# You Beat your Dogs 2 Months Ago Because You’re Frustrated with Them, so You Adopt Another Dog **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 3, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041 "2010-08-03T19:39:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/221 "2010-08-06T18:22:54Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > > [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > > > Only a dumb fuck elephant trainer would do that. Fuck off back to your elephants, trunky. > > Oh \*no \*you _di_’in’t. Don’t \*make \*me call down a trampling on your ass. Oh, like your elephants are trained well enough to do that. _Whatever_. I bet you don’t even take your pachyderms for regular walks! And if you do, I bet _they_ walk _you_. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/222 "2010-08-06T18:26:20Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > > > Oh \*no \*you _di_’in’t. Don’t \*make \*me call down a trampling on your ass. > > Oh, like your elephants are trained well enough to do that. _Whatever_. I bet you don’t even take your pachyderms for regular walks! And if you do, I bet _they_ walk _you_. I heard that she doesn’t even have them paper trained… ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/223 "2010-08-06T18:34:51Z")
I have them trained to shit on command. On people I don’t like. While walking. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/224 "2010-08-06T18:37:00Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > I have them trained to shit on command. On people I don’t like. While walking. IN FRONT OF YOU or BEHIND YOU though. Don’t you see the problem with that??? Elephants can’t walk in front of you or behind you or even next to you, that’s poor as shit elephant training. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/225 "2010-08-06T18:40:11Z")
Plus if they jump up on you, it’s serious. Regards, [del]Bomba the Elephant Boy[/del] Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/226 "2010-08-06T18:40:22Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > > > I have them trained to shit on command. On people I don’t like. While walking. > > IN FRONT OF YOU or BEHIND YOU though. Don’t you see the problem with that??? Elephants can’t walk in front of you or behind you or even next to you, that’s poor as shit elephant training. You NEVER teach an elephant to walk IN FRONT of you. Then you’ll DEFINITELY have shit elephant training!!! ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/227 "2010-08-06T18:43:12Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > > [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > > > IN FRONT OF YOU or BEHIND YOU though. Don’t you see the problem with that??? Elephants can’t walk in front of you or behind you or even next to you, that’s poor as shit elephant training. > > You NEVER teach an elephant to walk IN FRONT of you. Then you’ll DEFINITELY have shit elephant training!!! Oh wow, your elephant isn’t potty trained? Figures. . .:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/228 "2010-08-06T18:51:29Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > IN FRONT OF YOU or BEHIND YOU though. Don’t you see the problem with that??? Elephants can’t walk in front of you or behind you or even next to you, that’s poor as shit elephant training. I ride the lead elephant. The other elephants follow behind in a train, connected trunk-to-tail. Fun fact: my brain initially combined “trunk” and “snout” into “trout.” Fortunately I figured out something wasn’t quite right as I was typing. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/229 "2010-08-06T19:23:34Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > > [@Guinastasia](#): > > > > You NEVER teach an elephant to walk IN FRONT of you. Then you’ll DEFINITELY have shit elephant training!!! > > Oh wow, your elephant isn’t potty trained? Figures. . .:rolleyes: Actually, I’ve specifically trained her to poop only on certain people. (Not on me) So beware… ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/230 "2010-08-06T19:27:15Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Fun fact: my brain initially combined “trunk” and “snout” into “trout.” Fortunately I figured out something wasn’t quite right as I was typing. I hear they’re making a movie like that: The Elephant Centipede. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/231 "2010-08-06T19:45:23Z")
I bet your elephant can’t pass peer review either. I bet it writes _mysteries._ ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/232 "2010-08-06T19:46:20Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > I bet your elephant can’t pass peer review either. I bet it writes _mysteries._ OOOOOOOooooooooooh, shit, son! Shit just got REAL! ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/233 "2010-08-06T20:50:22Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Actually, I’ve specifically trained her to poop only on certain people. The hell? You totally just stole that from me! I bet you don’t even \*have \*an elephant. > [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > I hear they’re making a movie like that: The Elephant Centipede. Actually, it’s _The Human Centipede 32,845: Everything On the Planet with a Mouth Has It Attached to an Anus_. > [@Zsofia](#): > > I bet your elephant can’t pass peer review either. I bet it writes _mysteries._ Wait, one of \*my \*elephants? Or **Guin** ’s imaginary one? Anyway, my elephants don’t go for that frou frou writing shit. They’re engineers. Mostly civil, a couple of computer, and a biomechanical. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/234 "2010-08-06T22:26:40Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > I’m just impressed that this thread now has a handful of honest to goodness, certified, licensed dog trainers writing in it. Who knew that the Dope had so many resident dog trainers! Professionals, at that. > (_I’m not referring to the dog owners talking about what they do with their dogs, I’m talking about the people actually claiming to be licensed, certified dog trainers_) I just whisper to cats. They don’t _listen_, mind you. ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2010, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/235 "2010-08-06T22:43:01Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > It’s official. You’re a fucking idiot. No, no, it’s been official for quite some time now, you just might not have seen it. **Curlcoat** is a troll, people. Many people (including myself) have been saying it for almost four-five months now. Give it up, you are not going to convince **Curlcoat** of anything…and she will never stop replying to you. She will have the last word. ---
