# You don't me, but I'm 20K in debt. Help me out? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 16, 2002, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244 "2002-08-16T20:49:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2002, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/61 "2002-08-19T23:05:20Z")
Well, I’m glad Deskmonkey said it, cuz I’ve been thinking it since the start. Kudos, man. ---
**Author:** ![bluecanary](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bluecanary/32/3614_2.png) [@bluecanary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bluecanary)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2002, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/62 "2002-08-19T23:50:06Z")
I read about this on the news and on other websites… …And I don’t have a single problem with it. She’s come up with something that I don’t recall the net having been used before; she’s put together a fairly well-designed and humorous web site; and gambled (with time and with things like the domain name) on it getting as big and famous as it has. I don’t know if she realised how much grief it would cause her at first, but she’s handling it well and with daring now. OK, she’s a _panhandler_. But there are several differences between Karyn and your average city-street beggar:[ul] [li]She has done more for the money than most; putting together the site in the first place and updating it regularly.[/li][li]She hasn’t committed any crime, nor is she (I certainly don’t believe anyway) feeding a drug addiction[/li][li]She demonstrates definite willingness to learn from her mistakes[/li][li]Most importantly; _i]NOTHING is inflicting her on you._\* You visit her web page _ **entirely by choice** _![/li] [/ul] You go girl :), IJ ---
**Author:** ![DeskMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f14d63/32.png) [@DeskMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeskMonkey)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/63 "2002-08-20T00:22:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Stoid \* > \*\*Well, I’m glad Deskmonkey said it, cuz I’ve been thinking it since the start. Kudos, man. \*\* I calls 'em like I sees 'em. There’s some green-eyed critters about the place. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/64 "2002-08-20T00:23:20Z")
> [@](#): > > From reading all the venomous responses in this thread, I can’t help but extrapolate “Damn, I wish I’d thought of that!” I’m hearing a lot of misplaced rage and, dare I say it, jealousy. Cut a sister some slack!! (preferably Dolce & Gabbana in a nice creamy silk!) Jealousy? You BET it’s jealousy. I’m sick and tired of it. ALL my life I had to watch the perky, pretty shallow twits get everything in life. All they had to do was giggle and be cute and it was their’s. If they fucked up someone would bail them out, because they’re just so darn cute and clever. This idiot racked up 22,000 dollars on her credit card buying designer crap, and now is asking people to donate-just for a lark. Shit, my entire student loan sum isn’t that much! Hell, I get shit when I spend 8 bucks on a fucking _Star Wars_ paperback novel, because I have to watch my money, and this moron has people sending her money because it’s so cute! I’m 24, I can’t afford jackshit, I’ve got my teeth falling out because I didn’t have dental coverage, and now I have no fucking insurance, I can’t work more than five hours a shift without a fucking panic attack no matter how hard I try, I can’t find a damn job, and I’m miserable, but this fluff brain gets people sending her money for being stupid because she’s cute. When the FUCK is it my turn to be fucking cute and shallow? But noooo…Guin, you have to be responsible! Guin, you have to save your money! Guin, you have to work hard and make yourself miserable! Life fucking sucks. It’s always the cute little bimbos who get everything and they don’t fucking deserve it and I’m fucking tired of this shit. Karyn can blow me. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/65 "2002-08-20T00:43:53Z")
Karyn can blow me also. That way she can have the facial she’s been wanting. Come to think of it, there are websites for that too. What I hate about this is the way she’s taking advantage of people’s generosity. Yes, they give her money voluntarily, but they wouldn’t do it if she didn’t ask for it. She is a leech. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/66 "2002-08-20T00:50:23Z")
Plus, her idea of saving money is Old Navy and Oil of Olay. That’s too expensive for me, still. ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/67 "2002-08-20T00:51:33Z")
FWIIW, I don’t think Karyn is cute. I didn’t really look that close at her photo. Besides, she isn’t my flavor. It may just be me, but I didn’t think cleaver or humor had a physical look. I’m not trying to pick on you Guin, but would you, if given the chance, take money from strangers to pay off your student loan and pay for dental care if they are willing to send it to you just for the asking? Seriously, if someone were to say “I love your direct honesty and your sense of humor, I just transferred $10 to your PayPay account”, would you accept it? What if that $10 added up to more than $5,000.00? ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/68 "2002-08-20T00:58:45Z")
I have bought clearance shirts at Old Navy for $5.00. My daughter bought an adorable coat on clearance for $20.00 (regularly $120.00). If you read closer, she bought the store brand equivalent of Oil of Olay and saved a few dollars. Manduck - Again, I don’t see her \forcing\ anyone to send her money. Of course they wouldn’t send her money if she didn’t ask for it. How would they even know about her? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/69 "2002-08-20T01:01:55Z")
To tell the truth? Honestly, I don’t know. Knowing me, I’d feel way too fucking guilty to do so. I don’t even like it when people pay my way if we go out to eat. ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/70 "2002-08-20T01:08:12Z")
Since no one commented on this the first time I mentioned it, I will ask more directly. How do you feel about this: > [@](#): > > WHY DON’T YOU FILE FOR BANKRUPTCY? > > In the long run, just who exactly is paying for me filing for bankruptcy - you! But not by choice. Your finance charges will go up, your taxes, etc. If you help me pay off my debt, you’ll be VOLUNTARILY giving me a dollar. > > It’s like the bootleg CD theory. They are all over Manhattan, but you just shouldn’t buy them. Because if you buy them, then you’ll run up the cost of CDs in the future. It’s like stealing. Someone’s gonna pay, and it will be the consumer. > > So you can voluntarily give me a dollar, then I will avoid bankruptcy, and we will all save on interest rates and taxes in the future. Would you rather that she file for bankruptcy? ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/71 "2002-08-20T02:09:16Z")
