gotta go. But I’d have to do _something_. Like I said, I’m a pushover. Don’t know if thats a virtue or sheer stupidity. Don’t much care, either. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/6 "2003-01-19T15:39:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by elucidator \* > \*\*]. Like I said, I’m a pushover. Don’t know if thats a virtue or sheer stupidity… \*\* Did I mention recently that I’m available for adoption? On the OP, stand your guns (metaphorically). 3 adults in a household not managing to pay rent for that long is a symptom of major proportions. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/7 "2003-01-19T15:42:13Z")
**wring** –perhaps if one or both of the ladies involved had ‘major proportions’ they could use those um…assets…and become hookers! That would pay off their bills quite easily and quickly I would assume.😃 _ducks and runs_ IDBB ---
**Author:** ![The\_Green\_Feather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e7dd6/32.png) [@The\_Green\_Feather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Green_Feather)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/8 "2003-01-19T15:52:52Z")
When I read the thread title, of course, the first thought was “Think of the children.” Then I read the OP. Oh my god. I think SIL is a disaster looking for a place to happen. And her kids have learned that lifestyle. Don’t let her make the coming disaster yours. Nine months behind in the rent? 12_K_ dollars? If the rest of the family is going to kick in a couple hundred dollars each then you might as well contribute, but someone has to make it clear this is a one time bail out. I just re-read this post. I live in some kind of a dream world, don’t I? ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/9 "2003-01-19T16:14:11Z")
So is the niece’s husband trying to save up for [grad school](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=156797)? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/10 "2003-01-19T16:16:08Z")
I’d pay for a life managment class. My husband used to teach one at a homeless shelter. The class was for pregnant teens and he taught them things like: How to open a checking account and Dealing with Con Edison. SIL would need a more advanced class: Get your stinkin’ priorities straight. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d26b3c/32.png) [@UncleBill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBill)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/11 "2003-01-19T16:25:24Z")
So, she kept up the car payments, but not the rent? I’m glad you two got the brains in the family. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/12 "2003-01-19T16:37:11Z")
WHAT? You mean you’d willingly give this woman a few hundred bucks, with no thought of ever being repaid? Why, you utter whore. You filthy evil poisonous bitch-on-wheels. You vicious, soulless, rotten… Seriously, though, you’re considerably more generous than I would be, were I in your shoes… ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/13 "2003-01-19T16:45:56Z")
**Biggirl** , you realise this is just yet more evidence that all dopers wanna be you at some later point in life, yes?😃 [sub]I sure as hell am not gonna say “when we’re older”, and anyone what thinks Biggirl is grown up needs to think that one over again;)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/14 "2003-01-19T16:59:56Z")
Hell, every family has at least one Bozo. Even the Kennedy’s. “Hello? Hey, Ted, whazzup! You did _what!!!_ Dammit, Ted, we’re rich, that’s why we have chauffers! They’re paid to stay sober, you putz!! Ok, listen, hang up, call the cops and report the car stolen…” ---
**Author:** ![ganglian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7feea3/32.png) [@ganglian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ganglian)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/15 "2003-01-19T17:49:39Z")
Arent you the same dummy who cried about your daughter not letting you play with HER present, that you obviously got vicariously for yourself? Shut up. :wally ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/16 "2003-01-19T18:21:24Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by ganglian_ > Arent you the same dummy who cried about your daughter not letting you play with HER present, that you obviously got vicariously for yourself? Could you please provide a link to whatever thread I would presume you are talking about? **Biggirl** , I, myself am a marshmallow. But I’d have to draw the line here. Good for you for standing up for yourself. These folks need more help than money is ever gonna get them! ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/17 "2003-01-19T18:25:02Z")
You go, \*\*Biggirl. \*\* And when you’re done with \*\*Houseman, \*\* can I borrow him? I think I need some help in the life skills department. And he’s really cool to boot. ---
**Author:** ![malkavia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malkavia/32/5621_2.png) [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/18 "2003-01-19T18:33:32Z")
I would NOT give this woman a red cent. I’m sorry, but these people are adults who are perfectly capable of garnering money through other means (selling the car) and _GIVING_ them anything is only going to enable their behavior. ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/19 "2003-01-19T18:35:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ganglian \* > \*\*Arent you the same dummy who cried about your daughter not letting you play with HER present, that you obviously got vicariously for yourself? > > Shut up. > > :wally \*\* For the humor-impaired among us, of which you’re possibly a poster child, **ganglian** , that was a _joke_. You know, a spin on the standard old chestnut of Dad playing with Junior’s toy train on Christmas morning? A bit of wry, self-deprecating humor in an established tradition? Never mind. Whoosh intact. Veb ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640/20 "2003-01-19T19:17:52Z")
I don’t think **ganglian** likes me. You know **ganglian** , I’ve never been pitted. Why doncha do a search on all of my posts-- hey, it’s Sunday, it shouldn’t be too much of a strain on the hamsters-- and do a post by post character assasination. Really. It should be fun for you. 'Cause if you don’t like these two threads, then some of the other things I’ve said here should make your head spin. It’ll feel good too, what with you head so firmly lodged in you nether regions. As for the neice-- there is no husband. And as for making car payments and not paying the rent, well, you’ve got me. I suppose it was easier to make the car payments because those are so much less than the rent. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-are-stupid-and-deserve-to-live-in-your-car-with-your-kids/149640.md?page=2)