**Author:** ![Meyer6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@Meyer6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meyer6)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2010, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/236 "2010-08-07T00:40:58Z")
> [@Idle\_Thoughts](#): > > No, no, it’s been official for quite some time now, you just might not have seen it. > **Curlcoat** is a troll, people. Many people (including myself) have been saying it for almost four-five months now. > Give it up, you are not going to convince **Curlcoat** of anything…and she will never stop replying to you. She will have the last word. It’s been more than 4-5 months. Your pit thread “[Why is curlcoat allowed to troll on here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=532973&highlight=curlcoat+allowed+troll)” was almost a year ago. FWIW, I actually don’t think she is a troll, I think she is genuinely that stupid and stubborn. I’d love to see her banned because she doesn’t ever engage in true discourse so she is a pointless entity, but unfortunately I don’t think you can be banned just for being vile old cow. ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2010, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/237 "2010-08-07T01:00:13Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > > [@rhubarbarin](#): > > > > I’m guessing the obsession with forcing your dogs to walk beside or behind you whenever they are on leash is entirely from Cesar Milan. I think he’s a good trainer (‘Exercise, disipline, then affection’ is dog ownership/parenting in a nutshell), but this idea is just as silly as the ‘alpha roll’. > > Nope - not for me, and I’m not actually advocating the dog has to be in a particular spot at a particular time - the walk is supposed to be fun for him as well. > > However, when we’re passing other walkers or we’re running together I insist that my dog stay by my side so that he doesn’t interfere with other people - that just seems polite and it does reinforce that I’m the boss and doggie has to do what I say. He’s a pretty well behaved dog, so I guess it works ok at least in his case. Yeah, as long as the dog isn’t pulling you around, you have control with the leash/heel command if you need it, that’s all that’s necessary in my book. But it surely is. I have heard people literally claim that the dog should always be physically behind you when you’re walking forward, lest he think he is ‘dominant’. That’s what I think is silly… ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2010, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/238 "2010-08-07T01:26:36Z")
Do too! In fact, I have TWO elephants!!! And they rescue children from burning buildings. And get kittens down from trees! ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2010, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/239 "2010-08-07T03:18:58Z")
this is the weirdest thread. the weirdest. Also napkins are delicious, provided they aren’t dyed. (And seriously, who puts condiments on napkins? That’s just weird…) ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2010, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041/240 "2010-08-07T04:05:53Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > First of all, pet owners who let their dogs lead aren’t doing it right. You lead your dog, you don’t let him lead you … for the millionth time. All you are doing is showing that you have read or heard a little bit about dogs and/or pack dynamics, but certainly not enough to actually know what you are talking about. Lead or not lead can be an indicator, but not necessarily a creator of leader status. Owners that let their dogs lead by _the owners_ choice are far more in control of the situation than a dog that chooses to lag behind because he’s hot, tired, bored or would rather go a different way. Now, a dog that is dragging it’s owner down the street is obviously in too much control, but you didn’t say anything about that did you? Also, anyone who is forcing/training their dog to walk behind them rather than ahead or beside them is looking for a slave, not a pet and certainly not a partner. > [@](#): > > Secondly, a dog doesn’t “choose” to walk behind you for its own “reasons.” It’s an animal not a philosopher. This really shows that you don’t know what you are talking about. Animals are quite capable of making choices - one doesn’t need to be a philosopher to do so. For example, a dog that is trained to come when called is just about to start chasing a squirrel when it’s owner notices and calls. The dog takes a last long look at the squirrel and then chooses to obey - or, the dog looks at the owner, back at the squirrel and chooses to disobey by chasing. This is one of the foundations of (good) training, to give the dog choices and consequences. > [@](#): > > Third of all … what the fuck do you think a walk is if not training? Uh, a walk. Nothing else unless you choose to make it something else. There is a lady near me who power walks for exercise and she takes her dog. She isn’t doing any training of that dog, she isn’t even really paying any attention to it. The other day I saw a couple walking their two dogs - they were talking with each other and pretty much ignoring the two JRTs lunging on their leashes. For another example, I did realize that I have walked dogs - when we are staying at a motel, they need to be walked. But I do no training when we are doing that, because the purpose of the walk is to give them the opportunity to go potty. > [@](#): > > Only on Planet Curlcoat do dogs magically become trained because they have a big back yard. The ability of people to make wild leaps of illogic never fails to amaze me. How in the world did you connect me saying that dogs that have yards don’t need to be walked? Is it because you somehow believe that the only way a dog can be trained is by taking it for a walk around the block?? > [@rhubarbarin](#): > > I’m guessing the obsession with forcing your dogs to walk beside or behind you whenever they are on leash is entirely from Cesar Milan. I think he’s a good trainer (‘Exercise, disipline, then affection’ is dog ownership/parenting in a nutshell), but this idea is just as silly as the ‘alpha roll’. Is that where this is coming from? I am really having trouble grasping this idea that so many people think a dog is trained by walking it, and that it must walk behind or the dog thinks it’s “alpha”. > [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > I’m just impressed that this thread now has a handful of honest to goodness, certified, licensed dog trainers writing in it. Who knew that the Dope had so many resident dog trainers! Professionals, at that. > (_I’m not referring to the dog owners talking about what they do with their dogs, I’m talking about the people actually claiming to be licensed, certified dog trainers_) Did anyone do that? As far as I know, trainers aren’t licensed and certified is something anybody can get - PetSmart does it for example. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-beat-your-dogs-2-months-ago-because-you-re-frustrated-with-them-so-you-adopt-another-dog/549041.md?page=13)