I’d just like to note that she made $5000 without anyone getting a look at her, so cuteness had zero to do with it. As far as I can see, there is still no photo of her anywhere on the site that actually shows her at all. ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/72 "2002-08-20T02:24:42Z")
You’re right Stoid, I went back and looked at her page. No clear photo to be found. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/73 "2002-08-20T04:21:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Diane \* > \*\*Manduck - Again, I don’t see her \forcing\ anyone to send her money. Of course they wouldn’t send her money if she didn’t ask for it. How would they even know about her? \*\* She is taking advantage of the soft-heartedness of those suckers, and I find that reprehensible. ---
**Author:** ![Jurhael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@Jurhael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurhael)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/74 "2002-08-20T05:27:49Z")
“She is taking advantage of the soft-heartedness of those suckers, and I find that reprehensible.” I don’t see how it’s soft-hearted. From what I’ve seen so far, she’s been perfectly HONEST(which has been said like a million times here). I fail to see how that’s taking advantage of anyone. As for bankruptcy, like I mentioned in another thread, I always thought that was a BAD thing because of what was mentioned here and also because you can’t get credit for 10 years. That’s about all I understand about bankruptcy… ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/75 "2002-08-20T05:39:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jurhael \* > [B > I don’t see how it’s soft-hearted. From what I’ve seen so far, she’s been perfectly HONEST(which has been said like a million times here). I fail to see how that’s taking advantage of anyone. > \*\* How can that _not_ be taking advantage? She is benefitting monetarily, which is advantageous for her, since she is giving up nothing in return. That is what taking advantage is. ---
**Author:** ![Jurhael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@Jurhael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurhael)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/76 "2002-08-20T05:58:44Z")
“How can that not be taking advantage?” Well, none of her stories are sob-type stories, like “I have six kids in the hospital”. She was VERY clear as to why she went into debt and made no effort to hide who she is or what she was doing. I think people gave her money because either they liked her enough or they understood how easy it is to overspend. “She is benefitting monetarily, which is advantageous for her, since she is giving up nothing in return.” Well, I agree, which is why I said what I said on page one. However, it could be argued that her own site would be “something in return” and I think it’s a valid arguement. That said, I don’t intend to give her anything, but if she can manage to make money through her website, then more power to her. I’ve seen done often enough on other sites and that includes wishlists too. Maybe I’m jaded about this or maybe things like this don’t bother me unless there’s a scam or lying involved and I just don’t see it with Karyn. ---
**Author:** ![Jonno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f19dbf/32.png) [@Jonno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonno)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/77 "2002-08-20T06:47:56Z")
~jumps back into the fray~ 😃 More power to the girl. We’re a free enterprise system. Go get 'em. If you can figure a way to be foolish, selfish, irresponsible and get people to pay for it so you don’t have to take responsibility for your debts, you rock. Oh wait, she’s funny and honest too. Hell, I’m gonna send her my life savings. I have seen the light. ~takes misplaced anger and goes off to kick around a kitten~ 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/78 "2002-08-20T07:00:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Manduck \* > \*\* > How can that _not_ be taking advantage? She is benefitting monetarily, which is advantageous for her, since she is giving up nothing in return. That is what taking advantage is. \*\* What we have heah is a failyure to commoonicate… Yes, she is technically “taking advantage” of the fact that some people are soft hearted, or amused, or whatever, in the same sense that I might “take advantage” of the fact that papers are available for sale by buying one. But as most people understand the term “taking advantage”, it involves exploiting someone, usually by dishonest means or some other questionable practice. She has not done any such thing, not even close. She hasn’t even really taken advantage of the soft hearted, since to do that would require appealing to the sentimental among us with some tragic tale, and she has not done that. She’s been honest and funny and outrageous enough that people have said to themselves, “What the fuck? Why not?” and given her money. She has done nothing more reprehensible (and actually less, in many cases) than any infomercial has done in “taking advantage” of some people’s weakness for gadgetry or tendency to swallow advertising whole. I think y’all are still searching for something legitimate to hate her for, and you are imagining things that aren’t there. ---
**Author:** ![Pammipoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/87869e/32.png) [@Pammipoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pammipoo)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/79 "2002-08-20T11:53:36Z")
If I go to a restaurant and the waitress treats me really good, I always tip big. If a street performer makes me smile, I put a couple of bucks in his hat. When I see little kids selling lemonade and cookies on the side of the road, I usually pay with a 10 and tell them to keep the change. If someone makes my day, I dont see why they shouldnt be rewarded. Karyn made me laugh. She didnt claim to be a charity case. My $20 wont be missed greatly, but it will help out someone else who could use it. Besides, I like her idea of good karma 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244/80 "2002-08-20T12:45:31Z")
What bugs me is that I work seven days a week at three different jobs, and until finally getting a good full-time job a few months ago I was still sweating over whether I’d cover my mothly expenses. Just rent, food and utilities, plus the luxury of an internet connection. No designer shoes, no facials, and no begging. This, apparently, is beneath Karyn’s diginity. No way in hell that I’d ever give her a cent. And no, I’m not jealous that she thought of it first. I knew about [this guy](http://www.tafkac.org/faq2k/academia_149.html) over ten years ago. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-dont-me-but-im-20k-in-debt-help-me-out/124244.md?page=5)