# You have $500,000 to spend on your body **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 21, 2014, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338 "2014-01-21T03:15:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![amorali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3e96dc/32.png) [@amorali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amorali)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/1 "2014-01-21T03:15:14Z")
And you can’t give it away or share with anyone. You don’t have to use it all but there is no merit in not using it all. Would you get any surgery, procedure, training, modification, tattoos or body work done? What would it be? You have to use all the money in two years so no “massages for life” answers. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/2 "2014-01-21T03:19:58Z")
A full set of dental implants to replace all my bad teeth. ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/3 "2014-01-21T03:27:36Z")
Is $500K enough for a lab to grow me a few new livers? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/4 "2014-01-21T03:33:00Z")
Buy some high end vehicles I’ve always dreamed about. I’ll do some traveling but I imagine it wouldn’t be a lot seeing as how I couldn’t offer to take some one with me all expenses paid. ---
**Author:** ![amorali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3e96dc/32.png) [@amorali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amorali)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/5 "2014-01-21T03:39:31Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Buy some high end vehicles I’ve always dreamed about. > I’ll do some traveling but I imagine it wouldn’t be a lot seeing as how I couldn’t offer to take some one with me all expenses paid. It has to be spent on your body. ---
**Author:** ![amorali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3e96dc/32.png) [@amorali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amorali)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/6 "2014-01-21T03:41:35Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Is $500K enough for a lab to grow me a few new livers? Maybe to get some on the black market… ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/7 "2014-01-21T03:48:28Z")
Trainer, cook, and some spare time off work to work out more. Oh and probably some laser surgery for scars and stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/8 "2014-01-21T04:15:53Z")
> [@amorali](#): > > It has to be spent on your body. Sorry, misread. In that case, I got nothing. ---
**Author:** ![amorali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3e96dc/32.png) [@amorali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amorali)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/9 "2014-01-21T04:31:18Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Sorry, misread. > > In that case, I got nothing. Really? How old are you? ---
**Author:** ![VeroTrem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/73ab20/32.png) [@VeroTrem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VeroTrem)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/10 "2014-01-21T05:13:38Z")
LASIK/PRK Surgery both eyes: ~$5k Abs microliposuction/sculpting: $10k? Permanent hair removal (you know where!): $2k? Personal trainer and massage therapist for two years: $100k? A little facial cosmetic surgery?? I’m out. I don’t see how you can spend $500k on your body in two years unless you want to turn your face into a freak show or have a real medical condition that needs to be treated. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/11 "2014-01-21T05:27:15Z")
Teeth, definitely. Not sure how much that would cover, so if there’s anything left over I might consider something to make my hair look full and natural for my age. As much as I’m not vain enough to have bothered doing anything about my hair until now, if the opportunity and money turned up I’d give it a red hot go. ---
**Author:** ![Boogly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Boogly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boogly)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/12 "2014-01-21T05:34:53Z")
I’d pay a doc to tell me I have bad knees and buy a vehicle to help preserve my knees. Buy a house with a gym. Get some mutts for my mental health because kids and mutts are awesome. Get a tat on my forearm for my daughter to match the one for my son. I’m sure I could find many ways to spend money to keep me mentally fit. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/13 "2014-01-21T05:49:46Z")
Become a really shitty Steve Austin. Failing that, pay for a girl to seduce **zoid** , drug him, dump him in a bathtub full of ice. Then I got my liver(s) cheap. Or get the Social Enhancer or the thing what sees through walls in _Deux Ex_. ---
**Author:** ![Marlonius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@Marlonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlonius)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/14 "2014-01-21T05:59:09Z")
I really can’t think of anything. I’m male pattern balding, but don’t have faith in the technology of transplants, nor would I want to take any drugs, so that’s out. I suppose I’ve never liked my jawline, but not enough to submit to surgery. I’m in good physical shape, get lots of exercise, don’t need any joints replaced. Yeah. I’ll have to pass on that one. Great question though, forcing myself to answer it made me appreciate what I’ve got. ---
**Author:** ![Vagabond](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/258eb7/32.png) [@Vagabond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vagabond)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/15 "2014-01-21T07:05:46Z")
Teeth, I would definitely fix my teeth. Personal trainer and nutritionist, get into shape. Then tats. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/16 "2014-01-21T07:15:17Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#): > > Failing that, pay for a girl to seduce **zoid** , drug him, dump him in a bathtub full of ice. Then I got my liver(s) cheap.\*. Have you thought this one through? Do you really want the liver of someone who says they need a replacement? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/17 "2014-01-21T07:15:32Z")
Get my eyes done with whatever the latest Lasik technology is. Some really nice veneers for my teeth after having all the remaining work done. Two years of massages every day. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/18 "2014-01-21T07:20:44Z")
$10,000 = Lasik Surgery (nothing but the best, naturally) $14,500 = Gym membership + personal trainer (unsure of actual cost) $2,500 = Dental work (mostly fillings) which has been delayed for years due to near-poverty conditions. The remaining $473,000 to be spent on beer, chocolates, potato chips, energy drinks, ice cream sandwiches & candy bars to counterbalance the 2nd choice above. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![randompattern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@randompattern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randompattern)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/19 "2014-01-21T07:23:03Z")
Back surgery Knee surgery Dental implants Eye surgery Lipo (maybe) Psych eval.(absolutely) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2014, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338/20 "2014-01-21T07:23:11Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > A full set of dental implants to replace all my bad teeth. This. The most important. Afterwards, I can worry about baldness, physical fitness, etc. and maybe clone a new, properly-shaped set of eyes as well. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-500-000-to-spend-on-your-body/679338.md?page=2)