P.S. I was of course joking.
[sub]stapler infractions only merit torture :D[/sub]
—Drum on every available surface.
—Stand over someone’s shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
—Change your name to John Aaaaasmith for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it’s a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each A.
—Staple papers in the middle of the page.
In our defense, Maxx, a lot of people are drawn to office work because they are organized and neat people (note how I pointedly did not call us anal).
Man Killed in Retaliation for Egregious Stapling Infraction
Film at eleven.
I’m with you, miller and, just between you and me, the revolution can’t come soon enough.
It’s coming up on 20 years, so I think I can talk about it. I worked for a defense contractor back during the good old SDI days. We had this secretary that was a bitter, bitter woman. Apparently her English skills were not sufficiently appreciated by the staff (Physicists, Electrical Engineers, and Pharmacodynamicists (/[sup]sp?[/sup])). Anyway, she felt it was her duty to let us all know what a bunch of illiterates we were. She made these tiny little flags out of slips of paper that said things like “sp.”, “c.f.”, “r.o.” and the like. She would pour over your memo, /[sup]c.f.[/sup] and for each problem she found, she’d pinch up the paper, slip it in one side of the stapler, and slip one of her flags in the other side. Upon stapling, and smoothing the paper out, the flag would stick up vertically about 3/4 of an inch.
What did you do with her body after you smothered her with duct tape? I know, the same thing you did with MrKnowItAll.
Your cat hasn’t figured out how to snag the end and pull it down against the wall? Good grief, our cat is so dense she once spent a couple weeks with the inlaws and couldn’t find her way around the apartment when she came back, and even she can manage that one.
And the only proper way to hang toilet paper is loose end over, so that the little printed or quilted pattern is right side up.
One thing about my workplace that drives me batshit crazy is when people staple two or three pieces of paper together with 4-5 staples. This is especially maddening when I have to make copies, because even with a staple remover, I still get a lot of rips. Argh!
There you go again! You left the “a” out of “margarine”.
It’s probably not technically wrong, but it does reflect a certain deficiency of character.
I totally understand this. It took a long time for me to smother this kind of urge. Reminding myself of my hourly rate of pay helped.
Hey Lux, where you been?
When I need to restaple or add items to a packet, I carefully take the staple out, add what is needed, jog all pages into alignment, and them carefully staple through the preexisting staple holes in the top sheet. If the holes are in an inappropriate location, a cover page is in order.
Uh…how the hell is anyone supposed to read a document stapled THIS way? Who DOES this?
Removing the old staple and restapling is fine, admirable even, but that fussy lining up the holes or covering “inappropriate” holes strikes me as over the top.
I’m willing to make a deal with all you office types: You can tell me how you want documents delivered to you, but you will not even think clean and neat work area at me. My paper and book covered desk is to remain in its state of perpetual dissarray.
Oh, and toilet paper goes down the wall, heathens.
As does using the “have the staple prongs point away from the staple middle” setting on the stapler. :eek: