# You have my money now where's the SPEED!!!? Has Cecil spent the money on a Segway? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [March 31, 2004, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590 "2004-03-31T19:20:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2004, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/1 "2004-03-31T19:20:50Z")
I gave up the price of a large tuna sub (well medium sized actually) to subscribe to this board. Why isn’t there more speed now that there’s money for upgrades? Cecil has used all the subscriber dues to buy a Segway, hasn’t he… _hasn’t he?!_ ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2004, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/2 "2004-03-31T20:07:24Z")
Speed? _Speed_ isn’t important–how fast a MB can go from 0 to 60 isn’t _important_, Astro. What _is_ important is gas mileage, especially since gas is going up. And a bench seat in the back, with that nifty fold-down option, for when I need to bring home a sheet of cork board from Menards to make a bulletin board for the Girl Scouts. And cupholders. Hey, I paid enough for this message board, I want more _cupholders_! ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2004, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/3 "2004-03-31T22:57:07Z")
Don’t you already have a cupholder on your computer, DDG? They’re pretty standard nowadays. Just push the button, and the cupholder slides out. ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2004, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/4 "2004-03-31T23:39:39Z")
Ohhh, is _that_ what it’s for? I’ve been using it to store CDs. Funny, I never could get more than two or three of them in there… ---
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2004, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/5 "2004-04-01T12:56:41Z")
Speed is a hoped-for result, not a promised result. And, please note, there’s been no real change so far – anyone can post, up until end of April, so we wouldn’t expect to find a speed difference until May (if then.) ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2004, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/6 "2004-04-01T17:17:42Z")
> [@C K Dexter Haven](#): > > Speed is a hoped-for result, not a promised result. > > And, please note, there’s been no real change so far – anyone can post, up until end of April, so we wouldn’t expect to find a speed difference until May (if then.) Yeah Dex… sure … right … _He’s riding a Segway!_ That’s what this whole subscription deal is all about! A Segway for Cecil! ---
**Author:** ![Genghis\_Bob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/45deac/32.png) [@Genghis\_Bob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Genghis_Bob)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2004, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/7 "2004-04-01T17:37:37Z")
. . . say, that reminds me. Do you think Mel Gibson is the Cecil B. Demille of this generation? ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2004, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/8 "2004-04-01T20:39:25Z")
The hamsters have been running quickly whenever I’ve been online. I, for one, welcome our new pay-to-play overlords. ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2004, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/9 "2004-04-01T20:47:56Z")
> [@rimshotgdansk](#): > > . . . say, that reminds me. Do you think Mel Gibson is the Cecil B. Demille of this generation? No…he’s the Cecil B. DeMel. Sorry… ---
**Author:** ![alterego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6bbea6/32.png) [@alterego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alterego)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2004, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/you-have-my-money-now-wheres-the-speed-has-cecil-spent-the-money-on-a-segway/237590/10 "2004-04-01T21:07:14Z")
I did a count two days ago and there were 300 subscribers online at the same time. If I may nostracise (i just made that up), the board is not going to get any faster.